Thread: What to Christian guys truly think about divorced moms?
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What to Christian guys truly think about divorced moms?
Posted : 24 Oct, 2007 09:55 PM
I want to know what all you christian guys think about why or why not should someone get involved with a woman who is divorced and has a child/ children?
Would you date her? Why or Why not?
Are sites like this a waste of her time?
Please be brutally honest and don't sugar coat your response. If I truly didn't want to know I wouldn't have asked.
What to Christian guys truly think about divorced moms?
Posted : 30 Jan, 2008 05:54 PM
first of all hello and thank you for posting this
I too have been forced to stay in the same area that my ex is in and It Is very difficult to move forward with ones life when only one parent is thinking of the child or children, If given the opertunity to leave and take my children I would they like the idea but the laws in my state will be difficult to sway, this in mind their father lives less than 2 miles away and chooses not to see them or pay child support on a reg basis. Hows that for the law .
What to Christian guys truly think about divorced moms?
Posted : 9 Feb, 2008 05:11 PM
God knows what guy is right for you and sometimes if you don't listen to him you will marry the wrong Guy and even have children with them. God doesn't like divorce but it happens more now day.
I think we should be given a chance to see that we might have something to offer you.
What to Christian guys truly think about divorced moms?
Posted : 28 Feb, 2008 02:00 PM
Divorce is a huge problem in Christian couples these days, I agree, However, if the husband has an affair and refuses to stop, that is not the wife's fault. The Bible gives one reason for divorce-fornication. Audultery is different than fornication. Fornication is continuing to do it without regard for the other person's feelings. To brand single moms as damaged goods is unfair and wrong. Most single moms are that way because their husband decided he didn't want her or the kids. If men would read all of Ephesians 5 and not just a few verses they would find out the true meaning of marriage.
What to Christian guys truly think about divorced moms?
Posted : 4 Mar, 2008 08:42 PM
Hi Heavenly.
Let me encourage you that a majority of Christian guys don't find anything wrong with a single mom. I feel those who do, have responsibility issues and are fearful of being committed.
Being a single mom isn't a disease that can't be cured. It's an opportunity to be a blessing to you and your children. GOD bless your search and don't give up.
What to Christian guys truly think about divorced moms?
Posted : 5 Mar, 2008 06:14 PM
I would like to first say that I have been married. I've been divorced for almost a year, we were seperated almost as long as we were married she was a single mom before I met her with two girls. I was a lost sheep with no sheppard, saved but far away from God. When I was around 18, 19 yrs old I recieved Jesus as my Lord. Many things happened after that where I drifted away. In and out of church then I gave up. Trying to be a good christian isn't going to cut it:) He just wants us to believe, and have a relationship with Him first, being obedient comes out of love for God. My relationship went bad with my ex wife because my relationship went bad with God before that. He has shown me that. I was blind, now I truely see. I know many of the remarks and opinions that people posted for this question are from peoples own experiences. Let us examine our own relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ, if it is good with him marriage will work:glow: If your a single mom praise the Lord while your single ask for God to raise you up a strong man to guide your children the right way (Jesus) It takes a special man to raise children that are not yours. It takes a strong woman in the Lord to trust a man with her children amen
What to Christian guys truly think about divorced moms?
Posted : 5 Apr, 2008 02:57 PM
It depends, for me, how the divorce came about. If they just decided that they didnt feel happy together, and so they parted ways, i wouldnt date that woman. But if her husband became an unbeliever and walked away, and he filed the divorce, id consider her as eligible material. Or if her old husband passed away, i would consider her dateable, but then that would make her a widow.
What to Christian guys truly think about divorced moms?
Posted : 17 Dec, 2008 10:19 AM
Courting a woman with children shouldn't be an issue for any saved man, if open honest communication is flowing and everyone is acting professional about the complications involved with joint custody and parenting.
As far as being divorced, there are a lot of cult churches teaching singles to avoid divorced people like they are rubbish and do not have a heart that can love. That's one of the things I like about God.. He can take a person whom society has thrown away... and make something of them.
If anyone is unrighteously judging you for being divorced, remember the verse about the devil being the ultimate accuser to the bretheren. The adversary will try to cut God's mercy and grace off through someone who likes to browbeat others, or nagging rebuke. At this point I'm confident that rebuking your brother once comes from God, but rebuking and browbeating everyday comes from below. It's why I avoid fundamental baptist churches. You go in most of them and they see a small tattoo.. they'll be actively looking for scripture each night before service to throw at you so you either get it removed by laser, or just cut the thing off yourself. There is just no mercy with some cults, and while some denominations preach truth, truly it is all they do; preach. They never do good works like actually helping people get out of sin strongholds. A lot of talking, but no action in love = a church you want to avoid.
Naturally, you don't go to someone who has been divorced 5 times for relationship advice, but don't let imperfect sinners define the power, might, mercy, and grace of the amazing God we serve. I've seen divorced couples go on to remarry and their new covenant truly glorifies God. God doesn't call the equipped, He equips who He calls. Even on our best day, we still all fall short of His glory.
Thank you Lord, that your rule and love is not ultimately defined by sinners, but rather a close intimate relationship with you! Thank you Jesus!!!
What to Christian guys truly think about divorced moms?
Posted : 17 Jan, 2010 10:21 AM
I believe it is the epitome of motherhood to take whatever comes your way, from whoever dishes it out, to do what's best for your kids. If you got married before you were saved, and your husband refuses to change, You'll have to face God one day and say "I did the best I knew how. I got my kids out of a bad place." Also to widows-I'm only 29 so if you're a widow at this age, my heart goes out to you.
I think a lot of guys are afraid of the "rebound" aspect, as women often do come on pretty strong. It's good to be up front and honest that you do have kids, but there comes a point where the man feels "browbeaten" with them. If you look at many of the female profiles on this site, it seems they're looking for a father for their kids, and a man interested in them will have to fulfill that duty, maybe even before he is sure of his feelings for the woman. I'm not at all prepared to be a father, and I'm sure you've met men who constantly mention "my ex..." Sometimes it can be the same with children. You need to realize you're asking the guy to step into a difficult situation, and to meet someone's kids before I'm even sure of my feelings for her is often too much. I feel a bit cheated. I want to say "Don't I even get a chance to really decide if I want to spend the rest of my life with you before I make the choice about becoming a father?"
I personally also have only a High school diploma, and that is a very limiting factor when it comes to children. It's turned into a "safety net" for me in a way, because it's like saying "caution!! Cannot pay for extravagant lifestyle!!" At my income level, adding a child to the mix-well, there's every penny I make and then some too.
All this being said, many divorced women are unfairly dumped on. That should change, as we're all God's children. I would have no problem dating a woman with children myself, but would need her to be the "stereotypical" loving, caring, mothering one. I say that because I honestly feel I'd be a bad father, and to knowingly step into a situation where I could adversely affect a young child's life is hard for me to do. (Hence needing her to be all of the aforementioned things.) I hope this answers some of your questions, but just remember-I'm only speaking for me. Many men would love children, especially if they're incapable of having their own, and would love to be able to "hop right into" family life. That's not the case for me, but I'd absolutely date a divorced woman, as long as I was able to get to know her very well first. Because with love comes acceptance, and just as you can't force love on someone, you can't force kids either, as horrible as that is to say. Best of luck, and ps-we're all damaged goods, that's what Christ is all about. Not condemning, saving. Take care, Andy
What to Christian guys truly think about divorced moms?
Posted : 5 Nov, 2012 12:00 PM
I agree that divorced women are not damaged or used up goods. As a matter of fact, we could be considered seasoned saints that may bring more love and appreciation into another relationship that is Christ-Centered. I am a divorced single mother. I don't consider my past a failure, but an opportunity for learning. I am over my ex-husband spiritually, physically, mentally and emotionally. My reason for divorce is due to his marital unfaithfulness, but I don't harbor any bitterness. One of the steps to healing is forgiveness, in spite of the situation, and doing so allows us to humble ourselves and trust God to see us through because God is in Ultimate control of all things. God has forgiven us much; therefore, we must forgive much.
Jesus says: No divorce, except in the case of adultery. Divorce is justified on the grounds of Adultery. Fornication is a product of adultery, but not the sole justification for divorce. The justification is Adultery, which is marital unfaithfulness. (Matt. 5:31-32)
Therefore, my Sister in Christ, hold your head up high knowing that you are "fearfully and wonderfully made". God is not dead, and He is not through with you...........your best is yet to come! Romans 8:28 states that all things works for the good of those who love him. I believe; that is, in good and seemingly bad things also. You have done a good thing by moving on with your life, and choosing to be a part of the CDFF community. I have met some really quality men on this sight, you can and will too. I am more aware of the type of man I am looking for, and am confident that God is already preparing me for my future soul mate. The difference in this relationship as opposed to my past, is that my relationship will be ordained by God, His match, and centered around Jesus Christ.
Thank you for sharing. This was a very interesting post, and a nice thought provoking question.
