Author Thread: do u feel pressured to respond to msgs or winks from males?
Chris1589

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do u feel pressured to respond to msgs or winks from males?
Posted : 11 Nov, 2017 04:16 PM

somebody in the forum has the opinion that women here should have the "courtesy" to respond to a guy's message because he is a "christian brother"...



i think that women never have to respond to any msgs or winks here because of the fact that we are all strangers here...females have a right to ignore ..and if they are not man enough to accept and respect that, they don't deserve your time

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Jayzeee

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do u feel pressured to respond to msgs or winks from males?
Posted : 21 Nov, 2017 02:01 AM

No I don't feel pressured to respond to messages, I'm here to meet new people. So I welcome receiving them and enjoy responding to them.

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Obediencetotheword

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do u feel pressured to respond to msgs or winks from males?
Posted : 22 Nov, 2017 12:56 AM

No, I do not feel pressured to respond. We are entitled to our own preferences. The profile cannot restrict some of that so, we should still apply those little things when we get messages or winks. Well, at least I do. So, the same way I do not get disappointed when I do not get a response, understanding that the person has preferences that I failed to meet.

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Ocean17

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do u feel pressured to respond to msgs or winks from males?
Posted : 25 Nov, 2017 11:49 AM

It has happened. I respectfully replied to a PM and got hit with the unfavorable side of this website. I get asked out enough but I rarely meet single Christian men.....yet!

After reading some of the posts from members, I will remain pictureless on this site yet still participate in the forums. Blessings to all!

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DaughterofKingJesus^

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do u feel pressured to respond to msgs or winks from males?
Posted : 2 Dec, 2017 10:13 PM

If someone winks at me or .messages me I will look at there profile to see if we have similar Christian interest very important to me, if we do I will respond back with a friendly hi, but if we have nothing in common, or he doesn't meet my criteria for what I'm looking for , ethnic or religious affiliation or hobbies, I will usually move on to another person as they txt me.

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DaughterofKingJesus^

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do u feel pressured to respond to msgs or winks from males?
Posted : 2 Dec, 2017 10:14 PM

If someone winks at me or .messages me I will look at there profile to see if we have similar Christian interest very important to me, if we do I will respond back with a friendly hi, but if we have nothing in common, or he doesn't meet my criteria for what I'm looking for , ethnic or religious affiliation or hobbies, I will usually move on to another person as they txt me. Or too big of an age difference.

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LydialovesIsrael

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do u feel pressured to respond to msgs or winks from males?
Posted : 10 Feb, 2018 06:57 PM

I think we should not be so stiff and generalize to say one must answer, or does not need to. Let God lead, don't force things.

I usually answer, but not always.



If I don't answer... WHY? Okay here are some possible reasons:



Usually if I don't answer it is because the person just sent me a wink or a 'Hi, how are you', or some other generalized empty line, and given that I have introduced myself on my profile with enough information to start a conversation deeper than 'Hi', I feel the person is not putting an effort to write something of worth to me. I don't know, what would life be like spent with someone like that, that cannot find a worthy thing to say to me, and I will have to always initiate any deeper conversation? Or what, maybe they expect me to answer 'hi' again? Go back and forth with 'Hi!', 'Hi!' I don't know, it seems silly. If you want to talk with me, please spend 5 minutes to try to think of what you want to talk about, and start. It is your first impression, put some effort to say something. So unless I saw something in their profile that caught my attention, I might not answer that kind of message.



Then you get those whose interests have nothing in common with yours. What do I say? I honestly have nothing to say. Sometimes I answer, but honestly I feel that saying nothing is less hurtful, it gives less sense of rejection.

Please, before writing to someone read her or his profile, don't just look at their pictures. Only write if you honestly think you have some interests in common and your lives could be a match.

And if you decide to write, do tell them why you decided to do so, and say something worth answering to. You can say what you saw in their profile that made you decide to say 'hi'. Don't assume that I can read your mind and see what you saw in my profile that made you choose to write.



Then I get the divorced or separated people writing, when I clearly wrote that I am only looking for a never-married or widowed man. That makes me very uncomfortable. In other cases people give me a bad vibe and I choose not to answer.



Then there are cases in which I consider answering someone, but I just can't think of how to do so.

Sometimes I am just undecided.



Sometimes I am just so busy and have too many emails and messages and texts etc, that I simply forget to answer all my daily mail. I might see the note, and then forget to answer. Please don't be offended! I have forgotten to answer even good friends' emails, it wasn't for any evil reason. Don't blow things out of proportion and label that person 'rude', just because they don't answer you. Be humble.



But as I said, I usually answer.



Please don't be offended when someone does not answer, let God move them to write to you if they are the right person. Don't force people into YOUR 'politeness' rules.

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