Author Thread: Single Christians and Sex
FiveTen^

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Single Christians and Sex
Posted : 5 Jan, 2018 06:58 AM

I read Andy Stanley's book "New Rules for Dating, Sex, Love" and found it to be spot on. If only it would be adopted policy for everyone. It is near impossible to date without expectation of sex after a couple of dates. And I'm not "going back to Egypt." Thoughts? Anyone else read the book?

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Single Christians and Sex
Posted : 5 Jan, 2018 10:00 AM

You will have to summarize the main thesis of the book. Neva heard of it.

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FiveTen^

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Posted : 10 Jan, 2018 05:36 PM

I can't give you a quick overview. I would recommend it to anyone who wishes "become the person the person they're looking for is looking for." It's worth the price...and I don't have any stake in it. It is just honest to goodness truth and if we all practiced what Stanley promotes from his years counseling unhappy singles/couples. It's worth 100x it's price!

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FiveTen^

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Posted : 11 Jan, 2018 12:04 PM

I'll take a few quotes from Andy's book to give you an idea....."So while we are a culture enamored with the idea of unencumbered, consequence-free sex, we can't seem to abandon our infatuation with the long-term relational exclusivity either." "If you are single again, perhaps the following pages will empower you to keep the painful aspects of your history from repeating themselves. The present, what you're doing right now, will eventually be part of your past. The past, especially your relational past, has a pesky way of showing up at the most inopportune times in your future....There's enough unavoidable pain in life. I want to help you avoid the avoidable pain. Namely, pain you will experience later because of decisions you are making right now." And at the finale of a conference, a man asked Andy this question: "I'm divorced. Why save sex for marriage?" Andy answered, "If all there is to life is this life, if you are merely a predator and women are prey, if sex is just physical and disconnected from the concept of permanency, exclusivity, and relationship, then have sex with as many women as you can convince to hop into bed with you..Then he said, "But if there's more to this life than what meets the eye...If there is a God in whose image you've been made and in whose image every woman you've met has been made...if sex was created with a purpose and if part of that purpose is to enhance the expression of intimacy between two people...and if that fragile, wonderful, delicate experience we term intimacy can be damaged or broken through abuse, then your sexual conduct matters a great deal. So you have to decide what you believe. Not just about sex. About everything. Once you decide, the answer to your important question will be clear. Perhaps uncomfortably clear......I've never met someone who exercised self-control in the area of sexuality who regretted it later. We all know people who didn't, and do."

Excerpts from The 'New Rules for Love, Sex and Dating' by Andy Stanley

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PastTheEdges

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Single Christians and Sex
Posted : 12 Jan, 2018 10:07 AM

That's good stuff. Thanks for sharing!

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rhet404^

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Posted : 12 Jan, 2018 08:53 PM

Maybe people should start by reading their bibles and adopting those policies? Nothing against, Stanley, I like his stuff.



Spend time in God's Word getting to know Him and who He says you are and you'll find yourself losing interest in those things that aren't good for you.



I'm not saying you'll lose your sex drive, but I am saying that perhaps you'll start seeing women/men as God's daughters/sons which will change how you'll treat them. You'll begin to care more about their needs than your own.

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yourbestlifenow

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Posted : 14 Jan, 2018 06:35 AM

Thanks for sharing this. This is one of the main reasons I say

"no ..not going to date you." To some christian men. If I get the "red flag/download" dream from H.S. I keep my distance.

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Posted : 27 Jan, 2018 12:53 PM

PLEASE DO NOT MAKE THIS A BROAD STATEMENT! IT IS POSSIBLE TO GO ON A COUPLE OF DATES AND NOT HAVE SEX! YOU ARE SPEAKING FROM YOUR OWN PERSONAL EXPERIENCES! EVERYONE HAS EXPECTATIONS! WHETHER THEY ARE NEGATIVE OR POSITIVE!

BLESSINGS TO YOU!

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Cortezisboaz

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Single Christians and Sex
Posted : 5 Mar, 2018 11:18 AM

Why can't you give a synopsis of a book you feel has elevated you?



Rather than simply being a promoter of the book, why not actually discuss items or the topics directly related to this thread's heading?



How do you PERSONALLY feel about dating as a single christian and your own sexual desire, perspective and follow through?

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SWEETANGELKAA

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Single Christians and Sex
Posted : 29 Mar, 2018 09:20 AM

Alright heres response,,, it is all about whose you belong to,,,,If you are walking with the Lord,,,have died to self,, reborn living in Spirit full Joy, love, peace, set free under blood Jesus,,,and read your word and have intimate relationship with Abba Father, Spiritual seeking his will for your life,,,,Holy Spirit will help and lead you,,,,,I suggest you get linked up with some strong prayer warriors,,,and lift each other up....and seek the Lord,,,,even as the new wine,,,dont even complare to wordly wine,,,,and then then God sends the right mate, ministry partner,,,,,,youll have precious gift you both share in marriage life,,,,,amen ok Amen so I pray Holy Spirit lead and guide all to their perfect mates to complete the will of guide upon their lives....

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zsoltx^

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Posted : 7 May, 2018 07:23 PM

Personally, I never had a problem with this. You see, I also like money, and I have seen plenty of bank robber movies. If I tried to do the same, I might get away with some cash. But is it worth it? Is it really worth it? Not only I would ruin my life here on earth, but God would wipe my name from the book of life. And same thing is true for those who have sex outside of marriage.

I believe that sex outside of marriage is sin. And I also believe that it is possible to lose our salvation if we sin. If you ask someone this question, you can quickly get an idea about where they stand on this issue. You don't have to mention the three-letter S word. Just ask them kindly, "Do you think it's possible to lose your salvation after you get saved?" If they say "no, because my salvation is secure," then watch out, because people who believe that they CANNOT lose their salvation no matter what will believe that they can do anything and still go to heaven. In other words, they believe in a world where their actions will have no consequences. Sadly, this false doctrine is very prevalent today in many churches! :(

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