I would need more information before giving any answer. Such as... If you had been born blind and did not know what color anyone was, what are the qualities that you are looking for in a friend, in a leader, and what qualities are you looking for in a husband?
What are the consequences of going after a societal taboo relationship for you, him and your families? Are those consequences worth it in the long run? If you marry and have children will their lives be made difficult because of this marriage and if so are you willing to subject them to that?
I'm not saying that any discrimination is right or wrong but the societies that we live in will judge us no matter what God's word says. It's just the reality of living in a fallen world. May God bring you illumination to your heart and this subject
When I attended a divorce recovery group the speaker had a wise thing for us. Before you are married (or give away your virginity) kissing is just making out. After we have crossed that line it becomes foreplay. This is a sibling in Christ. If we truly Love (agape) them then we will put them first and as men be leaders and be concerned for their Holiness before God. If we are not concerned for them enough to protect them from ourselves then we are not good enough for someone who is a daughter of the King.
Look up the Virgin Lips Movement on the net.
Look at it this way... if a person cannot control themselves before marriage then they are unlikely to control themselves within the marriage by not sleeping around. Self control is part of the fruit of the Holy Spirit. Love and HONOR should start before the marriage not after the vows are taken.
When I was at my lowest I started reading Foxes Book of Martyrs. When the world hurts us I remember that sinners are supposed to sin. Christians are to Imitate Jesus. The betrayal of "brothers" and "sisters" is hard. But being tortured for years....
Still Jesus knows our pain and never belittles us whether our pain is great or small, emotional, physical or spiritual.
What a great God we serve. A God of compassion who teaches and empowers us to Love those who hate us. After all He Loved us when we were still His enemies.
Still it strengthens our faith when we hear of other people's persecution stories because no matter how the story ends God delivers His children.
Would have contacted you direct but your filter wouldn't allow. Have read many of your comments and two words come to mind when considering you.... "enthusiastic innocence" You are a treat a precious diamond in the diadem of God. You are appreciated. May the God who created you always take delight in you.
Anyone who tries to use a prayer and God to manipulate you or someone else into doing anything, is scary. Sooner or later they will try to control you in different ways. In the Old testament that act was called witchcraft. Some see it for what it is abuse.
If we are truly in Christ Jesus and therefore look to each other as brothers and sisters in Jesus then we are family reaching out to each other and it does not matter. If on the other hand we are looking for someone to defile, become our new idol, or complete us in a way that is reserved for Jesus only.... Then there are bigger problems. Those games would be better served on a different site. Don't you think?
You are not alone. I traveled close to two thousand miles to be around my children and their mother would not allow me to see the children even though I was legally able to.
The situation is still in progress even though the children are grown. If not for the grace of God and His abiding presence I would have fallen apart a long time ago. Remember, please take it to heart, that your child's Heavenly Father Loves your child more then you ever will be able to. He will be faithful to you both. Lean on Him and trust Him to carry you. If He will do it for the likes of me, it will be amazing to see what He will do for you.
May the peace of our Lord Jesus infuse every part of your being and satisfy your heart and soul
Years ago I was in a church were the Lord blessed me with a sister to minister with. We spent a lot of time together. We had good boundaries and accountability with the pastor, her family and our home group. We never hid anything. Our relationship was platonic. We were gossiped of sleeping together and me of being a womanizer.
Same church during that period I brought a homosexual man to church with me that I had been doing bible study with. I was gossiped of being a homosexual.
One person came forward and confessed that since they could find no sin in my life to accuse me of... they made things up.
They all called me brother during service. I told God at one point that I Loved Him but that I was done serving Him. But I could not stay close to Him without Him softening my heart. Bringing me to repentance. And continuing to haltingly follow His will.
A fellow who I had been doing a bible study with (unsaved) wanted to talk about evil things. When I called him on it he looked at me with anger and venomously said "your such a Christian". Greatest compliment in my life.
In these situations and more, before Christ and with Christ He has shown Himself trustworthy to "Heal the broken hearted" and he has taught me that I can "Consider it pure joy whenever I face trials of many kinds, because I know that the testing of my faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work in me so that I will be mature and complete, not lacking anything." (James 1:2-4 personalized paraphrase mine) I'm not there yet but closer then I was.
There you go Sissy, Hope this fits what you were looking for.
