Whats the odds? A million to one. Im in!. . . Lets Golf!
- Male | 61
- United States
- Mesquite Secret Underground Compound (SUC)
- Last Login Date
- Click here to learn more
- Eye Color
- Body Type
- Hair Color
- Other Ethnicity
- Body of Christ... Yup, Im the a$$ hole, brimstone & fire
- Looking For
- Church Name
- Lets Golf! for the Lord. any Baptist
- Church Attendance
- Several times a year
- Church Raised In
- No answer
- Do you drink?
- Willing to relocate?
- Sure, why not
- Marital Status
- Do you have children?
- Do you want children?
- Education Level
- Some School
- My Profession
- Professional Go Getter
- Please read on!
- About Me
Wow has time went by, one day your sitting pretty good and the next not so well. I know this maybe a long shot but I'm looking for a woman that will endure my shyness enough to message me and even call me. Its up to you! I would like a woman that will take care of me. I'm on oxygen so if you can handle that then I will be looking forward in talking with you.
Please help me evaluate the effectiveness of this profile and message me back one of the feedback answers below that best describe your feelings toward it, thanks!
1. If I ever see you I will call the cops and have you arrested immediately!
2. If you were the last man on earth, then maybe.
3. I want to have your baby!
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . !!!Welcome to the lonely hearts club!!! . . .
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Sit down, take your shoes off , ya all come back now yher
Did ya hear about the latest bible version? Yea when it comes to the feeding of the multitude with the bread and fishes, it simply says �and they handed out tuna fish sandwiches�. ;~)
Ya know I love the fruit of a good biblical discerner, their always blessed with humility, humble and humor. ;~)
There has got to be a girl out there for me one that believes in Jesus Christ the only begotten son.
Lets see, I like to golf a lot...I'm hyper cool... I like fast cars and rock & roll... I like my women in way short skirts and to travel by dirt bike when Im drinking... I may be willing to make some compromise in my lifestyle (at my choice!) but mostly ill just stick to my toil about the property, check fruit, adjust sprinklers.... and watch my dog catch bees... I do like to tinker with about anything that�s mechanical including model trains and planes... I have to demand that my next relationship cut back on the amount of sarcasm inflicted due to the high amount that I attract... Creating paradigms and teaching kids are my favorite pastimes... Watching Perry Mason and having a goody before bed is a must! Did I say I like to golf a lot!
To find one hot looking babe and become her sex slave and live vicariously off her for the next year or so.
Dive in head first!
Go fast and take chances!
Shoot first and ask questions latter!
Click on (Send flyby a Wink)
My list of importance�s
1: GOD, Jesus Christ and the Holy Ghost
2: Wife (if I had one)
3: Kids & Grand kids
7: Adult children <---Bumped Again...
Then I guess the dirt bikes, car, vacuum???
What I�m looking for?
A bare footed, Holy Ghost filled woman that likes to blow kisses from the garden... when she�s weeding it! ...One who smiles when she talks about Jesus and laughs at my jokes. A back to basics girl who�s economic and energy minded and uses very little energy, ...who�s content and has a natural way of achieving things for us with her reason, understanding, forgiveness and heart of gold! A sexy at home and modest when out kinda girl who wouldn�t mind waking up next to an nasty old fartt (you seen the pic?) for the rest of her life. A woman that will listen to me talk about anything including sex, politics and religion..
If any of you girls are going on vacation or any special event and need some eye candy for you to latch your arm to, Im usually available for a low rate and expenses. Just text and let me know when, where and attire. Thanks!
. . . . . . . . WOW, Girls! Girls! Down a notch on the first mail!!! ...
. . . . . . . . Just kiddin, I never get mail.
. . . . . . . . Boy, I don�t think I could buy mail here!
. . . . . . . . Please no more mail soliciting to sell me mail, thanks.
. . . . . . . . WOW, some of you girls leave a lot to the imagination and my imagination is like a runaway freight train!
. . . . . . . . Unless you are extremely rich and or goodlooking Im not interested in a one night stand.
. . . . . . . . Online dating has taught me how naive I really am, GULP! ...It's like junior high all over again!
. . . . . . . . No! I don�t want to deposit any foreign checks into my account!
. . . . . . . . Quick somebody e-mail me NOW! ...
There�s 24 girls here on CDFF that have (dirt bikes) listed in their (Interest)... ALL the dirt bikes are Hot!!!
Ahhh you must get mail from my last girlfriend or possibly boyfriend from Nigeria. She finally broke it off with me, she said it was because of all my endless drivel. :~(
- First Date
- First Date...
You come over to my house and we'll watch tv...
If I get that far, I'd like to go all the way! ...
Blessings to you and goodnight...
Everything above this line ^ is my alter ego, Every thing below is endless drivel.
I wana girlfriend :(
My granddaughter ask, grandpa why do people stomp and shout and say, Ill never live under a king and turn right around and say, I want to live under my King for eternity? I said, its all in the caps sweetheart! hehe Again she ask, grandpa why do you say this is not my home when we're home? I told her, well because sweety we really have a mansion! hehe Then she asked, grandpa why does the bible say "there was no harm in the pot" and you keep chewing my dad's behind about the pot?, WHOOSH! I replied, ahhh honey its all in the context! Finally she asked, grandpa how do you know all this stuff? I just smiled and said, its simple sweetheart its all written down here in our authorized Kind James bibles! ;~)
Well it�s a fact I aint no spring chicken anymore. I been feeling it, achy and tired near the end of the day. I�ve been thinking on what I could do help me feel a little better so I did what I often do when I need better understanding, I turned to my Bible. Well I just started reading where I left off last time and low and behold I come across 1 Timothy 5:23 Drink no longer water, but use a little wine for thy stomach's sake and thine often infirmities. Ahhh Eureka! This Bible has it all, this is just how God talks to me, wow way cool! The next day with no hast I make a b-line down to the local liquor store. When I get inside Im just in awe of how many kinds of wine there are so being a budget shopper I start to price compare and calculate the best deal for my budget and pick out a box of wine and paid the clerk. Soon as I got home out the door I went to toil with my daily chores, I worked extra hard just knowing that at the end of the day I be ok sitting in my easy chair and drinking my glass of wine. Well I made a day of it alright, I was whooped and feeling it, I come in and made a quick dinner and then to the wine. I put the box up on the counter and proceeded to open the it, I thought, darn if they don�t package these boxes up tight, finally I get the box open and there she be, a bag of wine. After pondering on the best way of approaching this I grabbed my trusty old scissors and carefully went in. I poked the bag and whoosh! It shot out like a fountain, it went all over, what a mess! I spent the better part of a hour just cleaning that mess up, by the time I was done I was too tired to even drink a glass of wine, I just went to bed. Well about two months later I finally choked down that retched box of wine and that�s when I noticed there was a little valve dispenser at the bottom of the box, gees. I just think about every time I tried pouring out of that box what a mess it made, I probably only drank less than a quarter of it wile the rest went all over my kitchen. I guess the Lord did have a lesson for me, �lean not unto thine own understanding� read the directions on the box! ;~)
By now many of ya will think Im a funny... but I have a sentimental side too, yea well my dog died a wile back, yea Little [email protected]$%^*, so I went to the pet store to replace him. Looking around about drove me crazy all the yapping and cawing gees all I wanted to do is get out of there. I hollard at a kid that was working there and asked him if he had any pets that was quiet and that I was trying to replace my dead dog, he kinda gave me a dirty look but then took me down the isle to these gerbils and started to tell me about them, I said yea, yea, yea just set me up! Boy did that kid start to stack up the goods, cage, food, toy, gees he even tried to sell me two gerbils, I had to stop him right there and say no, one will be just fine! Well I got him home, put him in the corner and decided Id call him Little [email protected]$%^* 2, since he was replacing my dead dog. Well Little B 2 , lasted about a two weeks before he died, so I called the pet store and talked to that kid and was asking if Little B 2 was guaranteed, boy that kid was terribly upset and shouted something about how Little B 2 died of loneliness and hoped I die the same way and to never come back to that store again, gees I don�t know what upset that kid so much, hmmm. Anyways I sure miss Little B 2, he wasn�t too friendly but he sure was quiet and I didn�t even know he was there most the time! ;~)
Im memory of Hambone, best dog I ever had.
Hehe yea my profile closely mirrors my dating status, its long and a joke.
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