Author Thread: Why are you single?
CDFF21467^

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Why are you single?
Posted : 8 May, 2023 05:01 PM

I noticed a lot of the same folks here and figured this would be a good topic for discussion too.



for me i'm very out of touch with my own generation and simply don't fit in. Almost everyone my age relies on snap chat, instagram or facebook to talk and the idea of talking in person is often seen as an alien concept. I don't have TV, I don't fallow the latest trend, no drinking, no drugs, no parting... add being a dedicated christian to the mix and it becomes even harder to find someone I'm compatible with. And most no one my age wants a real relationship, just hook ups, FWB 🤮 or just friends. The few times I find someone looking for the same things we find out they can't handle my minimalist life style.



So yeah, my way of life and wanting a real dedicated relationship isn't common in my generation unfortunately.



what about you? why do you feel your single despite looking?

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NotSettlingYet^

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Why are you single?
Posted : 10 May, 2023 08:32 AM

Firstly there are extremely few single Christian men in Norway (where I live).

I don't date divorced men, or men who smoke. (that eliminates almost half the men in churches.)

I don't date Christian men who isn't part of a local Christian fellowship.

I don't want kids, so whenever I find a single man interested in me, he really wants kids and keeps looking for a woman who wants the same.

I'm also not slim, so I guess some of my crushes have rejected me on basis of wanting a slimmer woman.

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NarnianGirl

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Why are you single?
Posted : 10 May, 2023 08:47 AM

I believe the lack of Christian men (and I mean those willing to have a relationship and to commit) is a real issue everywhere..



Add to that the fact I have not been married before, or do not have kids. Plus, I have been in ministry and that already scares most men off.



There has never been a serious prospect anywhere.

A few guys in my life were insisting on marrying me, and there were extremely dysfunctional, entitled and abusive, who did not understand the word NO.. so while I theoretically could have married someone, it would not have been a godly, Christian marriage union, and I would be divorced already.

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Sonie

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Why are you single?
Posted : 12 May, 2023 01:32 PM

Oh my gosh!...so true

You basically summarised the story of my life with your post!...I feel like you are my twin a million miles away...

Sometimes I ask are there any good genuine Godly guys out there ? And is it the reason why I am still single?

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CDFF21467^

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Why are you single?
Posted : 12 May, 2023 03:12 PM

@NotSettlingYet

wow that really must be disappointing, and i'm guessing not wanting kids really limits your options far more?

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CDFF21467^

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Why are you single?
Posted : 12 May, 2023 03:23 PM

@NarnianGirl

I think the same can be said about a lot of women too. actually most everyone my age in the US is extremely toxic and antisocial witch is said.

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NotSettlingYet^

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Why are you single?
Posted : 12 May, 2023 11:55 PM

Yes, not wanting kids is the main reason I am single. I have had loads of suitors over the years, but I am honest with them on the first date that I don't want kids not to drag out the heartbreak any further.

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CDFF21467^

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Why are you single?
Posted : 13 May, 2023 05:02 AM

it's always better to be upfront, who wants to be 6 months into a relationship only to find out some major dealbreaker. However here in the US being upfront about relationship needs it a turn off for a lot of people.

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NarnianGirl

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Posted : 13 May, 2023 12:06 PM

@CDFF21467



That's sad to hear (about the ladies around you).



Many lovely girls have become jaded and exhausted, due to disappointments .. which is not an excuse, but it can happen.



In the last 10+ years, there has been just a handful of Christian guys that were kind, friendly, open and able to interact with women in a mature and pleasant manner. I am talking about normal communication, such as talking in a classroom, preparing food for a church event & mskung music together etc.. not dating, just fellowship.

They were all much younger than me, usually from very loving families, and/or had spent time abroad as a part of a team, so they knew how to relate to women as sisters in Christ without antagonism.

Very rare to meet such single men of my age.

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CDFF21467^

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Why are you single?
Posted : 13 May, 2023 01:04 PM

"Very rare to meet such single men of my age."

🤔 is younger a problem for you or the men?

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FDCWillard

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Why are you single?
Posted : 14 May, 2023 06:12 AM

I see with this people often attempting to make what is essentially a practical problem a figurative one so as to soften the impact it has on them. Every practical problem has practical causes.



Speaking broadly woman are more prone to be single at later age than men if this condition is an extended one because they don't realize the nature of their relationship value changes over time and they keep expecting the same kind of men (that they never got before) even though those men either are in short supply or because.... those kind of men simply don't want the kind of woman they are.



Men on the other hand have it worse, if they are in later age still single and this condition is an extended one.... most likely they either made the same mistake the woman here did or are not the kind any woman wants because they are low status value even after all these years.



This is why men irrespective of age can sometimes get woman in their older age that never would have given them the time of day in their younger age.... their status value increased due to an accumulation of resource gathering ability. Woman on the other hand have it in reverse... they start off with an overabundence of value that diminishes over time as their fertility indicators diminish.



Men can basically put fail at being or becoming men.... woman can only fail at taking proper advantage of their natural gifts at the right time which impressively enough due to feminism is something that has been happening more and more.



Whatever the reason.... there is an epedemic of lonelyness in the whole Western World because people have forgotten what was obvious in previous mellenia. Woman are too picky and wait for the wrong men (who often don't exist anyway) and men are too picky or never develop what they need to attract woman.



This is all just very generally put though.

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