As Christians is it wrong to desire and be with someone that we're attracted to?

Posted : 17 Jul, 2014 01:20 PM

I really liked that question you put out there on the blog and wanted to just talk/write about it if I could.

To me the definitions of "love" and "like" in this society are suppose to be shallow. What I mean is that most of our desires are shaped by TV/Media and Society,

Music Videos, etc..



The same society that often times (more likely than not) has there beliefs steeped in ungodliness. We are knowingly or unknowingly

shaped by the ungodly or godless world we live in.



So, long story short, when we are born into a world that is predicated on beliefs from Satan then we would have a non godly view of

relationships to begin with. 1 Foot in the dating hellfire so to speak...



So for example, say you were born again in your late teens/twenty's/thirties, etc. Your formative years have already been shaped

by this society and your standard of "beauty" or "attraction" would have been set. So when you become a christian and, for example

read the book of Hosea.



How, when God commands the Prophet Hoseas to marry a prostitute named Gomer and after time she would cheat on Hosea over

and over (because she was a prostitue that didn't really know God) and God would go on to command Hosea to love her and take her

back. (http://www.gotquestions.org/Hosea-marry-prostitute.html). This website goes into a lot of details in how it was, although real and happened in history, is a

type of metaphor.



Hosea's relationship was a like a symbol, as he was a prophet of God and represented isreal and would basically play out the relationship between

God vs. Us(unfaithful) - Hosea vs. Gomer(unfaithful).



So my point in bringing this (above) example up is that I think about a married couple and even-though they might have experienced the very rare: "love at first site" or been each others "soul-mates". There would come a time or times or many times, that satan would test this relationship, especially if it was God based. With the sunshine comes the rain and it's predicted that there would be many seasons of life between them when they both would not feel "in love" or even in "like" for each other.



Arguments, silent treatments, jealousy, fear of infidelity. I can imagine that if 2 people are completely satisfied with each others looks/attitude, etc. How long would it be before another women/man tries to split the two with lies/flirtation/gossip or the like? Because if your looks are there and your attitude is there, that would make you attractive to many other people. And not everyone excepts a gentle "no thanks" or "not interested". I think they make alot of TV shows surrounding what happens when people try to break other people up because of jealousy/envy. So its fair to say both of them would need to be strong. Demons/Evil Spirited People would test and try this kind of relationship.



So the outward appearance or "my type" would not last the test of time because the type of character and fortitude that both people would need to have would

be tested beyond the shallow externals or temporary courting phase when you are just getting to know each other (first 1-3 years or so.)



But this type of character preparing would not be the "worlds" focus. I trust that the world has tried/tries to focus me on the lust of a relationship and not the long term struggles and character building that it takes to keep it together. Or more importantly the forgiveness/patience it takes to move pass hurtful mistakes that we ALL make. Hours/Years of prayers for the other person and yourself to help overcome issues that look like a "deal breaker" is usually silent on the TV programming/media/society were we spend alot of our time.



I think the worst thing was the "night in shinning armor, or the luther vandross/love songs type of dream that so many women have because perfection only is with God, man can only make less mistakes but will one day hurt you, even if by accident. 2 Corinthians 5:16 "Wherefore henceforth know we no man after the flesh: yea, though we have known Christ after the flesh, yet now henceforth know we him no more."

Jeremiah 17:9.



But it's that is how we were created, to error and work to get to the kingdom of Heaven. Perfection would only make our spiritual life void and heaven would not be a prize/goal. It would be a "given".



I think both people need to be generally attracted to each other but that should not hold them back from getting to know someone. Also if your looking for someone you have to be praying about it, so that God can show you a person that your spirit needs, not just your flesh.