Leanne1989
If our relationship does not point to Christ,I don't want it.
- Gender
- Female | 34
- Country
- Philippines
- City
- Sto. Domingo
- State
- Albay
- Height
- 5'4"
- Last Login Date
- Click here to learn more
- Age
- 34
- Eye Color
- Black
- Body Type
- Slender
- Hair Color
- Brown
- Ethnicity
- Asian
- Denomination
- Non-Denominational
- Looking For
- A Marriage Partner
- Church Name
- Jesus Is Lord(JIL)
- Church Attendance
- Every week
- Church Raised In
- Do you drink?
- No
- Smoker
- No
- Willing to relocate?
- Possibly, who knows
- Marital Status
- Single
- Do you have children?
- No
- Do you want children?
- Want Children
- Education Level
- 4 Yr College Degree
- My Profession
- Government
- Interests
- Praying for a relationship that is authored and carefully knitted by the ONE who holds the eternity.A man who will be patient enough to wait for the right things at the right time with me.A man who always acknowledge God's goodness over his lives.
- About Me
-
I was born in a Christian home, they raised me the best they could in the Lord. We would regularly attend church on Sunday. At a young age they planted a seed in my heart. I was taught about GOD.
But despite my upbringing I chose to live my life on my own terms. I am blessed to have hard working parents. Even though they are with me physically and provided the things I needed there was that void in my heart. Growing up I deeply longed for their attention and love.
I was 10 when I first got exposed to pornography from a friend. And so that was the start of a huge addiction for me. I thought love is genderless so I identified myself as bisexual and had girlfriends as well as boyfriends. I was 13 years old when I had my first relationship with a girl. The desire to be loved led me to give in to the desire of my flesh. I had my first same sex experience at age of 14. I became a "Sunday-Christian" and lived a double-life.
In May of 2005 my mom was diagnosed with stage 3 lung cancer. In these dark moments I drew myself to GOD in prayer and remained hopeful,even as treatment options ran out for my mother. The inevitable happened, my mother died 4 months after the diagnosis. It was the most excruciating thing I've ever had to endure. In my moms passing my world was shattered, so shattered! My faith slowly faded. I stopped going to church and I neglect to communicate with GOD through prayer. I deliberately turn my back to God.
My bitterness and anger started with my dad when I found out that he is having an ellicit affair few months after my mom passed away. Back then I've lived my life in a rebellious way. I started drinking alcohol and I become a smoker. While I was in it I am having fun but not having any joy.This went on and got even worse.I learned self gratification with the influenced of my ex.
I felt heartbroken and developed a strong anger towards my dad when he brought my stepmom in our house to live with us without asking me and the rest of my siblings how we feel about that matter.
For years my usual response would be to lock myself in my room because I'm not interested in connecting with them. I also have thoughts of running away and wanting to die.
The feeling of emptiness in my heart got worse than usual. One night I cried so hard and as tears started to fall from my eyes I have this question in mind "Where is my life going"? The first turning point of my life happened. I found myself in a situation where I needed help when I failed to commit suicide. I knew at that time It was God in His love and protection who did not allow me to fall in that sin. It was at this moment that I find myself reconnecting with GOD. I started attending church after several years of running away from HIM.
I thought I had made a commitment to JESUS then. But soon enough I was back with my vices and immoral relationship. I did not realize that there were many issues in my heart that I have not fully surrendered to HIM yet. The wild lifestyle continued but at the end of the day I felt a very deep emptiness inside me.In order to fill that void I engage in a sinful lifestyle to the fullest extent that I could. It's kind of a cycle, I could still have fun but was never really satisfied.
It took sickness, for GOD to call my attention to confront me and called me to lay off everything that I drew my life upon.
During the pandemic I have a sudden loss of taste and smell. I have so much thoughts in my mind that I can't barely sleep at night. I felt very anxious about it yet I'm ashamed to seek help from GOD, because at that moment I'm having an immoral relationship.
Crying out in desperation I open my heart to GOD and pleaded for help. I fell on my knees and cried out to GOD, asking for healing and not to be a covid positive.My prayer were actually answered! Indeed GOD heard the cry of my heart! GOD is amazing because my senses are back the moment I stepped on the quarantine facility and got negative result during rapid testing.
Little did I know GOD is doing something to take away everything that caused me to forget who really loved me first. After 2 weeks my girlfriend that time ended our relationship. I found myself questioning my worth. But this time I didn't want to go back to the dark world. I wanted GOD to step in, to take control of everything I was feeling and doing. I started to read my dusty Bible again.
Eventually I found myself attending worship service online. For the second time the Lord spoke to me so gently and lovingly. Upon hearing the message on Sunday service, I burst in tears and become so overwhelmed with the love that God had for me. At that moment I ask for HIS forgiveness, I surrendered everything and asked HIM to fill me with HIS over flowing love. After that I felt the peace that I have never experience in my whole life.
It was also during that time the LORD confronted me that I have unforgiveness in my heart towards my father and other people.
It is by HIS overflowing love that the former pleasures of life no longer seem to measure up. As GOD pours out HIS love to me,I find myself renewed and restored.I finally started to feel HIS works in my life.
CHRIST opened my eyes and change my desires one by one. By God's grace, I am now living a life smoke free and alcohol free. I'm free from my addiction in pornography and self-gratification.
I opened my heart fully and focused only on JESUS. I am pursuing a "life of purity" with a promise to GOD that should he have a husband for me,our first kiss will be at the altar.
Because of the love that I felt from Jesus. I am able to extend forgiveness to my father and all who have done me wrong. I was able to reconnect with my family especially my dad. My relationship with them has grown closer. In the present we are doing family devotion every Saturday where in I have the previllage to share the word of God with them.
My life is far from perfect. But God is faithful and HIS love and Lordship strengthens me. I hold onto Philippians 1:6 " For I am confident of this very thing,that HE who began a good work in you will perfect it untill the day of Christ Jesus."
I'm KL once enslaved to the desires of the flesh now redeemed and renewed with Christ. To GOD be all the Glory.
- First Date
- Attend church to praise and worship Jesus.
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