Thread: Is there such a thing as a guy being too honest?
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Is there such a thing as a guy being too honest?
Posted : 4 Aug, 2012 12:56 PM
Hello lady's and gentleman. I got a complex problem for those women who love a good challenge. I'm always hearing women tell me that they want an honest and nice man. And in my book honesty has to be one of the greatest virtues of godly character -- expescially in this modern age. I don't have a problem getting a woman. It's keeping them. See, in my past relationships I have enjoyed getting to honor God (because God hates lairs) and being extremely honest and upfront with my long list of ex-girlfriends. It's not that I spill my guts out too them lol. But each woman besides telling me that I'm the greatest Guy they've ever been with, has also told me their reasons for leaving and there all along the lines of me being too honest. So, I got to wonder a few things... Is there any woman who really does cherish honesty and not just say they do but back it up with action? Should I stop being honest towards women, because I see other guys who seem to have no character at all have more luck at making into a longer term relationships and marriage then us righteous men do. ( I'll admit that a lot of that has to do with them getting a woman pregnant before marriage. But my point is there.. it works and if you have to trick someone into marriage these days then what's the point ) I also think about a larger perspective. In a Lady gaga inspired, short skirt world -- where seeing a woman or man naked is just a click away: Is there anyone that want's to be valued, wants to be different from the world, and wants to holy. Enough to please God By acting on that desire with every step they make. I see so many women say on their profile's how happy they are in a world that the Bible says is ruled by the devil until Christ returns. Their number one quality that they are looking for in a man. "That he makes her laugh." Entertainment? Really? I'm honestly feeling kind of defeated right now because no one seems to get the bigger picture from God's perspective. Anyway, God bless and thanks to any opinions that come my way. If your confused what I'm asking, " Is there such a thing as being too honest and if there is, how much should I lie about? Because telling people the truth isn't working.. they seem to want some kind of disneyland princess experience... which I don't know how that's going to help in a marriage but whatever lol.
17But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, and easy to be entreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy. 18And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace. James 3: 17,18
Who is honest let alone truthful, I dare to say none. When the young man asked Jesus, good teacher, what must I do to enter the kingdom?
Jesus answered, "No man is good." Jesus was a man...and He said no man is good. (No man without God's help is my conclusion here.)
Therefore I suggest that if Jesus says no man is good, no man is completely honest let alone too honest. If anyone thinks that they are too honest they are lying to themselves and anyone listening:)
But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and ALL LIARS, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
Crayola, I never accused anyone of being a lair nor did I ever say anyone is doomed. I'm not a judge but I am told to rebuke something when it doesn't line up to scripture. The only things I put under the microscope, was myself and things that bother me about the kind of relationships our culture is producing. How they lack honesty. There's a reason why the U.S. Census is saying that 54% and raising of all marriages end in devorce. Why according to usetoday and more census studies say Cohabitation is replacing dating and even some marriages. (http://www.usatoday.com/life/lifestyle/2005-07-17-cohabitation_x.htm)
So, if I'm saying anything besides asking a few simple questions about myself and the role of being honest in a relationship. it could be seen as a statement that our culture is filled with lies and we are not where we was 90 years ago. We've declined morally And In my opinion it's destroying the prosperity of this nation.
it doesn't have to look like a end of the world, Doomsday film to end a nation. We are "one nation under God" that's not on our dollar because the founding fathers put it there.. In fact, The federal reserve didn't exist back then, they wanted our nation to remain on the Gold standard. That saying came about during the "new deal" because because they wanted something meaning and like Israel in the old testament. we are in and under a covenant with God.
In Deuteronomy 28 (which parallels Leviticus 26), God describes in great detail what would happen to the nation if they obeyed His words, and what would happen if they disobeyed Him. Verses 2-14 point out the specific blessings for obedience. They would include food in abundance (verses 3-6, 8), safety from enemies (verse 7), healthy children and abundant livestock and produce (verses 11-12). These blessings would also enable the nation to give to many other nations, without having to borrow from them (verse 12). All in all, the obedient to him would become a "holy" people (verse 9), "the head of all nations and not the tail" (verse 13)(what we call a superpower).
On the other hand, disobedience would bring about severe punishment. And that is just what happened with ancient Israel and is happening with us. We know from history that ancient Israel and Judah later suffered some of the specific curses listed, including military attacks, when the Assyrians and the Babylonians besieged and conquered Samaria and Jerusalem and enslaved the two nations. But we know, too, that an even greater period of devastating punishment is still ahead of us. The Great Tribulation of the end time will be worse than any calamity or holocaust of the past (see Matthew 24:21; Jeremiah 30:7; Daniel 12:1; Deuteronomy 31:29). It will afflict modern Judah, i.e., the Jewish people, and the modern descendants of ancient Israel, and it'sallies especially the United States (Manasseh) and Great Britain along with other Commonwealth nations, such as Canada, Australia and New Zealand (Ephraim). God will use for this punishment the dreadful curses spelled out in Deuteronomy 28 as well as military attacks and enslavement at the hands of a new global superpower, the resurrected Roman Empire, called "Babylon" in the book of Revelation.
In particular, there will be famine due to food shortages and destruction through locusts, worms, bees dying out and other natural disasters, unhealthy livestock, and droughts (verses 17-18, 23-24, 38-40, 42). The people of the land will become incurably sick, both physically and mentally (verses 21-22, 27-28, 34-35, 59-62). They will be conquered by a foreign power and become slaves-some of them will be brought as captives of war to distant lands, never to see their country again (verses 32-33, 36, 41, 49 ff., 68; compare Isaiah 11:11). During this time some will even resort to cannibalism (Deuteronomy 28:52-57). This actually occurred before during the siege of Jerusalem in A.D. 70 as it did at other times (compare 2 Kings 6:24-30), and it will occur again-only this time, it will be much more severe and widespread. Finally, the people of the nation will be scattered much like what happen to Israel and Judah "among all peoples.... and there you shall serve other gods.... And among those nations you will find no rest.... You shall fear day and night, and have no assurance of life" (verses 64-66).
God brinhe such terrible punishment on disobedient nations to teach them a much-needed lesson. Of those to whom much is given, much is required-and punishment is worse for those who fail to do right when they ought to know better (compare Luke 12:47-48). Israel, Judah, and because America was built by the same God. They all was blessed and are blessed with divine aid and unparalleled wide access to Scripture, they should have been "holy" nations-an example to the rest of the world. But Israel ended up actually sinking lower than the gentiles (other nations) in their rebellion against God (see 2 Chronicles 33:9). That is why God will use the "worst of the Gentiles" to punish them (Ezekiel 7:24). But some, while in captivity, came to their senses and repented (stopped being disobedient), and God accepted them, freed them and brought them back to the land which their fathers possessed, to prosper there (Deuteronomy 30:1-5, 9), while placing "all these curses on your enemies and on those who hate you, who persecuted you" (verse 7).
So point being, America is in decline for it's disobedience. we don't value God's viewpoint on life -- the killing of unborn babies. we don't value his standards on marriages -- the high divorce rate and the gay marriage debate (there shouldn't be a debate. When God is so clear on that subject.) As a nation don't care about teaching the bible-- it's not allowed in public school along with prayer. We don't care about corruption -- the banks got Bailed out so that investors didn't lose their money but good paying home owners, college students, families.. didn't and that not fair to take from the commonwealth and give to the rich nor is it fair the other way around. The bible talks a great deal of money and fairness. The rich shouldn't be making an average of 300% more then everyone else. That's the kind of corruption God is against because what makes them more important then you or me? -- nothing. nothing makes me more important then you or you more important then me.
which lets me deal with the next statement you made crayola. I want you to know that
Romans 3:23 all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, (So your not alone nor are you condemned)
The godly may trip seven times, but they will get up and try again. But one disaster is enough to overthrow the wicked. (So don't quit trying, no one said it would be easy to walk by faith but it's worth it.)
Proverbs 6:16-19 There are six things the LORD hates, 16 seven that are detestable to him: haughty eyes, 17 a lying tongue, hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked schemes, 18 feet that are quick to rush into evil, a false witness who pours out lies 19 and a person who stirs up conflict in the community.
( Arrogant Eyes: Don�t look at others and hold yourself higher because you know more truths then they do, or because you have a gift that another does not. They could look at you the same way. We are not all the same. If you feel the need for arrogance, or to be arrogant, look at what about that person makes you feel arrogant, and turn to your heart and ask, �Why does this bother ME?� Then fix it and the arrogance will be gone. If you don�t fix it, you will struggle as you try to, or choose to walk without arrogance.
John responded, �Master, we saw someone driving out demons in Your name, and we tried to stop him because he does not follow us.� �Don�t stop him,� Jesus told him, �because whoever is not against you is for you.� �Luke 9:49-50
A Lying Tongue: We aren�t to be saying things as truths in order to get ahead; or, to be seen as better than others are; or, to cover something shameful. We also don�t want to speak untruths purposely to appear smarter or more holy. But that is not how you learned about the Messiah, assuming you heard Him and were taught by Him, because the truth is in Jesus: You took off your former way of life, the old man that is corrupted by deceitful desires; Since you put away lying, speak the truth, each one to his neighbor, because we are members of one another. �Ephesians 4:20-21, 25
Hands That Shed Innocent Blood: Destroying innocent or blameless people by killing their will, their dignity, their gift given by God, or them. By putting people down in these.areas as harmless as this one may seem, it allows for worse things to come in. (This led to Saul�s desire to kill David. It started out emotionally and then it transformed into physically.)
Saul was furious and resented this song. �They credited tens of thousands to David,� he complained, �but they only credited me with thousands. What more can he have but the kingdom?� So Saul watched David jealousy from that day forward. The next day an evil spirit from God took control of Saul, and he began to rave inside the palace. �1Samual 18:8-10
A Heart That Plots Wicked Schemes: Speaking, thinking, wishing, spiteful, hurtful thoughts -- by doing any of these only feeds the flesh. We need to train our hearts to purposely practice kindness, gentleness, etc. (Galatians 5:22-23). Otherwise we move nowhere.
Though they intend to harm you and devise a wicked plan, they will not prevail. �Psalms 21:11
Feet Eagar to Run to Evil: Going to places you know God isn�t in the middle of: TV, books, friends, parties, drugs, booze. Instead of running to Him you run to something �evil� for comfort. Take time to go to God and get right and then seek out what made you run, or want to run.
Finally be strengthened by the Lord and by His vast strength. Put on the armor of God so that you can stand against the tactics of the Devil. For our battle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the world powers of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavens. �Ephesians 6: 10-13
Lying Witness Who Gives False Testimony: You don�t know or understand the truths from God, but are spreading around untruths to others and not allowing them the right to grow. Teach your spouse (understood that �spouse� also meant children and/or family) what God shows you and the one listening needs to accept it as truth.
He answered them, �The secret of the kingdom of God has been granted to you, but to those outside, everything comes in parables so that they may look and look, yet not perceive; they may listen and listen, yet not understand;otherwise, they might turn back�and be forgiven.�
He also said, �Is a lamp brought in to be put under a basket or under a bed? Isn�t it to be put on a lampstand? For nothing is concealed except to be revealed, and nothing hidden except to come to light. If anyone has ears to hear, he should listen! Then He said to them, �Pay attention to what you hear. By the measure you use, it will be measured and added to you. For to the one who has, it will be given, and from the one who does not have, even what he has will be taken away.� �Mark4:11-12, 21-25
One Who Stirs Up Trouble Among Brothers: Don�t gossip maliciously! Don�t tell a person that someone they know is doing something on purpose for your own purpose -- that you know it will upset, bother or anger the person you are telling. If you do not know if it will bother them or not, even if you think it won�t, don�t say it if you INTEND to get a malicious reaction from the one you are telling. It will or could cause them to then sin in anger.If the one you are �gossiping� about is doing wrong �go to them and help them.
For we hear that there are some among you who walk irresponsibility, not working at all, but interfering with the work [of others]. Now we command and exhort such people, by the Lord Jesus Christ, that quietly working, they may eat their own bread. Brothers, do not grow weary in doing good. And if anyone does not obey our instruction in this letter, take note of that person; don�t associate with him, so that he may be ashamed. Yet don�t treat him as an enemy, but warn him as a brother. �2Thesaloanians 3:11-15
I didn't write this explaination of the seven things God hates but I recalled it and know as long as I have the copyright the writer doesn't mind me using it because it says so on his site (http://www.divorcehope.com/7seventhingsgodhates.htm)
All Rights Reserved, � Copyright 2009 by Stephen Gola)
anyway, I hope you understand now that your not doomed but if you think your a lair. pray that God helps with that and repent in him. what I do whenever I feel my flesh or realize I am about to sin. I stand back for a second and test myself towards scripture. because l remember 2 Timothy 3:16-17
16 All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, 17 so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.
God bless you crayola, and thanks for sharing your opinion. sorry it's so long but your statement even if it may just be mocking me or sarcasm put a lot of thoughts on my heart. I also hope you not hurt at all by my opinion or the biblical passages that have used to helped formed my thoughts as I'm sure they they help everyone who listens and obeys them or puts them into use in daily life. As for the end times part of my response that I shared, it's meant to build you and others up. NOT to scare and make people afraid but to build up the righteous because whenever God allows These things to happen-- we have proof that our God who told us in advance that it would happen -- is in control and we can stand on our faith in his word. Which says, Jeremiah 29:11-- For I know the plans I have for you,� declares the LORD, �plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
@touchedtwice "Who is honest let alone truthful, I dare to say none. W the young man asked Jesus, good teacher, what must to enter the kingdom? Jesus answered, "No man is good." Jesus was a man.. He said no man is good. (No man without God's help conclusion here.) Therefore I suggest that if Jesus says no man is good, man is completely honest let alone too honest. If any thinks that they are too honest they are lying to them and anyone listening:)"
Thanks for you opinion, I value that you took the time to share it.. I also love that scripture, when I talk about being too honest. I was thinking of righteous men and women as a whole. As I stated before my honesty get me and others who were honest into a lot of trouble, This chat forum question is a perfect example. I've been as suggested a lair a few times and been told I have the wrong tone and timing. Basically, I'm being painted a pretty bad guy in peoples thoughts, let I have not attacked anyone. I'm even getting both good and not so good private messages about this on my profile. I get into a relationship and they first love my honesty but when I start to talk about my flaws or viewpoints -- they leave due to my honesty. if I didn't tell tell them about my flaws or viewpoints then I wouldn't be honest but the relationship would last long. because people can't count things against you that they don't know about you. So, when someone is honest enough, that it causes problems in their life. I call that being too honest. John the Baptist was honest about Christ coming let his honesty got him beheaded. Christ was honest about being the messiah let he got crucified over a lying murder none the less. how many men and women have preached the gospel with all honesty and let be hated by the world for it. I am not perfect.. In fact, I have many flaws and I stumble often. which I rejoice because I realize that I need Christ and his word. I never said I was perfect nor have I attacked anyone. let look at view count and the responses. I have no doubts that the devil is trying to destroy my credibility, my reputation, or stir rumors about me. Let the only things I've done is ask about honesty to my brothers and sisters in Christ. I stated how I feel and what I already know in scripture and besides a few the majority is very hostile. This is a community of Christians so it shouldn't be a surprise if someone is asking "where's God's higher standard of living set apart from the world. If we are the body.. then why do we look like the world and why do we use the world's standard of happiness and not God's standard of holiness? Why do we misuse and twist God's grace to make living in sin okay? It's not okay but where are the calls for repentance and why is it rarely talked about?
So, I hope that clears up that I'm not asking these questions to deceive anyone. That's why I'm using bible passages to back up my thinking because God is not a lair and "the righteous person faces many troubles, but the LORD comes to the rescue each time." Psalm 34:19
How can he rescue me. if his sword and shield is not used in what I do and say. Also for another reason completely -- we are the only bible some people will ever read.. So, I'm hopeful that the seeds planted here will encourage others to read scriptures more.
Hosea 4:6 my people are destroyed from lack of knowledge. "Because you have rejected knowledge, I also reject you as my priests; because you have ignored the law of your God, I also will ignore your children.
Psalm 119:153 Look upon my suffering and deliver me, for I have not forgotten your law.
Proverbs 10:21 The lips of the righteous nourish many, but fools die for lack of judgment.
Isaiah 5:13 Therefore my people will go into exile for lack of understanding; their men of rank will die of hunger and their masses will be parched with thirst.
Jeremiah 5:4 I thought, "These are only the poor; they are foolish, for they do not know the way of the LORD, the requirements of their God.
Ezekiel 44:23 They are to teach my people the difference between the holy and the common and show them how to distinguish between the unclean and the clean.
So that's some reasons why you should test everything in scriptures
Forgive me if I'm ignorant or if I fail at reading comprehension. I understand this passage, but where does it say "God hates liars"? I still didn't get that meaning.
I believe God has consequences for each sin we commit. There are consequences for each good deed we do as well... albeit good consequences generally. I think we confuse consequences with God's emotion and/or "hatred." I believe we are punished because He loves us, NOT because he hates us.
So once again, I just don't understand how the passage you quoted or the Original Poster's comment about "God hates liars" have any type of credence.
I read the first half of your previous post (I didn't have time to read it all and write a response). However, I didn't mean to make it seem like you were judging anyone SPECIFICALLY. I understand we should rebuke that which doesn't "lineup" with the scriptures, but that is why I challenged your quote that "God hates liars." It's one thing to rebuke and another to completely fabricate, which is something that unless there is evidence to suggest "God hates liars" I think you may have done. So I guess I was rebuking that comment as it doesn't "lineup" to what I have studied and learned from the bible.
I understand that you was taught differently amd I have nothing against you. I didn't make anything up but your free to think that I have writen...
:stop: my statement that you have a problem with comes from the bible it's self.:stop: Proverbs 6:16-19 says
"there are six things the Lord hates- no seven things He detests: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, hands that kill the innocent, a heart that plots evil, feet that race to do wrong, a false witness who pours out lies, a person who sows discord in a family."
I even give a detailed description above from another Theologian that goes deeper into that passage. The truth is a lot of work to find out. So much work that most just don't care enough to go though the work to find it out. We are a lazy generation and if something seems too hard we just quit. So I hope you have emjoyed our talk about this because I have and it has taught and blessed me a lot.
While we probably were taught differently, the bible and the passage you just posted only articulates God's displeasure of sins. It in no way, shape, OR form says what you quoted which was, "God hates liars."
I don't know if you're familiar with the saying, "hate the sin but love the sinner." God doesn't like when we sin but he doesn't hate us for sinning. Perhaps you should revisit John 3:16 which gives us a taste of how much God loves us even though we sin. That is the entire point of Christ's atonement and the importance of being saved.
