Ok, I'm not really asking, heh heh. I just recently felt burdened to share what I've learned about some men, with women who maybe have felt similar to the way I felt before. I figure if I post it in the Ask a Woman section maybe someone who had my same problems and questions will find some answers.
It all started two long years ago when I had my first boyfriend. I was 20. To make a long story short, my boyfriend broke up with me. The breakup was very one-sided however, because I was still very much in love with him and sure he was in love with me. Finally, a good friend of mine demanded that I watch the movie "He's Just Not That Into You" and it helped me put him in the past and move on.
Since then, that concept has saved me from so much heartache. A guy may like you a bit, he may be into you, but he's just not that into you. So its good to keep it in mind. Say for example, you're at a dance, a man you like looks at you, and then asks another woman to dance. Before watching that movie, I would think, "He's just trying to make me jealous, so I'll like him more", or "He likes me so much that he's too shy". But the truth is, if a guy really wants what you offer he'll go for it, he'll call you, he'll stick his neck out for you. And all his other excuses for not showing up, not remembering to etc etc, not calling can be boiled down to those six words.
I don't know. It's saved me soooooo much heartache just remembering "he's just that into me". It makes things so much clearer, so much more black and white. And then you can go on and find someone worth your time.
Its like, you're not going to have a relationship with some who isn't that into you or doesn't love you, because you need to save your love for someone who does. It's just that simple.
I've got to go to work so I don't have a lot of time, but...
Let's start out here with the story of Ruth :winksmile: ...okay.
1st of all, when you're dealing with GOD's plan for your life, and the man that GOD has prepared and chosen for you, there are many, many, many ways through which God may choose to bring that man into your life.
SO...it is VERY important that you do not attempt to tie God's hands behind HIS back as to how HE must work in your life, for your own good in order to get your attention ;) = lean not on your own understanding (including the understanding of "He's Just Not That Into You"), but lean instead on every Word that comes from the Mouth of God!
2nd of all, if the Lord is truly working in a man's life, it is VERY likely that the man will be busy sticking his neck out for the Lord instead of taking his eyes off the Lord to stick his neck out for you - which is a really good thing, not a bad thing.
Consider Ruth's interaction with Boaz. In this case, it is actually Ruth who sticks her neck out a number of times, and that by faith while "allowing" herself to be directed by God through Naomi, her mother in law - while all the while Boaz attempts to treat Ruth with the utmost respect from a distance, not even considering himself as a potential pursuer = in other words, Boaz isn't looking at Ruth unto SELF, which is what motivates most men to pursue the women they pursue.
My times up, but I'll check on this later :toomuch:
For now this is a sufficient amount of homework to ponder :rolleyes:
Hey, I'm trying, but my neck's having a hard time stretching all the way across the Pacific...Hahaha
Jokes aside, I do think you're onto something here. You have to be careful not to swing too far in the other direction though. It doesn't matter how into the girl the guy is, if she plays too hard to get, he's just going to give up. Is it too much to expect the guy to ask you out? Of course not. But should you be expecting him to show up at your house with two dozen roses, a boom box, and a white horse just to get a coffee date with you? Heck no!
Mydreamtime33, I actually love the story of Ruth � one of those romances which can be read with grandparent�s discretion. :excited: Clearly, God�s ways are not our own. Which proves your point.
I�m not crazy about my new Eureka. The only thing I�m really crazy about is God. In each situation you got to look to the Lord. But everybody deserves the best� friends are like elevators they either take you up or down� as the old saying goes. And this applies to everyone, both guys and girls.
Maybe you really are onto something here Live. But for the sake of exploring puzzle pieces, let's try putting a slight twist on this new Eureka of yours. Let's refocus the focal point of that movie and change it to..."He's Just Not That Into Christ".
Or for that matter... "He or She's Just Not That Into Christ".
Because without the Spirit of Christ dwelling within someone...it really doesn't matter how "into" you they may "seem" to be. In the end according to 1st Corinthians 13, WE will have gained nothing.
If we accept the "appearance" of love / worship / praise from another who isn't loving / worshiping / praising Christ, then we are in fact accepting and enjoying from that person what belongs to God alone. We are literally enjoying that person placing us before God. And if God truly loves us, then HE's for certain going to cause that relationship to leave a very nasty taste in our mouths...
I don't even want to get into this... it opens a big Pandora's box. As much as I like clear and simple, the only thing that's simple and clear is God, the rests all a big tumble-jumble...soooo my confidence is in God. And He's got my back. Praise the Lord!
I really agree with what you said though, don't try to play God by allowing yourself to take the place of God in someone else's life.
Thanks for the post and I threw the same topic in this forum a year ago and did the same thing u did, mentioning the "He's just not that into u" movie. And some people (esp guys since I posted in Ask a Guy section) gave their opinions and honestly I didn't really get the clarification whether that movie is telling the truth, half truth, or even a lie. Me myself would want to believe the message the movie is trying to deliver since it's the easiest thing to be standarized. But then I asked some other guys, some type of guys said that the movie is so true, some other type of guys said that the movie isn't applicable to all situations as some guys are shy or they don't want to scare the woman off by being too obvious in chasing the woman.
Personal experiences telling me that if the guy is really into me, he will ensure that I get the message of him chasing me, which I can simply say he's becoming very clingy. Other guys who aren't really acting clingy around me, usually they are interested but not really into me, just like what the message the movie is trying to give.
But Tulip did give a good point by running slow. And I agree with Mydream as well on Proverbs3:5.
So now let's say no guideline of "He's just not that into you" movie, what we women should do to avoid heartbroken? :ROFL:
I was really head over heels for a young lady in Indonesia, we had it going on! She even promised to send me a banana tree, but it never came. That is when I remembered those six little words :"she's really not that into me." So after a few tear stained pillow cases, I sadly had to call it off.
I have family in Miami that can hook you up with some plantain growing trees and some coconuts . . . I know you had your heart set on that banana tree but just don't have any available right now!
Hmmm.... I like to eat a banana on my way to work and even though I am not female, I do possess primitive multi tasking skills; like peeling and eating a banana while I drive. However, I think it may be beyond my mutti tasking abilities to crack and eat a coconut while driving to work in the morning.
