Author	Thread: Issues and Problems with This and Other Sites
Admin	Issues and Problems with This and Other Sites Posted : 2 Apr, 2011 11:55 PM Something must be horribly wrong with me. I only wish someone had the courage to tell me what that was. I figure it's something to do with my looks and/or something in my profile that has scared women off like a crucifix reflecting sunlight into a vampire's face, complete with the hissing and eye-covering. I say this because I NEVER *EVER* get a response from any message I send a woman on any site, unless it's one laced with flirty, ego-stroking compliments, and even then the conversation never goes any further because they're too far away (only ladies hundreds of miles away and beyond seem to be capable or interested in responding to me). Sometimes, they don't even have the decency to respond to that and say 'thank you'. I guess they're just too used to being complimented. This is supposed to be a web site devoted to CHRISTIANS, yes? Hmm... well to me at least, that means that courtesy and grace should be among the traits shown by all here. When you contact someone, even if they're not interested, it's only respectful to honor their stepping out with a graciously-worded 'no thank you'. If they only take the time to flirt and compliment you, it's humble to say 'thank you' and no more ought to be expected from either party. Does any of that sound unreasonable? It doesn't to me. I look at this way: if I am so much as winked at, I will honor and respect that person's expressing themselves to me, irregardless of whether or not I'm interested. I figure they made themselves somewhat vulnerable -- even on a web site such as this -- to tell me that they found me interesting. So, the very least I can do is to gently acknowledge them. Do any of you do the same thing? I'm willing to bet almost none of you do. Why? (I ask this more rhetorically, since I will have deleted my account by the time any of you read this.) The answer I usually get is, "Well, if I'm not interested in a guy, why am I obligated to respond?" Because, you inconsiderate snoot, that man stepped out and took a chance, making himself slightly vulnerable, that's why. Responding to him is so thoroughly respectful and gracious on your part. Why does this need to be spelled out? Why is this almost automatic for me and no one else? And, I know women aren't the only ones guilty, MEN, are they? You "brothers in the Lord" do the same frickin' thing to the ladies. I guess I expect more from my fellow Christians. How naive of me. One or two not responding is mildly annoying. But, when dozens and dozens do the same thing, with NO break AT ALL, EVER, in the pattern, across 8 or 9 dating sites over a year and a half, you get a complex. Well, that complex has bred total discouragement. I could see if my intro messages were obnoxious or perverse or badly worded. But, as you can see, I have a good command of the english language and I am not disrespectful or perverse. I *am* a flirt, as a few here can attest, but I just don't believe that's the problem here. In fact, a message laced with flattering compliments seems to be the only thing that gets a woman typing. Hmmm... Lord, I've had quite enough. No eligible and interested women in the real world... none in the much larger netterworld. I need the gift of celibacy, please. Post Reply
View Profile History	Issues and Problems with This and Other Sites Posted : 4 Apr, 2011 05:43 AM Shalom brother keithy first what come's to mind here is one shouldn't necessarily invest their measure of faith in a web site but rather instead lean on Christ for our provisions -- for the bible say's Phil 4:6 In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God & that include's seeking His righteousness first then continue to wait on HIM Mt 6:33 But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you if it's God's will that He provide you a helpmate /wife then it will happen -- walk by faith not by sight & be patient Love you brother please don't dispair i'll pray for your need's this morning SHalom SHalom bro john Post Reply
missmelanie View Profile History	Issues and Problems with This and Other Sites Posted : 6 Apr, 2011 09:34 PM Well brother I would have to second all that you've said and you are not alone. I've been seeing this trend also Post Reply
View Profile History	Issues and Problems with This and Other Sites Posted : 8 Apr, 2011 07:30 PM There is nothing wrong with either of you. Don't let the fact that you're ignored on here make you feel bad about yourself. The way I see it, if they can't be courteous and respond to my messages, even if its to tell me they aren't interested, then I probably don't need them in my life anyway. There are a lot more potential mates out there than just the people on this site. Keep your head up. God has someone out there for you and he will reveal them in his timing. Post Reply