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The choice of a spouse for Christians who want to please the Lord
Posted : 1 Feb, 2022 06:29 PM
Criteria for choosing a spouse: the order of priorities to be considered.
How to recognize the spouse of my destiny? You met him, you fell in love. Over time, it becomes difficult to imagine your life without this person. So you decide to get married.
If you are a Christian, know that you skipped the steps in choosing your spouse and that you are exposing yourself to great disappointment if you do not do things in order. You don't marry for love, or at least not just for love.
So what are the criteria? What is GOD's order of priority?
1) The same faith.
Originally, marriage is a covenant instituted by God Himself. Thus, for the marriage to work well, one must follow the divine rules. If the person you want to marry is not converted, how are you going to be able to walk on the same principles? For example:
The woman you want to marry believes that submission is out of date. The man you want to marry believes that long-term loyalty is impossible.
Marrying a person who does not share your faith exposes you to daily friction in relation to certain life choices and the Word of God strongly advises against it:
Don't go yoke yourself up with unbelievers in a senseless way. How, indeed, could what is right be associated with what is bad? How could light unite with darkness? (2 Corinthians 6, 14 BFC)
2) The same vision.
Do two men walk together, but not agreed? (Amos 3, 3 Louis Segond)
When you get married, it is to share your whole life with this person. It is therefore important to have the same vision of life to have a happy union. It is therefore necessary to check precisely whether the vision and aspirations of this person correspond to yours.
How does this person view family? What is each partner's role? What is their view on parenting issues? Does she want to enroll the children in a strict distant boarding school, while for you it is necessary to have them close to you to have a complicit relationship? Does this person want to have a public and famous life while you are prefer anonymity?Does she want to live in a fixed place while you want to travel the world?Does she want a large family while you only want 2 children?What is his view of money? etc.
It is therefore necessary to discuss in detail all these aspects that will impact your lives to determined if you are going in the same direction. Also, what vision or calling have you received from God? The knowledge should help you to discern the type of spouse who is compatible with this vision or not. Therefore, you should not actively embark on the quest for a spouse without already knowing where you yourself are at in your relationship with God and with regard to His call on your life. By neglecting this important prerequisite, many have had to turn back after several months or years with the wrong person, with all that that implies such as disappointment, grief, heartbreak, etc. But the latter are even happier than those who found themselves in the wrong marriage, with the wrong spouse, and thus saw their glorious destiny shattered.
3) Love according to God.
Marriage is serious business. Before uniting your life with a person, you must be sure that you have understood what love really is and that you are capable of manifesting it. When things are going well it's easy, but when the storms of life come up, will the feelings hold?
You have to be able to tell the difference between desire, attraction, passion and true love.
People often make the mistake of getting married secretly hoping that the other will change this or that character trait over time. It's the best way to get frustrated. True love is unconditional; he accepts the other as he is today.
If it's her beauty that guides your choice, what will you do when time and motherhood leave their mark? If tragedy happens and he gets disfigured, can you stay true? There will always be another person with a better physique.
If it's his financial situation that guides your choice, the job he has and allows him to earn a good living, what will you do if he loses this job? What will you do if due to an accident he can no longer work? Will the love still be there?
The Word of God gives us a guide to true love:
Love is patient, it is full of kindness; love is not envious; love does not boast, it is not puffed up, 5it does nothing dishonest, it does not seek its own interests, it does not get angry, it does not suspect evil, it does not rejoice not unrighteousness, but he rejoices in the truth; He forgives everything, he believes everything, he hopes for everything, he supports everything. (1 Corinthians 13, 4-7 Louis Segond)
We therefore see that true love according to God is not a feeling. Indeed, it is the nature of feelings to change according to the circumstances of life. Love according to God is a commandment, it is a decision that you make and that you renew each day that God grants you the grace of the breath of life. It is the one that pushes you to dedicate your life to the happiness and fulfillment of others, without expecting anything in return. Be sure to serve him and make him happy, whether he reciprocates you or not. Are you ready to love this person that you are with or have your eyes on? Left God guide you in choosing the spouse of your destiny, so that you remain in His perfect will for your life.
The choice of spouse: an important decision
We now come to what is properly the main part of this book. We have learned that marriage is a gift from God, and that it has a very high value in His eyes. Marriage is something exceedingly beautiful, and God gave it to us for our blessing and for our joy. At the same time He thereby gives a great responsibility to the man and to the woman. Marriage cannot be taken lightly.
First, marriage is something that places an absolute obligation on us, an obligation that lasts for life. When you enter into a marriage, you can't go back. This shows the great importance of the choice of spouse. This choice has a value for the Christian that unfortunately he no longer has in modern society.
Secondly marriage is a marvelous figure which shows us what is of great value in the sight of God: Christ and His assembly. The earthly and temporal relationship in marriage is a picture of the glorious, heavenly, and eternal relationship between Christ and His assembly. This is what makes marriage so valuable.
Choosing the right spouse is of decisive importance for a happy life in marriage. It is a decision we can never make lightly—a decision we must not make according to our own ideas and thoughts—a decision we must make with the Lord—a decision to which we absolutely must take the necessary time and tranquility
After conversion, choosing a spouse is one of the most important decisions a man makes on this earth. It is heartbreaking to see many people, especially young people, looking for a spouse as if they were going to buy a car or a computer or a new pair of jeans. Dear young friends, choosing a spouse is an important decision. You thereby engage the whole orientation of your future life. Please don't take this decision lightly! this is a final decision!
4.1 - To marry or not to marry?
The desire to get married is an understandable desire. It is a desire that God places in the hearts of many of us. If you have this desire, it is a perfectly normal desire. We will come back to this. Perhaps one or other of my readers is wondering if in the end he should indeed get married, and if it is right to get married. God said it is not good for man to be alone. It's true. If you look at things from a purely natural point of view, we are missing something if we are left alone. Desiring a spouse is completely normal, it is a desire given by our Creator.
Be blessed in the name of Jesus Christ.
If you need to talk don't hesitate to contact me at:
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Read Carefully !!!!!
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