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Author Thread: Dealing with a Christian friend and their non-Christian spouse
jujumac86

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Dealing with a Christian friend and their non-Christian spouse
Posted : 21 Apr, 2010 04:28 PM

Hi all,



My best friend was dating this guy on and off for like 3 years. She is a Christian (usually struggling with her faith) and he was not at all. Their relationship was highly unstable and I did try to advise her against really committing herself to a guy who not only respected our Lord but who also (in my opinion) did not fully respect her. I did this with much sensitivity and tried to really pick key moments to bring this particular topic up. Usually I remained very encouraging.



Well, a few months ago she got engaged to this guy, much to everyone's surprise. In the process of her engagement she received various messages and sat through numerous conversations all stating that she was making a big mistake. Out of frustration she pushed the wedding date approximately 3 months after the engagement.



There's a LOT of drama I am not sharing relating to the above paragraph. Anyways, she asked me once if I thought she was making a mistake to marry a non-Christian and of course I said yes. We suddenly were not on good terms anymore (understandably so, who wants to hear that from your bff?)



Well, wedding plans continued, I tried my best to be supportive and encouraging. I mean, she knows my opinion so what she does with it is no longer in my jurisdiction. She is married, has been for about three weeks.



I don't know what to do. Now that she is married my next plan is to pray for her and help her improve her marriage and hopefully bring her spouse to Christ. But how? She says things about God being awesome but I just feel like it's kind of superficial in light of how she lives her life. What can I do???

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Dealing with a Christian friend and their non-Christian spouse
Posted : 21 Apr, 2010 10:54 PM

well you've warned her and she made the decision anyway, now she has to live with her decision at least for as long as her unbelieving spouse chooses to stay with her, if she wants to live the Biblical approach.

Just keep praying for her and her marriage and support them how you can as her friend. You never know, God may use this for good yet. I've got a friend who, despite being warned, married an unbeliever as well. This past year he wound up coming to salvation as she renewed her relationship with the Lord.

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willing2love66

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Dealing with a Christian friend and their non-Christian spouse
Posted : 8 May, 2010 02:49 AM

My sister married an Atheist. He's a nice guy but he doesn't make her happy. She married him for a better life. Her mental and physical health has deteriorated since getting married a year and a half ago. I fear that her marriage isn't Blessed. How's your friend doing?

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Dealing with a Christian friend and their non-Christian spouse
Posted : 13 May, 2010 03:52 PM

You all seem to be younger people here. The young are more likely to act in haste and make some kind of rash decsion. Young people sometimes do these things because they are insecure.

Best advice is pray.Dennis

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Dealing with a Christian friend and their non-Christian spouse
Posted : 16 May, 2011 03:51 PM

This reminds me of my now ex girlfriend amd here NO GOOD "ex".



She and I meet on here and talked for SEVEN months. She lied to me that the guy who turned out to be her ex was just her roommate. She and this guy have beeen on-and-off for all the time we talked and have known each other for 3 years. She is a Christian (but her lifestyle does not show it) and he "beleives in God". ( But I would not want to meet him in a dark street corner.) Like your friend their relationship was/is "highly unstable and I did try to advise her against really committing herself to a guy who not only respected our Lord but who also (in my opinion) did not fully respect her". I showed her such love and tried to help her, but she kept going back to him and now I know her true color and loyalty.



Well, a few months ago she got pregnant by him. She wanted to meet me for Christmas, but it never happend. Then in Feb. 2011 she got engaged to this guy and now wants nothing to do with me- "the boy of her dreams", as she once called me. In her engagement she moved to another State to be with this guy. Sdly unlike your friend my ex did not sit through "numerous conversations all stating that she was making a big mistake. Out of frustration she pushed the wedding date approximately 3 months after the engagement."- rather she did whatever she wanted and married the guy just a few months after I THOUGHT she was in a relationship with me.



There are part I am not sharing relating to my struggles with her. Like you said: "Anyways, she asked me once if I thought she was making a mistake to marry a non-Christian and of course I said yes. We suddenly were not on good terms anymore (understandably so, who wants to hear that from your bff?)". That is the SAME thing that happened to me.



I wonder if we are talking about the same person OR if such a thing happens often.



I am trying to get over this relationship and I know that that is a GOOD girl out there that God has for me.



The poster mentions: "She says things about God being awesome but I just feel like it's kind of superficial in light of how she lives her life." Again I wonder if she knows my ex or if it is just that there are girl like there out there.



Any thoughts?

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