Well, I might be a little late in responding, but I also consider myself an attractive young woman and am also still a virgin AND I'm 28, ALMOST 29. It sounds like you need to maybe be finding a couple of strong Christian friends who are also waiting for marriage. It would help to have something to counteract the negative view of sex that you're getting from your friend. I think you'll find that you're not in as much of a minority as you might think. Are there guys at your church that you respect that could be supportive of you in this area? Even older guys who've dealt w/ this could be a real help.
I understand feeling like these are the best years of your life, but trust me, they do get better. Life doesn't end at 21, LOL! And speaking as a woman who's been keeping herself for a possible future husband for nearly 30 years (whew! doesn't feel like it's been that long!), I have a much deeper respect and admiration for those men who've decided to keep that one area of their life special for just their wife. I can't tell you how much I appreciate those who would put away their own desires to honor their wife-to-be.
Stay strong, continue to resist temptation, and go to God with this. Talk it out with Him. He invented sex, so I don't think He'll be too embarrassed by the subject. :)
enjoy...share some of your own and/or let me know what you think!!
Posted : 6 Jul, 2009 07:03 PM
This is an awesome idea! I liked the idea behind "I am only one, but still I am one..." Love the song w/ the lines "I'll stand w/ arms high and heart abandoned, in awe..." such an awesome picture of how completely I want to be turned over to Him.
A few of mine:
"If we are like them, what do we have to offer them? Darkness doesn't need a little less darkness. It needs light."
"'Twas much, that man was made like God before,
But, that God should be made like man, much more."
"Death, be not proud, though some have called thee
Mighty and dreadful, for thou art not so;
For those, whom thou think'st thou dost overthrow,
Die not, poor Death, nor yet canst thou kill me."
"Holy, holy, holy, is the Lord God Almighty, who was and is and is to come. With all creation I sing, praise to the King of Kings, You are my everything, and I will adore You!"
Ps. 139:7-10
"Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast."
I totally agree w/ what Prov31_Lady said. I know it may not feel like it sometimes, but God loves you so much more than you could ever imagine. I've gone through the "I'm worthless" stuff over and over again and although I never got into cutting, I did participate in another self-destructive behavior. Finally my very wise pastor pointed out that me thinking I was worthless and ugly was a total lie that Satan had been filling my head w/ for YEARS. Don't let that jerk tell you that, and don't let others define who you are. You are incredibly unique and special b/c the Creator of the universe made you and He chooses to love you and care for you.
I'm not super wise like some of the folks on this site are, but I have learned that, like Prov31_Lady said, guys will let us down. It will happen. But that doesn't mean that you're not an awesome young woman, and NO ONE has the right to tell you differently.
Thanks for the male perspective, I wasn't sure how guys viewed this sort of thing. And I agree w/ you regarding being truthful about intentions, I value honesty in all areas of life, especially in matters of the heart.
Just read a couple of very interesting books by Gansky: Enoch, and Crime Scene Jerusalem.
Both were good, but Crime Scene Jerusalem was absolutely amazing. The premise is a crime scene investigator suddenly finding himself in 1st century Jerusalem a few days after Christ's death. A guide leads him to the different "crime scenes" where Jesus went in the several hours before his crucifixion. I fascinating way of looking at the age old story.
One of the best authors I've ever read. I especially like his books b/c young and old read them. Some of the teenage girls in my church youth group like to read this kind of off the beaten track (well, off the Christian beaten track) kind of material and if it weren't for Dekker, I think they'd end up reading some strange and possibly unsafe stuff.
And apparently there's Green, which is a continuation of the Circle books? Has anyone read it? Is it good?
Well, I was really shy when I was younger and although I've overcome that, I'm still a little shy when it comes to single guys my age. I've found that I need to take things really slowly and not get too close too fast. But is that kind of thing acceptable in online dating? I mean, I may email or chat with someone for months before I'll feel comfortable exchanging phone numbers.
And even then, I'm very picky about who I would potentially date and most of the time I may not ever desire to be more than friends with someone. So I guess a second question is: is this okay? From reading profiles and chatting w/ a few guys, I've gotten the impression that most people are here to find someone, so I wonder if people would see that as me leading them on by communicating w/ them via a dating website.
It would be about the deception for me as well. It's already a little scary to try to get to know someone online w/o the benefit of reading their face or mannerisms, but if they would seek to deceive others about what they look like, what else might they lie about?
