Thread: A wifes submission, the beauty and good it brings.
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A wifes submission, the beauty and good it brings.
Posted : 20 Aug, 2012 03:52 AM
Brothers and Sisters,
We get all confused as to what submission is in the bible, right?
I was just posting on a thread and I had to hit the submit button. Anyone here have to hit the submit button as well?
What are we doing when we hit the submit button?
We are offering freely our thoughts and feeling on a certain topic, right?
It makes sense now and this has been my sucess in my relationship my with feincee.
She offers her advice , opinion, feelings etc to me and because I love her I consider and listen to her submitted thoughts.
Could submission be as simple as this? YES
But also from a mans point validating her submitted thoughts and from her point submitting thoughts that will easily be recieved.
Many times we out of our great need to be heard try to force our thoughts on another. This is not submission. Like here their are guidelines we are called to follow in comunicating.
For me in my relationship I want to hear her thoughts because i love her. My problem is that she many times holds back on her thoughts because she is fearful of hurting me. She tries to protect me from her feelings. I had this problem with my previous relationship.
This time I am a strong man and once she shares with me I (do not) react out of pride or feeling of rejection to her and can show her compassion and love instead.
Whenever she withholds sharing with me, she limits my being able to express love to her in what she is feeling.
Also God has called a mans wife to be his helper and if she holds back in submitting her thoughts how can she be his help?Being a Husbands helper is not going and doing it by your self. That breakes down unity and seperates you from oneanother.
But women have to remember your words need to come to us with ((((((respect)))))))). Many times your words come in derission or in a form of a command. When you come to a man without respect you will never be heard but you will only push away the man you seek to help. Your attitude toward him is everything.
This I believe is the leading cause of abuse in relationships a woman who does not know how to approace a wounded man. Women who put their men on the defense and ultimatly at war with you.
Its the difference between telling ( trying to be powerful over him) or in submission( gently submitting your advice and thoughts) A angry abusive man is a man who has been belittled all of his life and his wife belittles him as well. A abusive man is so insecure and despretly needs help from a good woman, his wife.
His abuse is his way to feel powerful because deep down in side he feels powerless. But he is to afraid to look at his powerlessness. If you ladies understood the motive behind abuse maybe you could be a better helper to him.
Its not to late to be his helper, The helper God has called you to be...
You can go to your man and ask forgiveness for your continues rejection of him and ask forgiveness for your dissrespect to him.
Men you need to go to your wife and ask forgiveness for being abusive due to your insecurities and weakness.
If a Husband or wife starts here, their is hope for you. If you need further help just ask me and i would love to do so.
A wifes submission, the beauty and good it brings.
Posted : 25 Aug, 2012 06:27 PM
"So where is your practicle example of how a husband shows love to his wife in him making the final decision?
When the decision causes her suffering.....Would you make a decision Will that causes your wife pain???"
You still do not get it, LTM. A true man, not a selfish little boy, puts his family before himself. He sacrifices his own needs and desires for the benefit of his family.
Would I make a decision that caused my wife pain? Depends upon the situation. If it benefited her in the end? Yes.
Want a real world example? Ok.
October, 1977. Mary awoke feeling sick, but this wasnt unsual. Mary had worked in textile mills almost all of her adult life. She had been diagnosed with Brown Lung in 1974.
Mary's husband William, Bill for short, was one of the hardest men you would never want to meet. Inhumanly strong, violent with a serious mean streak, and a WW2 combat hardened veteran that had 39 confirmed combat kills, many of which he only used his hands.
Back to what I was saying. Mary was feeling sick. As per her usual routine, she got out of bed, washed her face and hands, and started to make breakfast. Mary's daughter, I'll call her Joan (her middle name), had moved in with them three years before, after seperating from her adulterous husband. Joan came into the kitchen where her mother was and started helping with breakfast.
Now, Mary was always short of breath. But today, she was even more so, and every so often, she would have to sit down because she was dizzy. After about 30 minutes of this, Joan said, "Mama, I think we need to get Daddy up. I think you need to go to the hospital"
"No, its just my lungs acting up. Its done this before. I'll just wait for it to pass."
Another 15 minutes went by and it hadnt passed, so Joan woke Daddy.
Bill came into the kitchen and ask Mary how she was feeling. Mary told him and he took her wrist and felt her pulse. "Can you get a bath?, He asked. "I dont know", she answered, "but Im alright. Its just my lungs again."
"Your heartbeat aint regular and its fast", he said.
"Im ok".
This went on for about another 20 minutes, until Bill finally said, "I dont want to hear another (expletive) word. Youre going to the hospital. Joan, run a bath for her".
Even after Bill and Joan gave her a bath, Mary still protested. "I need to make sure the grandbabies have breakfast before school." By this time the "grandbabies" were already awake, dressed, and ready to leave. Joan put some sausage in biscuits and told them to go to the bus stop.
Mary was still protesting when Bill had finally had enough.
"Youre going to the hospital. I dont give a (expletive) what you say, how much you (expetive) argue. If I have to knock your *** out, I will. Now shut up! Joan, you drive." Bill picked her up and took her to the car.
I would say "long story short", but weve passed that already. The final part of this is that Mary indeeed had a heart attack. She coded twice, but they were able to revive her. The doctor told them that if she had coded at home, she would have died.
The moral of the story? If Bill had listened to Mary, he wouldnt have had another, almost, 10 years with her... and I would have lost my grandmother when I was 9. Mary died of cancer in July, 1986.
A wifes submission, the beauty and good it brings.
Posted : 25 Aug, 2012 06:35 PM
Apostelle,
I'm relatively new here, and haven't read everything in this thread, but what about when God asked Abraham to sacrifice Issac? That seems to be a biblical scenario where a husband's decision to obey God would have devastated his wife, yet brought blessing to the entire world in the end.
This may not fit the context of the discussion, I'm not sure..
A wifes submission, the beauty and good it brings.
Posted : 25 Aug, 2012 06:36 PM
That's a beautiful story, and often really unheard of. Glad he forced her to go, normally spouses don't look after eachother's interests, only their own. Nice to see one example where a spouse WASN'T looking out for themselves. (But seriously, why all the cussing?) :P
A wifes submission, the beauty and good it brings.
Posted : 25 Aug, 2012 06:59 PM
My grandfather enlisted in the Tennessee National Guard in 1941. By December, 41, he was a sargeant. From 41-44 he was an instructor. After Pearl Habor, he requested combat, but they needed him as an instructor. The military isnt polite. :D
On first day of the Battle of the Ardennes (Battle of the Bulge) he was wounded when an artillery shell struck a bunker he was near. The US lines were falling apart and an officer came into where the wounded were and ask any man who could still stand to volunteer for a "holding action". A holding action is a nice term for "hold your ground until relieved or you are dead. My grandfather volunteered. Soon, they realized the lines were pretty much non-existent.
Realizing this, the unit he was with began operations behind the lines...hitting German supplies, taking out bridges, etc. They had captured some Germans, but the Lt who was in command was lost. He actually asked the German prisoners for directions. The Germans were half starved and were tired of fighting, so they told him. He went in the opposite direction and got them all captured. He spent the remainder of the war in Stalag IX-B, Bad Orb, Germany.
When my grandfather enlisted, he was 6' tall, 200 lbs, with a 32 inch waist. Six weeks after the POW camp was liberated, and he had been eating double rations, he was 5'10 and weighed 115lbs. He tested positive for TB and they had wanted to amputate his feet because of severe frostbite.
A wifes submission, the beauty and good it brings.
Posted : 25 Aug, 2012 07:21 PM
King18David
It does fit. Obedience to God is first and foremost. Yes, it would have devastated Sarah, but Abraham didnt have a choice. Just as Christ didnt have a choice when He was crucified. And wives do not have a choice when it comes to obeying their husbands.
A wifes submission, the beauty and good it brings.
Posted : 25 Aug, 2012 07:45 PM
I'd like to share part of my personal testimony here. If you folks will be kind enough to indulge me, I think it will shine some light on your perceptions of me.
I was born again through a supernatural encounter at the age of nine. I won't go into detail about that part because I consider it personal. I start memorizing Bible immediately following that experience. I considered myself a diligent student of the Word but I was still an impressionable child. Beginning at the age of twelve, I was forced to attend a "Christian" church and school. This went on Sunday morning, Sunday night, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Wednesday night, Thursday and Friday every week for six years. Monday through Friday, I was at the school for close to eight hours a day including five hours a week of "chapel".
So, what happened there you might ask?. I was taught and exposed to false doctrine after false doctrine, legalism, hypocricy and just about every wicked and evil device under the sun including some there who were guilty of pedophilia, incestous behavior, adultery and so on. We had teachers on staff who were sleeping with students, getting caught, "repenting" and then teaching again straightaway. A lot of the behavior was known but swept under the rug. I am not going to get into detail about what I personally endured there but it was not pleasant.
By the time I graduated high school, I hated everything and anything that had to do with "Christianity" and "God". For the next few years, I got involved in much sin. Accept for the grace and mercy of God, I didn't lose my life which still surprises me to this day. By my early twenties, the Lord began to do a turnaround in my life. He placed within me a burning desire to know the Truth about Him. I slowly began to study the Word of God again trying to find some answers. By my early 30's I had become totally obsessed with my Bible study sometimes not sleeping at all while I studied through the night. This still continues to this day. I have estimated that I have over 35,000 hours of study and counting.
What's the point of all of this story? As a result of my personal experiences, I have an extreme hatred of false doctrine. Why? because it stole much from my life and almost killed me. Over the course of my life, I have met many others who have had similar experiences. It breaks my heart each time. This has increased my hatred of false doctrines and those who peddle it. I just cannot tolerate it. I do my best to pick and choose my battles because I cannot go around refuting everything, everywhere.
One other thing that's related. Because of what my Lord has brought me through and his extraordinary love for me, I have a deep and profound love for Him. I will not tolerate anyone spitting in my King's face. I will not allow someone to vilely curse God, accuse God, blaspheme God, and so on in my presence without responding. Perhaps, that is my own shortcoming.
Some of you have suggested to me that I seem harsh, angry, unloving at times and so on. I take that to heart and I take it to my King. Maybe now, you will have a better understanding of where I coming from and why it sometimes seems that I am not a very nice guy.
Thanks for reading and thanks for your patience with me.
A wifes submission, the beauty and good it brings.
Posted : 25 Aug, 2012 08:21 PM
Will,
I can say my life is much like yours. I too found God at the age of Nine and went on a journey much like yours but what I have found in my latter years might not be where you are today. You will know what I mean when you find it. Until then keep the faith.
A wifes submission, the beauty and good it brings.
Posted : 25 Aug, 2012 08:29 PM
Will,
I think you can atest that where you started from and were you are today are not the same place, right?
So you know that their is truth that is beyond our understanding until we understand. Please dont dismiss that i have understanding beyond what you have recieved.
