Author	Thread: why is it friends OR romantic partners?
Matthew75 View Profile History	why is it friends OR romantic partners? Posted : 1 Apr, 2014 09:35 PM If the longest lasting best marriages there are based on feedback from people who have been married the longest are ones where you marry your best friend... why do so many women want to draw a line between friends and potential romantic relationships? Personally, at this stage in my life, I don't want a romantic relationship but I know in the future I will want one again. I don't want to have to go mate hunting if I have a dozen female friends that I get along with... Why does it have to be one or the other? I've met lots of women and they all seem to have this perspective. They say things like, "we have a good friendship and I don't want to loose that..." Or getting turned down for a second date because "your more like a good friend.." I really don't understand this getting slotted and locked into the "friend" category of relationships. It would seem to me that being friends provides a foundation to build on rather than trying to start a romantic relationship with a stranger. If you are friends and already basically know each others way of thinking, favorites, etc... why is progressing to a more romantic relationship such a disaster? Post Reply
Apostelle View Profile History	why is it friends OR romantic partners? Posted : 7 Apr, 2014 06:59 AM Im a guy, but I have a story that relates somewhat to this. I was friends with a lady for a long time. (10 years). I developed deep feelings for her, but when I asked her out, she said she "didnt want to take a chance of ruining our friendship". This was very painful. Our friendship died anyway because I stopped going to the places I saw her. The reason I stopped was because it hurt too much to see her, knowing the feelings I had for her. It wasnt her fault that she didnt feel the same way, but I wasnt going to keep inflicting that pain upon myself. Post Reply
View Profile History	why is it friends OR romantic partners? Posted : 7 Apr, 2014 06:09 PM Oh no, friend zoned again! Logic dictates that you'd start off as friends first and build up to romance; and most women would agreed - until they clap eyes on someone who makes their pulse race then all bets are off. That, in a nutshell is why you're just friends - you don't make her heart skip a beat when she sees you, she doesn't fantasize about walking down the aisle with you, or waking up next to you. And there's nothing you can do to change it because whereas men can grow to love from friendship, women still seem to need that initial 'spark' which wasn't there for the two of you. If you want to continue the friendship, knowing that's all it'll ever be, then that's perfectly ok - she may have a friend or a sister that does want to be more than just friends - but that could also be time spent in the wrong company causing you to miss an opportunity elsewhere. Post Reply
Apostelle View Profile History	why is it friends OR romantic partners? Posted : 9 Apr, 2014 06:16 AM Most of the couples Ive known that were together forever, started off as romantic interests. Friendship develops over time. Starting off as friends which leads to something more only happens in the movies. Post Reply
Matthew75 View Profile History	why is it friends OR romantic partners? Posted : 9 Apr, 2014 06:32 PM Not to brag but I honestly don't have a problem triggering that "spark" but I rarely move fast enough to satisfy them and fall back to the friend zone...never to return. It gets frustrating as by the time I'm ready to move forward, they've moved on. Post Reply

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