I don�t care who responds, but I thought this thread might have a bigger audience over here. :goofball:
TV and magazines (and yes, a lot of our peers) try to make us feel that we need a big, white dress, a tall cake, and a fabulous banquet to have a dream wedding. Not to mention the gigantic rock (the ring) and an exotic honeymoon. Also, a lot of wedding ceremonies and even reception parties are so deeply rooted in tradition, it is almost not worth it to argue with the status quo.
What wedding traditions do you value and think are still important (giving away of the bride, rings, the white dress, unity candle, etc)? Are there any (besides God�s clearly-stated sexual laws) that you feel are important from a biblical standpoint?
The best wedding I ever went to was for my cousin. She and her hubby to be had grown up in the same church. Money was an issue. So, the church helped out.
The youth group decorated the sanctuary with flowers culled from members' gardens.
The ladies of the church hosted a pot luck dinner for the wedding reception.
The Sunday school class of the couple baked the cakes. The wedding cake was three layers and had slipped slightly...leaving it to lean a bit. However, love was so obviously baked in.
The entire wedding was low budget. However, the entire church came together to help the couple with their wedding. It was beautiful. While not the professional designer style seen on TV, there was so much love apparent in every little detail.
Elisa, that reminds me of a wedding I attended several years ago. My church's childrens choir went to another local church to see the kids musical there (since we were doing the same one a few months later), and I went along as a chaperon. It was a Sunday evening, so there were a lot of people in attendance. After the musical and all other service-related things were over, the pastor asked everyone to please remain seated for a few minutes, that we were about to witness a special event.
He called an older couple forward (they were in their 70s), and announced that the couple would like to get married, and since they had both been married previously (and both been widowed), they didn't want a fancy ceremony. What they wanted was to be married in front of their family, church family, and friends. Anyone who wanted to was invited to join them for supper at a local restaurant, but there was no official reception.
It was short, sweet, and very memorable. I think the church pianist played the Bridal Chorus while they walked to the front, then played the Wedding March as they walked back to their seats. The groom wore a black suit, the bride wore a cream suit-type dress. The whole ceremony probably cost them next to nothing, and they were quite happy!
If my mom ever remarries, I think that's how she should do it...she didn't have a big wedding when she married my dad, but she has always said that it was still bigger than she wanted. She doesn't like a lot of fuss and attention. To her, it was the 14 years of a nearly-perfect marriage that was important, not the 30 minute ceremony.
I would prefer having a small wedding, with just immediate family. Yes, I still want a wedding dress, but not necessarily the elaborate wedding ceremony.
However, I would like a reception to celebrate that special time with all my friends and family.
There is one wedding tradition that I find a bit surprising that it has changed.
While the white dress is a symbol of purity, it is not a symbol of virginity. It is the lace that is the symbol of virginity. Originally, the white dress symbolized the purity in which the husband would not abandon his wife�s emotional and sexual needs, therefore causing her to seek fulfillment of those needs elsewhere. Over the years that symbolism has changed into just the symbolism of virginity.
I had never heard about lace being symbolic of anything. The white wedding dress, from my understanding, was just another case of Christians taking a non-Christian tradition and saying it's Christian (like so many things used to celebrate Christmas). It was my understanding that a white dress was used by Queen Victoria as a demonstration of wealth. Anybody who could afford all that silk in a then-impossible-to-restore color, and drag it across the ground, had a LOT of money. From what I understand women just started emulating her and gradually the "virginity" and "putity" was added. Then there came the rhyme, which I imagine a mother-in-law coined to try to influence her son's wedding. :goofball:
Married in white, you will have chosen all right.
Married in grey , you will go far away.
Married in black, you will wish yourself back.
Married in red, you�ll wish yourself dead.
Married in blue, you will always be true.
Married in pearl, you�ll live in a whirl.
Married in green, ashamed to be seen,
Married in yellow, ashamed of the fellow.
Married in brown, you�ll live out of town.
Married in pink, your spirits will sink.
I'm just amazed (and often annoyed) at how adamant some brides are about the "importance" of a white dress, and then get some ridiculous, showy, immodest circus of lace and embellishment. I don't know, doesn't seem to fit with what weddings are about, at least to me.
