Thread: A wifes submission, the beauty and good it brings.
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A wifes submission, the beauty and good it brings.
Posted : 20 Aug, 2012 03:52 AM
Brothers and Sisters,
We get all confused as to what submission is in the bible, right?
I was just posting on a thread and I had to hit the submit button. Anyone here have to hit the submit button as well?
What are we doing when we hit the submit button?
We are offering freely our thoughts and feeling on a certain topic, right?
It makes sense now and this has been my sucess in my relationship my with feincee.
She offers her advice , opinion, feelings etc to me and because I love her I consider and listen to her submitted thoughts.
Could submission be as simple as this? YES
But also from a mans point validating her submitted thoughts and from her point submitting thoughts that will easily be recieved.
Many times we out of our great need to be heard try to force our thoughts on another. This is not submission. Like here their are guidelines we are called to follow in comunicating.
For me in my relationship I want to hear her thoughts because i love her. My problem is that she many times holds back on her thoughts because she is fearful of hurting me. She tries to protect me from her feelings. I had this problem with my previous relationship.
This time I am a strong man and once she shares with me I (do not) react out of pride or feeling of rejection to her and can show her compassion and love instead.
Whenever she withholds sharing with me, she limits my being able to express love to her in what she is feeling.
Also God has called a mans wife to be his helper and if she holds back in submitting her thoughts how can she be his help?Being a Husbands helper is not going and doing it by your self. That breakes down unity and seperates you from oneanother.
But women have to remember your words need to come to us with ((((((respect)))))))). Many times your words come in derission or in a form of a command. When you come to a man without respect you will never be heard but you will only push away the man you seek to help. Your attitude toward him is everything.
This I believe is the leading cause of abuse in relationships a woman who does not know how to approace a wounded man. Women who put their men on the defense and ultimatly at war with you.
Its the difference between telling ( trying to be powerful over him) or in submission( gently submitting your advice and thoughts) A angry abusive man is a man who has been belittled all of his life and his wife belittles him as well. A abusive man is so insecure and despretly needs help from a good woman, his wife.
His abuse is his way to feel powerful because deep down in side he feels powerless. But he is to afraid to look at his powerlessness. If you ladies understood the motive behind abuse maybe you could be a better helper to him.
Its not to late to be his helper, The helper God has called you to be...
You can go to your man and ask forgiveness for your continues rejection of him and ask forgiveness for your dissrespect to him.
Men you need to go to your wife and ask forgiveness for being abusive due to your insecurities and weakness.
If a Husband or wife starts here, their is hope for you. If you need further help just ask me and i would love to do so.
A wifes submission, the beauty and good it brings.
Posted : 25 Aug, 2012 02:46 PM
" If a husband makes a decision without considering his wifes feelings and this causes continual hurt to his wife is he showing Christ like love to his wife?"
No
" If the husband doesnt recieve his wifes submission through her expressing her thoughts and feelings to her husband is he loving his wife? "
That's the same question as above. No
"I will be interested to see when and if anyone has the courage to answer"
A wifes submission, the beauty and good it brings.
Posted : 25 Aug, 2012 02:52 PM
Michael,
Can we break this down into some categories first. Let's say MAJOR decisions vs. MINOR decisions.
Obviously it isn't practical to consult a spouse over every single decision that the other makes. So, let's try to focus on MAJOR decisions. Is that acceptable?
Now, for sake of the discussion, why would the husbands final decision ever NOT go well assuming he has sought the Lord, discussed things with his wife, etc? From your experience or theoretically.. what are some scenarios?
A wifes submission, the beauty and good it brings.
Posted : 25 Aug, 2012 02:58 PM
"it is true that it doesn't talk about marriage in AMOS 3:3 but it is true that sometimes thing cannot be read literally.it is all subjective and cannot sometimes be read theologically.like the old testament,the slavery the freedom of the isrealite for that matter is not relevant to us in any ways.it is nothing but a history but if we read metaphorical site of it and read between the lines the journey of isrealite could be interpreted as our spiritual journey through life.yes in Amos 3:3in it does not necessarily talk about marriage but a personal interpretation of a verse through spirit cannot be question either for one word or a sentence.it can be interpreted in many ways.that is why the bible is a living book."
The application is there for us today. Amos 3:3 as a standalone verse only teaches us that people cannot walk together unless they make an appointment to do so. Even LTM showed this to be so when he posted the original language. All it means is that you and LTM aren't going to have dinner tonight without planning to do so. You aren't just going to both magically appear at a nice restaurant tonight. I wish we could move on from the Amos 3 issue because there are plenty of other verses we can discuss which actually are relevant. In fact, had LTM understood the proper meaning of the word, "agreed" beforehand, he would have never even sought the verse out for a defense. I don't mean that to be harsh. It's just a statement of fact. So let's move on from here.
A wifes submission, the beauty and good it brings.
Posted : 25 Aug, 2012 03:09 PM
" When the decision causes her suffering.....Would you make a decision Will that causes your wife pain???"
Depending on the circumstance, yes. What you are missing is that the intent isn't the causing of pain. I can choose to spank my child and that can cause my wife pain. Does that mean what I did was wrong? Let's think logically about this. If you think that you and your wife will always agree, you are mistaken. What you will agree on in the end is that someone will make a decision, whether it be her or you. That's not an agreement with the decision though. You will disagree. If you don't believe me, bookmark this thread and come back a few years later.
A wifes submission, the beauty and good it brings.
Posted : 25 Aug, 2012 03:14 PM
Apos,
Thanks guys, I am doing some painting and checking in on the post So i look forward to reading everyones thoughts more intently latter.
I would like to take Apos example with the car and show a different perspective practically that would have had a good out come. But first dinner and finish painting.....
A wifes submission, the beauty and good it brings.
Posted : 25 Aug, 2012 05:26 PM
I have plenty of examples of men making bad decisions, especially "husbands". It's because they don't know the meaning of husbandry.
I hate to air dirty laundry, especially my family's but I feel this is necessary to bring the point home that just because you're a husband doesn't mean you have your wife's best interest at heart, or heck even your own.
My father has always had a severe problem with spending money, he has wild and crazy dreams that he thinks he will fulfill, he doesn't believe in gambling but has done so all his life, just in a different sense. He spent money on crazy get-rich-quick schemes and bought property he never did anything with, and 900 numbers, and cars that he's abandoned. All while his family needed things, like shoes and clothes and necessary things. When my brother was a baby, he didn't want to spend money on his formula, or let my mom buy a baby monitor after he was born (doctor recommended) so as to listen and make sure he was still breathing. She had laid, many times by his crib all night trying to make sure he was still breathing.
All the while, through his mistreatment of her, and my siblings and I...My mom was a faithful wife to him, carried his laundry for a mile some days to do his laundry at a local laundromat, loved him, cooked for him. You could definitely say she was an obedient wife. His decisions for her, that he made for her, ruined (in the eyes of the world, and not of God) her life, and he left her.
I would urge all women reading this to listen to the truth and submit to your husbands....but choose wisely before you marry.Make sure he belongs to the Lord and he is not a liar. Do not listen to their words, watch their actions. If they are of God they will have a loving heart, and will not wish bad things for you, or put themselves first. A godly man would not do anything the Bible forbids and he would be a loving care taking husband and look to see what he can improve in your life, not what he can take away.
A wifes submission, the beauty and good it brings.
Posted : 25 Aug, 2012 05:42 PM
Those are very wise words MrMarvel...for women, and for men. That women and men should use great wisdom in whom they unite themselves with, because regardless what happens, that union will have an affect that will last a lifetime.
A wifes submission, the beauty and good it brings.
Posted : 25 Aug, 2012 05:55 PM
Did you just call me Mr? You're going to get chased and clobbered, young man.
Hear, hear... I've seen a lot of women who've left their husbands, who've been faithful providers for them and their children, and quite frankly gave them everything they could desire. I'm just like... wow, worldly women are just as bad as worldly men. It honestly makes me sad that a woman can't stay with her husband of many years, who practically adores her. Kind of makes me wonder where the fear of the Lord has gone.
Find out who you're marrying as best as you can, and ask the Lord for his guidance, is all I can say. These three remain, faith, hope and love, the greatest of these is love.
