dear inhis, a seperated person is not supposed to be in search of a romantic relationship according to the bible..
but a friendship and fellowship with other believers i do believe is important.. i didnt read your profile so im not sure if youve ever been seperated or divorced before. but im sure folks didnt shun you at that time if you were.. and if they did i am sure that would of been a very lonely and low time for you..
when the christian community cuts off their own, those that are seperated and even those that have been divorced i believe thats the catapault to lead others into sin or even away from JESUS moreso than to just have friends and fellowship with other believers..
we have no idea what happened in their marriages.. less they tell us. so how can we condemn them already?
they can be biblically seperated and even divorceing..
i personally wont shun anyone thats seperated from a friendship and or fellowship..
"The Bible" a seperated man or woman is still married !
No judging on my part just, a fact.
Somthing to ponder;
I have never married, but to think and meditate on this; If I were still married to someone, is it fare to my spouce or to the new friend to put them in a place to possible be the one that could be the final wedge between the two married ones ?
If I'm still married to someone would I be causing one to commit adultry, if im looking for a romantic intrest ? If one were truly honest, I would have to wonder the true reason they came to a christian date sight in the first place ...my guess is the same as all of us, a romantic intrest .
As far as one says about being on here for friends or fellowshiping, Keep in mind,... A date sight is not the only place to find christian friends. Ahh however a date sight (as this is), is the palce to find a friend of an other gender.No guys on here looking for guy friendships or the other way around.
If I were married, would my husband or I like it if the other were to get into a friendship sharing our hearts and minds with one of the opposite sex ?
I think NOT !
His thoughts, desires, wishes hopes and dreams, just as mine, are to be shared with the other. Not one, of an other gender out of our marrige bond / union .
Yes, the best way to start a marrige and to keep one is to be a great friend to the other person. However I also think the best way to destroy a marrige and end it for good is to get a an other friend, when your spouce, is supose to be your best friend you will have of an other gender.
It is not possible to have a definite response to this question as every situation is different and the laws of every state are different. In my particular case, in SC, it takes a long time to divorce.
There are some justifiable reasons to divorce that are not Biblical grounds according to some people's interpretation.
There are cases like mine where I gave it 11 years of trying to reconcile and no longer have hope. Are you going to judge me for that? The forgiveness clause in my state (a legal loophole) requires me to wait another year.
In some cases, divorce is a spiritual necessity. To assume that someone does not respect the institution of marriage is not fair. Meeting people is not adultery. And yes, if there is any chance of reconciliation a person should not behave in any way that would jeopardize a marriage. But when both people have agreed that there is no chance of reconciliation, both pastors have agreed, and a marriage counselor have agreed then I think you should suspend judgment because it can take a long time to finalize a divorce depending on the circumstances.
Should someone drag a romantic interest through a complicated divorce--NO!
There are so many individual circumstances I think you should hear the person out first.
Separated but no chance of reconciliation divorce pending...
Separation means you are still married in the eyes of God. There is no or should be no question concerning this. Should a person on this site be shunned because they are still married? Of course NOT! However it is highly prudent that a person who is separated seek same gender fellowship and not entertain opposite gender fellowship as that can escalate to something unholy. Don't place yourself or another person into temptation. Let's face reality here. A person who is separated is extremely vunerable and can form a bond with someone they should not. There are people, both men and women who would take advantage of this situation. After all there are wolves among the sheep. Exercise caution my Friends!
There are also very specific limits as to when a person can divorce another in the eyes of God! Forget what man allows. It is what God says that matters. If two believers are married tan only "Fornication'Adultery" is the only allowable reason for a Biblical divorce and to have the ability to remarry at least for the innocent party not the adulterer/adulteress.
If a believer is married to a non-believer than IF and I say if the NON-Believer leaves/abandons you then the believer is no longer bound to the marriage covenant.
What I would like to say for those of you who don't seem to fall within the obvious allowances for remarriage. Remember that while you are separated and your spouse committs adultery during that time, then you have grounds for divorce and remarriage. More often than not, during separation, one spouse will commit adultery. Let us also keep in mind that God gives GRACE and MERCY to us all and that if you have remarried unbiblically, if you repent, God forgives you! This of course does NOT mean you have to divorce. You cannot unscramble eggs. Additionally, if your ex-spouse remarried then he/she freed you to remarry because you cannot reconcile back to him any more. No one should rush to any divorce but allow a period of separation so that God can work on both of you and see if reconcilliation is possible. People can change through the power of God. Marriage is a religious institution. so if you get divorced by man's laws, it does not mean that you are divorced in the eyes of God.
We all need to give grace to each other in this and not be legalistic. Some denominations have gone to the extreme on this issue and have even shunned people unnecessarily who are divorced, forgetting themselves that they too are just as bad a sinner, if not worse, as the rest of us. None of us are in any position to cast the first stone.
