Author	Thread: Ladies, please help me make sense of this if you can
Admin	Ladies, please help me make sense of this if you can Posted : 13 Mar, 2011 07:47 PM I am a member of this site as well as a couple of other free sites and I have a non-suscription profile to christianmingle floating around out there, and I seem to have noticed something rather odd and frustrating when it comes to trying to get to know christian women from these sites. When I find a profile of someone I'm interested in, I'll usually send them an iniating message like this..... "Hi! I just came across your profile and you seem like someone I'd like to get to know more. Maybe we can chat sometime if you're interested. God bless!" More than 50% I don't get a response back, and the majority of the few that do respond back, we will exchange a few or so messages back and forth and then suddenly I will never hear from them again. I'm not pushy or anything, nor am I crawling up their leg or anything creepy. All I'm trying to do is to get to know them. I might ask them about their walk with God, or what their hobbies are, or what they do for school/work, etc. I also tend to ask them if they have AIM and facebook. Is there anything I could be doing wrong to creep these ladies out??? I'm really not trying to be pushy or creepy. I'm just trying to get to know them better. It's not rocket science. In order to get to know someone, you have to COMMUNICATE with them. I'm starting to find this rather frustrating. Any advice? Post Reply
Tulip89 View Profile History	Ladies, please help me make sense of this if you can Posted : 13 Mar, 2011 10:39 PM I can't speak specifically to your other messages, but with a first message like the one you've been sending, you're going to get ignored a lot. It doesn't mention what you like about their profile, share anything particularly interesting, or say anything that will make them laugh. Basically, it's going to end up in the pile of other messages girls get that say basically the same thing. If you spruce it up, I'm sure your response rate will increase. Post Reply
View Profile History	Ladies, please help me make sense of this if you can Posted : 14 Mar, 2011 12:02 AM If you are asking for AIM or FB within the first few messages, most likely that is why you are not hearing back from these girls. Get to know them first, and let them make the decision about what info to share. We don't like sharing that type of information because of scammers, stalkers, etc. It's more of a security issue there. Ditto what Tulip said about opening messages. Post Reply
View Profile History	Ladies, please help me make sense of this if you can Posted : 14 Mar, 2011 07:01 AM I think the more personal the message, the harder for the message recipient to ignore the message he/she just read. Post Reply
bcpianogal View Profile History	Ladies, please help me make sense of this if you can Posted : 14 Mar, 2011 08:02 AM I agree with what's already been said. Post Reply
View Profile History	Ladies, please help me make sense of this if you can Posted : 14 Mar, 2011 07:56 PM The message is too generic. It does not tell the girl that you have read her profile or that you put any thought in how you two could have something in common. Try writing something personal next time. I the girl's profile says she is a big hunter and you like to hunt, that would be a common interest. You could ask about the last time she went hunting. The goal is to build trust through common interests. Post Reply
Tempest2 View Profile History	Ladies, please help me make sense of this if you can Posted : 21 Mar, 2011 03:53 PM I agree with everyone's statements. Post Reply
reka7 View Profile History	Ladies, please help me make sense of this if you can Posted : 30 May, 2011 03:13 PM perhaps online dating is just not for yu. yu should go out more :peace: Post Reply