Hello. my name is Lolo. I am a 21 year old hispanic. I am in my third year of Bible college, about to graduate in may. I love God, and do my very best to serve him everyday. I am a Childrens Pastor. I have somewhat of a problem though. I have never been on a date, and I am not getting the response I was hoping for on this site. I have a lot of friendship and love to offer, but am not always given a chance. I have been rejected by every girl I have ever asked out, which has really killed my confidence in talking to ladies. Do you have any advice for me. thank you:waving:
Keep your confidence in the Lord where it belongs, and never ever place your confidence in the responses of others around you. People are like mirrors, and we often unknowingly view ourselves through them, which can be a huge mistake. Instead, view yourself through the Word of God, and trust HIM that as you seek Him first, HE is more than capable of adding everything you will ever need to accomplish HIS purpose in your life.
Also,
God could have created Eve in the very beginning, right? But He didn�t. Instead, God waited till Adam was actively involved in the work that HE had called Adam to do. Like Adam, as you give yourself faithfully to the work God has called you to, God will prepare for you a helper just as He did for Adam - it is likely He�s preparing her now.
One more thing,
You may have already done this, but just in case you haven�t - begin to remember this special young woman in your prayers�by faith :) that the Lord would be with her, keep her and bless her as He prepares her to serve by your side!
Thank you Dreamtime. that is what I needed to hear. I know that there is someone out there being prepared for me. It is hard to wait though. I need to have more patience. And I used to pray for her. I dont know why I stoped. I will start again though. Thank you.:glow:
As one of your brothers in Christ, that's exactly what I needed to hear from you!
The Apostle Paul said that the approval of men (meaning women and men) meant absolutely nothing to him!
Why?
Because it is God's approval that is the ONLY approval that matters - and it is HE that reigns and provides that which is needed!
Another thing Lolo,
You have got to resist the continual temptation to alter or change yourself in any way in order to gain the approval of the opposite sex. As soon as anyone makes a move in that direction, they are no longer looking to the Lord to provide for them, and instead they begin looking to the approval of men = no longer walking by faith / a move to save your own life. And believe me Lolo, you want a wife to be "added unto you" by the Lord, and that by faith. You do NOT want a wife added unto you by your own hands = unless the Lord builds the house (our lives), the builder builds in vain! ;)
Lolo, God is going to cause you to walk by faith...so that you will be able to lead and give hope to others in the ministry.
I tried to message you privately, but evidently I'm a little too old to be writing you on this site :toomuch:
You're making me feel ancient dude...
Anyways,
Since I couldn't send this to you via a message, I'm going to go ahead and post it here. Hope you don't mind.
I thought you might be able to use it to minister to others in your church. If you do, you can change it around however you see fit!
We routinely work with youths in group homes e.g. CPS, DES, orphans and children who are refugees. So if you ever want to kick around what we've learned while working with kids, like I said, feel free to write me. :winksmile:
What I wanted to send you...
These Thoughts Are Not Complete, But They May Be Helpful.
To spiritually love our wives. What a beautiful thing! To understand their physical bodies in light of their spiritual reality! What significance might a woman�s bre asts have spiritually? How can we truly come to see our wives in this way? How can we come to love our wives in spirit and in truth? The way they deserve to be seen as bearers of the image of God.
Anyone is able to love someone in the physical, focusing only on the physical reality of the person they are with, while the person they are focusing on remains in a state of spiritual death and decay. But if the "flesh counts for nothing", and yet Jesus calls us to love one another, then is He calling us to love one another in what does not count (the flesh)?
When we come together with our wives, are we to only be focusing on that in our wives and enjoying that in our wives that counts for nothing? That, which will not last, but is going to eventually perish (the flesh)? Absolutely not. It is appropriate to enjoy the physical aspects of our wives, but the emphasis needs to be placed on Christ within them. HE needs to be the focus of our affections. Otherwise we set ourselves up to be able to enjoy the physical aspects of anyone and anything whether Christ is a part of those things or not. We set our wives up as well to respond favorably to this type of affection. Which can come from anyone.
How many mothers focus only on the physical aspects of their children in the name of love and do exceptional jobs of raising perfectly healthy children who are spiritually starving to death and in a state of spiritual decay? How many husbands focus only on the physical aspects of their wives in the name of love and do exceptional jobs of leading a perfectly healthy woman who is spiritually starving to death and in a state of spiritual decay?
When most Mothers raise their children they are focused only on the physical state of their children instead of their children�s spiritual reality. When most couples engage in physical intimacy they are focused only on the physical state of their intimacy (themselves) instead of each other�s spiritual reality (Christ within each of them). When people view pornography, they too are focused on the physical and not on Christ in themselves or in the people or persons they are viewing. And whenever anyone focuses only on the physical, they are able to enjoy the person they are focusing on regardless of that person�s spiritual condition (reality). They are able to �in the name of love� show no concern whatsoever (true love) for the starving spiritual condition of the person they are essentially using. We do not mean to do this to ourselves or to others. Adam and Eve did not mean to do this to each other either. But nonetheless, in both cases it is what it is. And somehow we are disconnected from the truth (reality) of what we are to be focused on.
Are we attracted to physically dead, decaying people? Not at all. Have you seen a coke advertisement using a rotting corpse lately? Probably not. How can we become reconnected to the �meaning� that is truly there? Spiritual reality. Remembering that the flesh counts for nothing.
It was Jehovah God that the Israelites were to enjoy in the richness of the Promise Land (spiritual). Not just the Promise Land itself (the physical). But because the Israelites failed to see this, they failed completely.
If attraction, arousal and intimacy were seen for what they are, for what they must be, for someone�s spiritual condition, and we weren�t so focused on what counts for nothing (the flesh), then it would not be so easy to be tempted by pornography. Adultery would be seen for what it is. Countless television shows would loose their appeal and be canceled, and on and on and on.
We are viewing each other with eyes that will one day rot and decay. We are not viewing the reality of what is around us, which can only be seen with our minds. And because of this, we are being deceived. Appearance seldom equals reality. Just because someone is nice or physically appealing does not mean that they�re good.
Why would someone want to have children with a dead person? Why would someone want a dead person to kiss them, make love to them, raise and teach their children? Can spiritually dead people make God feel good? Are they able to please God? Should spiritually dead people be able to make us feel good? In movies, music, as friends and even family. Who were Christ's mothers, brothers and sisters? Which reality was HE focused on? Remember, that it is His image that we bear.
Wow. That is deep. True!! So many times, I see myself being attracted to the physical characteristics of the opposite sex, then look for their spirituality, and relationship with the Lord. I know that I am not supposed to change myself to gain approval, and I try not to. I am trying to just wait on the Lord, but their are times that I feel that I need to do my part as well. That is when I tend to take matters into my own hands.I am working on that. I really appreciate your help. You do not know what it means to me.
