Author	Thread: Backing Away
Admin	Backing Away Posted : 20 Apr, 2010 09:14 PM What do you do when the girl you're interested in isn't interested in you (or at least when you think so but aren't completely sure)? how do you give up hope and detatch after getting attatched when you don't want to? Post Reply
View Profile History	Backing Away Posted : 20 Apr, 2010 09:25 PM You cry =( And you try to get your mind onto other things. When you find yourself thinking about the person, force yourself to do something else that will get your mind off of her. Pray, read, your Bible, work out, watch a funny movie, etc. It gets better with time. Post Reply
View Profile History	Backing Away Posted : 20 Apr, 2010 10:07 PM I'm a guy. I don't cry well. But you're right. Thanx pix. Post Reply
springrose10 View Profile History	Backing Away Posted : 21 Apr, 2010 02:40 AM Hi Remp, My first reaction to your question was, "Why are you asking Pixy?" ('Course you weren't specifically.) She gave you a good response, but that is a question that you could pose to the young lady herself. I get so tickled at you, Remp. I'm old enough to be your mother. Sometimes you remind me of a puppie chewing on furniture if left alone too long. You are young with so much intensity, that you need to take a deep breath like every 2 sentences. So, roll your eyes at me, and then, consider my suggestion. There is nothing wrong with you telling the young lady that you don't know her level of interest in you and so you no longer know how to respond to her. Ask her what kind of communication or relationship she would like to see develop from this point in your friendship. If she wants to end it...(take another deep breath) ask her why she' not interested - you would like to know if it is a difference in the things that you are interested in, just basic personality differences, or if there is something that you can work on that would build your character and faith. The last question is what will help you find closure and move on with the other suggestions Pixy gave you. And of course, pray first. God still has a plan, Rose Post Reply
View Profile History	Backing Away Posted : 21 Apr, 2010 06:34 AM Pixy that was funny," you cry". so helpful for a guy. I find it funny you would say that. get some pet cats they will make better bed mates. Mine do. :ROFL: :hearts: They love me no matter what. :laugh: Post Reply
View Profile History	Backing Away Posted : 21 Apr, 2010 07:55 AM because in the unlikely event that she did respond she'd probably just say something along the lines of 'why are you so weird/pathetic', maybe i'll give it a try, but i don't know if she'd think i was just being a stalker or creepy. if you ever want to know what the deal is or somebody to level with you the least helpful has always seemed to be ask somebody that doesn't care. Post Reply
View Profile History	Backing Away Posted : 21 Apr, 2010 08:55 AM your first question seems to suggest that she has already stated her position, but the second post from you suggests that you haven't made a move yet. i'll respond to the first post ... hmmm, think of what it would mean for you to pursue this woman and about her current state of mind. i would think if she is not interested that she would have already mentally moved on. it would now be your task to catch her attention, without annoying her, and all the while not seeming desperate. based upon my experience with aggressive pursuers i think it's better for you to cash in and count your losses. after a girl tells you she's not interested the first time, it can only go down hill from there if you keep trying. actually it's a 50/50 type of thing. for me, its the -ive 50 because after i said no thanks, i really hate to repeat. the +ive 50 i have only heard about, where the guy was persistent and got the girl. prayer is the only way to tell... try putting yourself in her shoes, how would you feel if someone you were not interested in kept pursuing you? nyanda:purpleangel: Post Reply
View Profile History	Backing Away Posted : 21 Apr, 2010 09:09 AM no she hasn't SAID she wasn't interested. communication just seems to have changed. it was good at first she seemed interested but now it's really infrequent and when we do talk it's for a little bit and it seems like i'm the only one trying to keep the conversation going. Post Reply
View Profile History	Backing Away Posted : 21 Apr, 2010 09:29 AM i c... i hope she has not caught the "next best thing" syndrome, but from what i've seen around these forums, those are symptoms. the only remedy i see here is prayer and good ole communication. if you want to take the safe route, find out where her head is instead of laying all your cards on the table facing up! as you insinuated her actions are screaming out loud as ever, so unfortunately she may be terminal. hmm, what would i do...? hmmm, i would fix my eyes on Jesus and tough it out, and give thanks no matter what. i would definitely lay off on the calling/texting. nyanda:purpleangel: Post Reply
SOS4EMAILFRIEND View Profile History	Backing Away Posted : 21 Apr, 2010 09:57 AM @remp There is a difference between knowing and being sure. I think you know and you wonder if you need to be sure before (letting her) moving on I would put my energy on other priorities first. May I suggest that you first take care of your own feelings. Moving on with your life is not getting rid of feelings. It is about giving it a place in your life (heart if you prefer). The idea is that, whenever thinking back, you remember the lady (and your feelings for her) with a cherishing smile... If you prefer to be fully sure, then you must ask the lady in question. Post Reply
Tulip89 View Profile History	Backing Away Posted : 21 Apr, 2010 10:27 AM My first thought is that perhaps your conversation has gotten stale. Try to stay away from "how's your day going" and other run of the mill, standard questions. Second, you may be too available. If she knows she has you in the bag, she may be looking to see if she can "upgrade." It's sad that Christian girls aren't immune to it, but it's just the way too many women are. Ultimately, pull back too. Desperation is no way to get the girl, that's for sure. As for dealing with the fact that she may not be very interested in you, it's a little late for "don't get too attached." Therefore, I recommend messaging other girls. Get your mind off her. Do other things to help you disassociate from your emotions. I don't know why you would cry though. It isn't like you just saw Old Yeller for the first time or you're out of sweet tea. Womens can be so silly sometimes. Post Reply

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