I recall my friend of 28 who kept himself pure until marriage and then he met a gal of 30. They fell in love and she had to tell him one day that she was not a virgin. It was one of the hardest things for her to do and she wept so. She so badly wished that she had waited just as he had waited. They went on to get married and they are both so happy to this day.
Another male friend also waited and then met a gal in college. Not only was she a virgin, she had never kissed a man. He decided to marry her and decided not to kiss her until the wedding. He did just that and then later he said that he wished that he too had waited to kiss a woman until he found his spouse. (He had kissed another gal before he had met her.) Not surprisingly, she never regretted waiting at all.
Another guy friend waited to be sexually intimate until 32 when he married. His wife had had multiple sexual partners in the past and she also was convicted. She was so thankful that he still decided to marry her even though she had not waited like he had.
So, friends, you will NEVER regret waiting...for sex, for fondling, for kissing, even for emotional attachments...until you find a spouse. In fact, if anything, you will be so thankful that you did not bring more baggage into the relationship than you would have done so otherwise.
I am also convicted about this and that is why I am a virgin even though I am 42. I do not regret waiting and if God should bring me a spouse, I promise you that I will give my wife a precious gift that has come at a dear price to me.
If you are still a virgin, think on this: what if you and I were to meet on this site and fall in love and decide to marry and we got to the point of talking about past love relationships. When I tell you that I have waited for you all these years, wouldn't you like to reply that you have also waited? Wouldn't that be better than having to confess to me that you did not wait for me? Would I be sad if you had not kept yourself pure? I have to be honest, I would be devastated. If you only knew how hard it has been for me to wait...I would feel that all my efforts to keep the marriage bed pure were somewhat in vain...or at least I would feel sad that you would not be able to give yourself to me as I give myself to you.
I hope these words encourage you in your life of living to the glory of God. Because, in actuality, our commitment to God should be even more of a motivation toward purity...even more than that of a future spouse.
I realize that many who would read this are windowed and I consider you to be in a different category since you would not be able to be a virgin now. Even so, I hope you also are encouraged to stay pure before you marry someone else.
If you have been sexually intimate with a man outside of marriage in the past, I want you to determine if this happened after or before you were born-again:
1. If it happened after you were born-again, please consider confessing your sins (if needed) and maybe get someone to talk to about processing though the likely residual feelings. Also, please commit to another women your desire to stay pure from this day forward and invite accountability from a female friend.
2. If you were sexually intimate outside of marriage BEFORE you were born-again, I have some good news for you: you are a new creation and the old is gone. Yay! You have likely already repented of your old ways (including sexual immorality), but if you have not done so, commit to living a future life of purity until God brings Mr. right along. Your future spouse may or may not be a virgin, but if not, he should have repented of his old ways just as you have.
Lastly, if you are divorced, you will probably find that this post is WAY to simple to address your life situation. I hope you will look past my inability to speak effectively to your situation. Others will do a much better job providing words to guide and exhort.
Thanks for reading and I hope most readers will be encouraged by this!
I just today read through his again, hence the delay. To the gentleman above, I think JoJo or something, I want to let you know that I forgive you for your arrogance, name calling, accusations and ignorance. While I am shocked at the behavior from a complete stranger, I appreciate your repentance.
Therefore, as a sign of your peace and goodwill, would you mind doing me a favor and not posting on my articles any longer? (including this posting, please) I sure would appreciate it, and I am sure it will prevent future misunderstanding. Thanks.
To everyone else: Jesus and John the Baptist had very different approaches. John�s understanding of the Kingdom was different from Jesus�. John mostly preached repentance and Jesus mostly preached grace. These can be perceived very differently. Even so, Jesus commended John for being greatest among those born of women. (Matt 11:11)
We are wise to remember that there are both types in the Kingdom of God.
I just today read through his again, hence the delay. To the gentleman above, I think JoJo, or something, I want to let you know that I forgive you for your arrogance, name calling, accusations and ignorance. While I am shocked at the behavior from a complete stranger, I appreciate your repentance.
Therefore, as a sign of your peace and goodwill, would you mind doing me a favor and not posting on my articles any longer? (including this posting, please) I sure would appreciate it, and I am sure it will prevent future misunderstanding. Thanks.
To everyone else: Jesus and John the Baptist had very different approaches. John�s understanding of the Kingdom was different from Jesus�. John mostly preached repentance and Jesus mostly preached grace. These can be perceived very differently. Even so, Jesus commended John for being greatest among those born of women. (Matt 11:11)
We are wise to remember that there are both types in the Kingdom of God.
No problem. I forgive you. I have to admit that I was shocked to read a post full of arrogance, name calling, accusations and ignorance from a complete stranger, and on a Christian site, nonetheless.
Even so, I appreciate your repentance, and I forgive you for all of it. The good part for me is that I am blessed in the midst of it per Matt. 5:11-12.
Since this thread is kind of old, I wanted to bookend it. In case you read this whole thread, please know that the gentleman who posted the attacking message herein repented and apologized to me. And of course, I forgave him, because I have first been forgiven.
And as I reflect on this, I am reminded that Jesus and John the Baptist had very different approaches. John's understanding of the Kingdom was different from Jesus'. John mostly preached repentance and Jesus mostly preached grace. These can be perceived very differently. Even so, Jesus commended John for being greatest among those born of women (Matt 11:11). I would conclude that we are wise to remember that there is a place for both Jesus-types and John-types in the Kingdom of God.
While I am shocked at the behavior from a complete stranger, I appreciate your repentance.