Author	Thread: Pre-Marital Counselling?
Admin	Pre-Marital Counselling? Posted : 18 Aug, 2012 05:29 PM Hi everyone, I wasn't sure where to put this question but this forum looked to be about the closest match.... How many Pastors actually do pre-marital counselling? I know it's probably more prevalent in the US than it is here in the UK.. Is it something that pastors should insist upon prior to agreeing to marry a couple? Should it be offered as a "choice" thing for the couple? What sort of things should the Pastor be discussing? The reason I'm asking the question is that I've been reflecting on my broken marriage (it was to an unsaved husband as I got saved after marriage), one of the reasons he left was that I refused to work outside the home, I wanted to be a stay at home wife and Mum (yes, we were in a position financially where this could be comfortably done), he wanted a career woman. Please don't focus on the situation or the point of my sharing will be missed... :) Anyway, the reason for my sharing that is that as I was reflecting I realised that it would have been great if someone had sat us down before we got married and asked us our thoughts on these sorts of things to see if we were in agreement.... because what sometimes seems like a small issue can clearly turn into a big issue once married. I'm just after some opinions and answers to the questions I asked earlier in the post, to see what others think. Thanks to all who respond Hugs & Blessings Jacquie Post Reply
View Profile History	Pre-Marital Counselling? Posted : 21 Aug, 2012 05:05 AM Im not sure how sucessful premarital counseling really is. If we look at the divorce rate in the church how is it helping? We were counseld before we married. So what really is the answer? As a man the answer is me. As I matured and God began to direct my mind I realised one thing about my dates I was having. The good things I would bring to the Ladies I was dating were things they were not able to follow. As I was following God on the path I was walking they were on a different path then me. Once I stopped looking for the perfect woman and directed my focus on what direction and path women were walking it became clear what I was looking for in a woman. Its never about making a wife submit and make her walk the path I choose for her. Its about us walking in unity the path God chooses for us. I have found such Lady. Our relationship over the past year and half has been a journey of growing unity and closeness. Not closeness in the physical but all other areas of relating with oneanother. Im sure their are others that know and discovered what I understand but in general the church is clueless. What I know is not anyting ive learned from a pastor it has been my journey of discovery through listening to the great Counselor JESUS. The answer is repented men and men who know how to lead. In service of Christs body, Michael Post Reply
View Profile History	Pre-Marital Counselling? Posted : 23 Aug, 2012 03:57 PM Is it something that pastors should insist upon prior to agreeing to marry a couple? Should it be offered as a "choice" thing for the couple? What sort of things should the Pastor be discussing? I feel Pastor should suggest counceling but offered as a choice; many couples want to go to conseling. It works out well for some couples to have a better marriage. Pastor should discuss everthing from A-Z so to speak. Often times couples get married and have No clue as to what Real love is. When I got married we didnt because we were not Christians. My divorce was because of Adultry went on for some time. My ex has been married 2x again and had a couple livin women. I am sure he has learned a lot during all his failed relationships. If a man Puts God first; His wife second they can walk together in a Life that pleases God. I pray for men and women everywhere they find Christ cause many are divorced. Post Reply
okiekansas777 View Profile History	Pre-Marital Counselling? Posted : 25 Aug, 2012 04:26 AM Yes I think it is something a pastor should really have before a couple marries. He/she will ask those tough questions that couples might tippy toe around such as will a woman stay at home or not, how many children will they have or do they even want children, who will pay the bills, etc.... When in love those things can be on the back burner or you think you may know the answer, but never talked about it. But they can make or break a good marriage. Post Reply