I just finished reading the thread "Waiting on the Lord for a potential mate" and I was going to write on that thread but felt it might not get seen as much. I wanted to convey some food for thought regarding finding a mate.
First off let's examine some depressing ideas and statistics before I give some encouraging words. LOL
I do not believe that God "picks" our mates for us nor do I believe there is someone for everyone. Just by shear numbers there are more women then men and not everyone will get married or re-married. Some people, though not a commonality are given a single spirit by God and therefore will not get married. These people I believe know who they are as they do not have a desire to get married or re-married and may probably have a very low to non existent drive for "intimacy".
Then we have the other sad biblical statistic in that not all divorced people can get re-married according to God. God and Jesus His Son gave very specific allowances for divorce and RE-marriage. That is for another discussion.
Let's look at a scripture regarding a person's Free Will to marry whom they choose.
1Corinthians 7:39 A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. NKJV
""she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes""
I want you to notice that it is not God's will that prevails here but the person's will to determine who they wish to marry. Of course the only criterion God commands, His will, is that they, the prospective mate, must be a true believer. Christians are forbidden to marry someone who is not a Christian. Ladies, please hear me in this. Don't think you can find a good man and get him to convert to Christianity. Missionary dating super rarely ever works and you are more than likely asking for disaster to strike and be stuck in an un-fulfilling marriage so please spare yourself the grief. Guys...head this as well.
Let's also examine this one.
Proverbs 18:22 He who finds a wife finds a good thing, And obtains favor from the LORD. NKJV
So we see by implication that the man here is to "FIND" or in other versions "SEEK" a wife. So man should go hunting for a wife and should he find one, certainly a good catch, haha, then he will obtain favor from the Lord.
We see from both passages that we have Free Will to choose our mate. Does this mean that God is not involved in the process though? No! God is most certainly involved in the process and He certainly can bring people across our paths but so does Satan. So we have to be discerning in the choices we make.
So what do we do or should we do so God can bring someone across your path? Don't sit at home waiting for the Federal Express man or lady with an Angel by their side saying "Here this is The One". It ain't going to happen! LOL Make yourself available. Try going to Christian singles functions based out of local churches. If your's doesn't have one then go to another one or start one in your Church. Get involved in ministries with other people. Internet is OK but most people cannot re-locate. Oh and one other thing...just one little thing.... get real with your expectations of a mate. You know that laundry list of idealistic qualities.... be realistic. This is not "Fantasy Island". LOL Examine yourself and see if you meet those qualifications. Better yet...seek God's face and ask Him to help turn you into the best person you can be for the right mate.
Yes...I believe He will...but not through this site...We will meet in the Field...an Gods timin is always perfect...In the mean time...Yup ! get out there an meet people...
Walter stated ~ Oh and one other thing...just one little thing.... get real with your expectations of a mate. You know that laundry list of idealistic qualities.... be realistic. This is not "Fantasy Island". LOL Examine yourself and see if you meet those qualifications. Better yet...seek God's face and ask Him to help turn you into the best person you can be for the right mate...
Should we also add this advice to the Conversation with GOD thread you posted after posting this one...:rolleyes:...xo
My forum buddies I miss you guys...lol..I learn so much form your questions and answers. Don't stop.. lol ....:applause:
This is a subject that most people including my self avoid... Divorce, Man, Woman, Laws of God. I know God will bless me with a good husband and I am waiting for him... Everything else.. I will pray about it.. ... (call me chicken on this one but I am not touching it... lol)
you are wrong about the statistics worldwide of men and women. Statistics in China say that in the 1980s it was 9 men to 1 woman. As a result of abortion we have lost a generation of millions of women.
After 65 there is an increase in women over men largely because of smoking and drinking habits. That is changing now thanks to an increase in young women smoking more than men.
2nd you are wrong about God and choosing a mate for us. It depends on which Jesus you serve. The religious Jesus who has no power or the living God Jesus .
God often uses situations like this seeking a spouse to teach us obediance to him.
Faith is the most important aspect of our relationship to God .
Without faith we manifest no power of the Spirit of God.
If faith can move mountains it can give us the desires of our heart.
Here is the simple magic formula to having a spouse or other desires of our heart
" Seek first the kingdom of God and all of these things shall be added onto you"
king Jesus is returning for his bride so I am content that he is all things to me.
Thank you for your opinion. However I do not believe you are examining the scriptures pertinent to this discussion. Who's will determines who you marry? Is it's God's will or your will? What do the scriptures say that I posted? Do you choose your mate or does God choose your mate for you?
1Corinthians 7:39 A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. NKJV
""she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes""
Proverbs 18:22 He who finds a wife finds a good thing, And obtains favor from the LORD. NKJV
Pslam72 had good input an views here...I agree with what she has shared...
Walter I believe you are correct that ""she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes"" A women can wish all she wants...but wishes are not based in reality or scripture.
I would Hope an have Faith that on our individual journeys through life that we would be as persons...in the right/perfect place at the right/perfect time to meet that mate....
And that is what I believe GOD does as pertaining to "Bringin us a Mate"...We do choose Yah or Nah...And may we all choose Wisely based on Good Solid personal expierance an more Importantly...guideance through pray an meditation...
First off if you are going to post make sure you provide accurate statistics. Second when you are quoting from the New Testament it is important to factor in the times and who the author is talking about. The Church of Corinth was disruptive and had problems with being orderly.
Yes I agree it is better for us to be single. When one is single we are heavenly minded and our focus is on the living God. You never answered my question though about which Jesus you serve.
The Jesus of religion has no power and exists in the archives of Church and is subject to interpretation. The Living God dwells within us as the temple of the Holy spirit. So than we are the Church not a building.
If God is dwelling within us than is not every aspect of our life ordained by him. I do not believe God is random. If one studies Job in the old testament Satan had to get permission from God to go after Job. So why does God allow it because it brings us to a place where we live by faith. Not by mans interpretation.
Why is this so important. If we do not learn to live by faith we will not learn to access the power of the living God. Which brings to mind the scripture "they have a form of Godliness but deny its power."
We are entering into very hard times. If we do not live by Faith we will not survive even in our relationship with God. This is the very reason why so many fall away.
Yes we have free will but the goal is to allow the living God to replace our Old man ( flesh) so that we take on the newness of Christ.
If it is God desire that we have a mate we will. If it isn't his desire it is because he has something far greater for us. This world is temperal and perishing.
I totally disagree with Walter. I believe that if you look at the stories in the old testament God chose mates for his children. True not all people will be married, but if one of his children seek and pray to be married, and it is God's will then God will send a mate for that person.
