Author	Thread: A Little Friendly Advise Please
Admin	A Little Friendly Advise Please Posted : 24 Jan, 2011 10:40 PM I wasn't sure where to post this. There is a member on this site I am very much interested in communicating with. On one site her profile states she is available and is "so ready and excited to meet "THE ONE" that was created just for me, and I just for him... Bring him on!!!" On this site she says she has met a "wonderful Christian man." I messaged her from the other site and she told me that although she has met someone, they are still getting to know each other but she was always willing to meet and make new friends. My father always tells me if you have to ask, it's wrong; but nevertheles I still have to ask -- would I be overstepping my boundaries by asking to exchange messages with her? Her profile mirrors mine almost exactly and apparently it's alright with her, although I'm not sure about the other gentleman she is corresponding with. I have sent her a couple more messages but have yet to receive a response so maybe this question is moot. Any thoughts?
View Profile History	A Little Friendly Advise Please Posted : 24 Jan, 2011 11:17 PM I was going to message you privately with some more specific thoughts on this, but your age restrictions prevent that. Since you've stated that this person is a member of this site, I hesitate to go too in depth with my thoughts out on the forum here. So, here are my "general" thoughts. From the details you've provided, my impression is that this woman is being duplicitous. If she's truly not involved with this man on any level, then it's unlikely that she would have updated her profile with the information. I would be very cautious in messaging her when you're receiving mixed information regarding her "love life." People do remain on singles sites while they're actively dating. I was involved with someone last year and remained on the site during that time (to chat on the forums). I'm not available now either, but am still here. My profile does reflect my status and I'm very upfront with the men who message me -- reiterating that I'm not available. It seems to me like something is wrong when someone's profile essentially says that she's taken, but then she says something different in private messages.
View Profile History	A Little Friendly Advise Please Posted : 24 Jan, 2011 11:44 PM One more thing... And this should go w/out saying... but... I'm assuming that you've conversed w/ her recently. Obviously, if it's been several months since you've last spoken to her, she could have started dating someone since then. Also, perhaps you're misinterpreting her statement that she wants friends. I think that most people mean that they want to start off as "just friends" when they say that; but some people truly just mean that they only looking for casual, platonic friends. Even so, if she's in an exclusive relationship w/ someone, then you would need to tread carefully w/ developing a friendship there. Friendships can blossom into romance even when we don't intend for them to.
View Profile History	A Little Friendly Advise Please Posted : 24 Jan, 2011 11:45 PM Your Dad was right. My advice is to realize you have fallen in love with the gals profile, not the gal. Two seperate things. After all the profile gal would of answered your messages, yet the real one did not.
View Profile History	A Little Friendly Advise Please Posted : 24 Jan, 2011 11:53 PM Thank you both for you generous advise, and Miss Pixy, I'll have to look at my mail settings. Thank you gain.
SilverFire View Profile History	A Little Friendly Advise Please Posted : 25 Jan, 2011 03:10 AM Well...any way you look at it, that one's not available. That may be a real blessing if she's being intentionally duplicitous. Keep looking and pray that God will make all things clear.
IaoKim View Profile History	A Little Friendly Advise Please Posted : 25 Jan, 2011 07:41 PM Twosparrows nailed it . . . often the profile and the girl represent two very different people! Always a good idea not create any expectations based on the profile alone. :) -Anthony
View Profile History	A Little Friendly Advise Please Posted : 25 Jan, 2011 07:45 PM :waving: Hello and welcome. The others gave some good advice. You may want to keep looking.
View Profile History	A Little Friendly Advise Please Posted : 25 Jan, 2011 08:42 PM Thanks everyone for your kind advice and words of wisdom. I guess the other profile thru me off, as well as her invitation. I guess congratulations are in order to the happy couple then. :laugh:
View Profile History	A Little Friendly Advise Please Posted : 27 Jan, 2011 02:54 PM Hello everyone, This is to you Skeeterguy seeing you prefer to post this particular topic publicly. I'm thinking you were directing this to me as at the start you Wrote word for word what is in my profile & you had messaged me on another site. Skeeterguy I was Very clear in my response to you on the other site that I'm happily in a relationship with a wonderful Christian godly man, but I'm always open to making friendships. I also informed you that I rarely go on that site anymore, thus, the reason for the long delay in responding to you. You responded by congratulating me and wished me well in my relationship. edw is not only aware of the other site but he has read my profile on the other site as well. If edw or myself wanted to cultivate a friendship it would take much prayer and we would first introduce each other to this person and with God's guidance we would go from there. Both edw & I say that on our profiles that we are always open to making friendships. To all that have responded to this thread I thank you for using tact in your response's to help your brother in Christ. I also thank you for remembering there's always two sides to a situation. Pixy, I want to thank you especially as you mentioned that very point before you offered your thoughts on the topic presented. God's blessings to you all, saved3
View Profile History	A Little Friendly Advise Please Posted : 27 Jan, 2011 05:41 PM Just goes to show you just don't know all there may be to know. Skeeterguy is no longer active on cdff. He has not deleted his profile so my guess is he will be back. I see now why the Lord prompted me to respond publicly with the other Side of what took place on the other site. Even though I posted publicly, and "again" to Skeeterguy ... I'm in a relationship with a wonderful Christian godly man, edw... Seems Skeeterguy found it necessary to send edw an unsolicited Attach which was and is completely unacceptable! See the following from Skeeterguy to edw... From: Skeeterguy To:����� edw6265 Subject: I hope�I Have the correct member Dear Friend I trust I have the correct member. This is in regards to Savedbygrace3. She has a profile posted on Plenty of Fish.com, another online dating site. But according to her response, you are aware of this. If not, allow me to express my thoughts.Although I do not know her, I find myself drawn to your friend, Savedbygrace. I don't know if you are aware of this, but I suppose I have the "hometown advantage" so to speak, as Foster City is only a few minutes from San Mateo, which is a lot closer than Arkansas, where you hail from. From reading your profile, it appears Savedbygrace and I have more in common then the two of you as well. Edw, I'm going to be blunt and tell you right now that I am going to continue my pursuit in gaining Savedbygrace's friendship (in a gentlemanly fashion, of course). I'm not sure if she has informed you, but she did respond to my e-mail stating she was interested in friendship. I don't know the seriousness of your relationship as it� currently stands, but from an educated stance (something I have the upperhand on you as well) if the two of you were seriously committed, she would not have the need for the other profile (or the one on CDFF as well) and would have no desire for meeting others for "friendship" purposes.I trust my intent or strong language doesn't upset you, for after all, we are all after the same thing on here. Good luck to you Mr. Edw, and to myse

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