IMHO, I find winks confusing. I am not a huge fan of it.
I just feel like the guy is either too shy or too lazy to send a message. Eitherway, I don't know how to respond to it. Yes, I do peek at my winkers' profiles and it's sad sometimes, because though they seem nice, I just can't stop thinking that maybe they're too timid or just plain lazy. Hence, I end up not responding. Who wants a timid/lazy guy anyways?
I am just wondering if my thoughts about winks are valid.
Why do guys send winks? What do they expect out of it?
yeah I can understand why women would use the wink function. Kinda like real life when they try to get your attention so that you have to do the first move or something.
I cant understand why a guy would wink though, that's weird imho maybe it's just me . :P
I am sorry to say but most of the people on here told you exactly what winks are for and mean. And they mean nothing of what you said. I must congratulate you on actually speaking about yourself on your profile by the way. I don't know if you noticed but MOST girls on here don't give anything on their profile worthy of starting conversation about.
I send winks for the primary reason of finding out if someone is interested. If they send a message back or wink back I will write a message. I also send them because I don't want to waste time writing a message that won't be replied to. When I first got here I used to send messages, but since only one in a hundred people would reply to my messages at all I stopped bothering to write messages at all without winking first.
Honestly gals, stop expecting me to take the time to write you any message at all until you show interest. You're not going to get one because it's a waste of time to write a thoughtful message you're not going to care enough about to reply to. Also about it being polite or not, to not reply to a wink is perfectly acceptable in my opinion. A message on the other hand took time and thought and effort, so yes it can be offensive to not reply in my opinion.
It's really nice to see both perspectives. I'm glad that some guys like awakened do get what we ladies think about winks :)
I think this technology has made it very easy for guys to "approach" women. And winks made it a lot easier. But I do understand that you (@mountain) got fed up by ladies who don't reply to your well thought of messages. I really think that's mean. However, if you do come across the right girl on here, and u just sent her a wink, it's more likely that she won't reply. Just imagine the lost chance just because guys got fed up by their past experiences from those "mean" girls who didn't reply. If a girl didn't write anything on her profile like u said, but she's very pretty, and there's nothing to say if u send a message, I think guys could still send a simple "hi" to have a higher probability of getting a response.
The purpose of this thread is to know what people think about winks so I could think of the best way to respond to it.
So, like I said, based on what I've gathered, I'll probably just send back a "courtesy wink."
I do usually like the guy to make the first move. A little line or two or whatever. I'm kinda shy but love to have conversation if that makes sense...
The "winks" are what they are but they tend to turn me off and I pay little or no attention to them for some reason. I also don't really respond to a one word email like "hi." I'm not trying to sound picky but a little more than just a "hi" or a "wink" and I will at least respond to it.
Not really sure what to think about CDFF in general but that is my humble opinion regarding "winks."
It's nice that we're seeing both guys' and ladies' perspectives now.
Hopefully this thread will serve as a guide to all of us as to how to respond to winks. It's up to the dudes here whether they would stick to sending winks or exert a bit more effort by sending actual messages.
@Gloria, I used to ignore Hi's too. However, at this point, I think I will be more considerate because according to some guys here, they are just really shy. I don't want to have a timid or very shy boyfriend. However, I could still be friends with them.
The fact is we all are different personalities. Our personalities determine our perspective and approach to issues. One person may want to view a cup half-empty and another will view same cup as half-full.
Personally, I feel there are no right or wrong answers to this question because of the variance in personality types. I don't want to think when a lady refuses to respond to my wink, I should get all upset and judgmental. I'd rather want to think she's not into my type of guy; especially since we all don't have same taste and likes.
Likewise, if you get a wink from anyone or any guy, I think as a lady you want to ask yourself, am I interested in this type of a guy, (cos that's what I do as a guy when I get winks from ladies).
Lastly, I think CDFF Administrators should allow a pop up come up when that wink button is clicked to give a number of options of what various individuals might want to express when they send a wink.
Winks and messages to me, means the same especially the first message. I see it as an indication of interest. I think the response should be same as whether its a message.
I'd like to ask, do you get on to keep chatting with a guy after his first message just because its a message and not a wink?
