Author	Thread: Feeling Somewhat Broken...
Admin	Feeling Somewhat Broken... Posted : 4 Jun, 2011 10:37 PM Just for a little background...I am getting ready to start my senior year of college, and I'll be 21 in September. I have never been in a relationship, been kissed or ever even been on a date. I know a lot of you are thinking, "She's young, she's blessed enough to be in college...what does she have to be upset about?" And I agree. I am extremely blessed in my friends, my job and my family. Yet I can't help feeling broken-hearted that no one wants to be with me. Everyone tells me it's not me...but really, at this point, doesn't it HAVE to be something to do with me? I don't necessarily want a pity party. But I am tired of being the only one of my friends who has nothing to contribute to the "relationship" discussions. I feel like I try so hard to do the right things...yet come Saturday night, I'm never the one with anything to do except be a third wheel for my friends who are in relationships. At the same time, I don't want to "settle" for someone who isn't right for me or will try to force me into something I don't want to do. Do any of you have any words of encouragement? Thank you and God bless! Post Reply
bcpianogal View Profile History	Feeling Somewhat Broken... Posted : 5 Jun, 2011 03:24 PM The only words of encouragement that I have are these: you aren't the only one. I'm 28, and had my first "relationship" last year. It lasted all of three months, and was great until it totally crashed and burned. Sad thing is, I didn't see the crash coming at ALL, but later realized how blessed I was that it DID crash. Had that relationship lasted, I'd likely be married to a passive mama's boy, and living with a nut-case for a mother-in-law and a doormat for a father-in-law right about now. (Yes, I do mean living in the same house with them.) But, by God's grace I escaped with only minor bruises to my heart. Other than that, I've never even been on a date. Like they tell you, people say it's not me, but I still can't help but wonder. What is it about me that makes guys keep their distance? Is it the way I look, or is it my personality? Do I stink? lol Some guys seem to really like me. I spent about 5 hours with a totally amazing guy this morning. He lives a long ways away, but happens to be in my town for a few days. We went to church and Sunday School, grabbed a bite of lunch, and killed some time in a store before we had to part ways. I'm seeing him again tomorrow for supper and the next day for the entire day. He's great. We're good friends. But it would seem that he's not interested in dating me. I'm friendly with several guys at my church. They've had opportunities to ask me out. I'd accept if they did. But they haven't. So anyway, back to my point, it's not just you. There are others of us out there who are dealing with the same feelings and situations. (I guess I ended up saying a lot more than my original words of encouragement! Oh well...I just couldn't help myself!) Post Reply
View Profile History	Feeling Somewhat Broken... Posted : 5 Jun, 2011 08:43 PM Girl, like bcpianogirl said, you are not alone! I am in the same situation, and it can be very difficult at times - especially when June is "wedding season," and I have several weddings to attend. I, too, don't want to "settle" for just anyone. What really helps me is Jeremiah 29:11. That verse reminds me that God has a great plan for me! I don't know what will happen, when, and who may be included, but I have faith that good things will happen! Post Reply
View Profile History	Feeling Somewhat Broken... Posted : 6 Jun, 2011 10:55 AM NONE of you had better ever settle, so at least you are in the right frame of mind. You are daughters of the Most High. As I told a brother here recently, he is soooo special that I would be very disappointed if he just "settled" for a partner. That goes for all of us. When I pray for all of you here, I must admit I ask God to help you all hold out for the best. I beg Him to send His best...(I can be very possessive!) My responsibility in all of this to encourage and cheer you on! But, I believe you must know that you can be lonely in a relationship, also. In some ways, this can be more devestating than being lonely when you are unattached! As I got older, I learned more about being committed to a person. As I settled into the "kids don't need us as much" time in my marriage, I found out that many times that maturity through the stages of life does not come automatically to someone. Quite honestly, my ex never grew up. Of course, finding out he was never a Christian during our marriage had its own fallout. But I think the immaturity, coupled with drugs, and the fact that he regarded me more as his mother did him in. The gentleman I am with now through our courtship feels he is better able to be a Christian husband at this time in his life. He was actually looking for a broken person as himself because he felt there would be so much more in common. He was correct! He not only loves me, but he likes me just as I am. (He of course scores bonus points when he says he can't figure out what was wrong with my ex!) I am not wise as many here on this site. I can just share my experiences. I just have lots of feelings and convictions...and faith. I really mean for you all to "hang in there!" Hugs! Post Reply
View Profile History	Feeling Somewhat Broken... Posted : 7 Jun, 2011 03:41 AM gal,what i would say is that you are not alone ,there are sooo many out here going through the same,me included,i know that feeling of being a third wheel on weekends as like most of my friends are married leave alone in a relationship,i feel soooo lonely sometimes but i have to encourage myself in the lord,yes he knows what he has for us and also he shall recover all the years lost in joel2:25 confirms that,i wont settle for less coz everyone has someone,i know i am unique and so are you,hence lets wait for Gods time.encourage urself in the lord gal and christ wont delay his timing is perfect. Post Reply
View Profile History	Feeling Somewhat Broken... Posted : 8 Jun, 2011 04:14 PM All you girls are Awesome! !:hearts: Post Reply
View Profile History	Feeling Somewhat Broken... Posted : 9 Jun, 2011 12:12 PM I know it won't be encouraging, but the fact these dating sites exist at all is testament to the reality that it is really tough finding that special person. This is made harder in a society that encourages freedom and independence - it makes divorce a more attractive option than working things out, and more divorces mean more people wary of marrying to begin with. Which ultimately means less people willing to commit fully to dating. My advice is to meet (actually meet up, once you're sure they're not a murderer) as many people as you can. None of them might be the 'right' one, but out of the crowd, one of them may lead you to him... Post Reply
shalom716 View Profile History	Feeling Somewhat Broken... Posted : 13 Jun, 2011 05:47 AM Father, God I pray for all these young singles that you would bring the special someone for them because you know their hearts, their needs and everything about them. Father, you know where that special someone is for them and I pray that you grant their request for a friend, a lover a marriage partner in Jesus Holy Name. Thank you Father, that you are in control of all things and that you love your children and desire the very best for them. Thank you for answering this prayer according to your word as we ask we shall receive, seek and we shall find, knock and door will be come opened unto us. amen:prayingm: Post Reply
ChristianTan View Profile History	Feeling Somewhat Broken... Posted : 13 Jun, 2011 08:38 PM I've been in bad relationships and stiil felt alone and single (may as well been). Try to imagine holding Gods hand when your with your friends and you feel like the third wheel. Hope that helps! Thats what I do. I will pray for you. God obviouly doesn't think anyone is good enough or ready for you yet. There will be an amazing person for you that is looking for you right now... thats what I tell my other single friends when they get down. Not that I think happens a great deal, (or often enough) but my Mum met my stepdad on an internet dating website and they are very happy. Post Reply
View Profile History	Feeling Somewhat Broken... Posted : 15 Jun, 2011 03:53 PM Honey I'm 25 and I know exactly what you are talking about. Do not despair God is gonna honor your decision. It won't be easy that's where you wrap yourself up in Christ and wait on Him as He makes and molds you to be the very image of Himself worthy of that man who will be worthy of you also. I'm still waiting but I trust God. Trust Him and if you ever need to talk I'm here. Love you in Jesus' name. Post Reply
simplyme_jaz View Profile History	Feeling Somewhat Broken... Posted : 15 Jun, 2011 09:02 PM @youknowwho12 As you said your just turning 21 so young and pretty! If i were you enjoy first your single hood so when the right man comes your really ready for a relationship with him.If there's anyone would feel like what you feeling now it should be me,and yes i do feel that too. And get so despair and tired of people around me asking "why still single"! Im already 32 i can say im ready to settle down and maybe the man that the Lord set aside from me still not ready yet and he still preparing it for me because he wants only best for me.So hang in there learn to enjoy each new day with the LOVE of our Lord Jesus:hearts: Post Reply

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