Thread: How can we help stop someone from committing suicide ?
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How can we help stop someone from committing suicide ?
Posted : 16 Feb, 2009 03:09 PM
Friday, February 13, 2009 a man ( name unknown so I�ll use (X)sits in his truck and puts a rifle to his head, the end of his life came with a flash. The unrelenting sins of his past had slowly eaten away, at what little hope he had. The letter he left, said it so clear.
His pastor had found him before he left on his fishing trip.
On Sunday the pastor ( name unknown )went-on to say, he had just seen him earlier that same day. They passed at the store as the pastor was going in and (X) was coming out. They said �hello� but nothing more was said. (It must have taken place a few hours latter)
In his sermon he talked about how X viewed life as a party and went on to say that, �everything was ok�. The pastor said, �he felt guilty and was deeply hurt over what had happened�. That�s all I know
My hope is that we don�t tell a lot of stories here, but come to some kinda forum that may help someone reading this, that is also contemplating ending their life but are too afraid to reach-out.
My thoughts;
It seemed as though the pastor was helping X as he lived close by.
I don�t think the pastor should feel guilt. We can�t read minds !
But I do feel saddened over X�s lack of hope and angered by his action because he hurt the people in his life and the people that loved him. He had the opportunity to reach out to God, his family and on the last day, his pastor but he chose not to.
I believe that God had sent the pastor to cross his path on that day. So that tells me that X had made up his mind and put blinders on to any help that God had sent him.
Even Jesus couldn�t save every man from themselves as portrayed by the other men on the cross. Jesus told one of them that he would be with him in paradise on that day.
What about the other man ? The man didn�t reach out !
God has made me realize that the most important things on this planet, are the people and the ones we love, not the things we have or had. So when I�m feeling down, I take walks and immerse myself in God�s show of love(Nature) and pray. I also take one day at a time and find peace in His word and in knowing tomorrows another day, a new adventure, a new beginning.
Please add your comments to this and tell us how you make it through a bad day.
God be with you all and please add his family to your prayers.
How can we help stop someone from committing suicide ?
Posted : 16 Feb, 2009 07:07 PM
Ahh, this is a really touchy subject for me. The person that I am the closest with in this entire world (a family member) tried to kill himself.
I was the one to get his phone call and I thank the Lord that I answered that call at that moment - because to tell you the absolute truth I know that there is no one else in this world that he would have called. And if he didn't get a hold of me, he could possibly be dead.
He was super depressed & drinking HEAVILY and downing pills out of a bottle like it was a shotglass. So, I just said I'm hanging up right now and calling 911, and I hung up on him that second. Met the cops & ambulance there and then met them at the hospital where they were starting to take care of him.
That's the short version but it was terrifying. The Lord blessed me that day and made sure I answered that call. And the Lord blessed 'that person' with a second chance at life. Things still to this day are not easy, but it is better than the alternative.
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A person doesn't usually just open up and say that they are planning this type of thing either.
Here are some signs for people to watch for, and we need to watch closely:
-making a will
-getting affairs in order
-suddenly visiting family members or friends (one last time)
-withdrawl from family/friends
-buying weapons or medications
-changes in sleeping patterns
-improvement in mood or a worse mood than usual
-anxiety/nervousness/hopelessness/irritability
-alcohol abuse
-insomnia (fatigue, loss of energy)
-unconcerned with physical health
-loss of interest in usual activity
-giving away a prized possession
-writing a suicide note
Those facts taken from medicinenet.com and stopasuicide.org
A person could be showing one or any variation of these behaviors. Obviously that is not a complete list - it goes on and on. And I think we all kind of know what major signs to watch for, but I don't think it hurts to have a little reminder.
But, being on the other end of that phone call, I wish I would have noticed some signs earlier - or made that connection.
GW, I agree with you that most people who do commit suicide do already have their minds made up. And if they show minimal or no signs before that, other people do not know. We can not blame ourselves, we can feel hurt, but self-blame will never bring that person back. What I feel a person should to do is pray that God is merciful to that person's soul.
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To answer the other part of your question, I don't really have 'bad days'. I try to keep busy everyday and not give myself the time to sit around & let a bad or depressed mood hit. I always "shake it off" and deal with things the best I can. I guess I just try not to let things get to me.
I like to just think positively & not negatively. Also, I like to exercise a lot and I think that helps me clear my mind.
And, I pray everyday for strength & guidance, and I thank God everyday for His blessings, and ask Him to help me with any issue. I have recently asked Him to help me with something and He made it easier for me than I could have ever imagined.
How can we help stop someone from committing suicide ?
Posted : 17 Feb, 2009 02:29 PM
Thank you Angel, for the links and your thoughts.
But you�ve obviously had some bad times or you wouldn�t know how to prevent yourself from falling back into the depths of depression. Everyone goes there at sometime in their life. pulling yourself up and making sure that you sustain from things, places or people that will grease the tracks on your own personal gains, is I consider, the best way to move
forward.
I believe that men are different from women, in as they want to fix it themselves. Whereas a woman will most likely have a friend they can call and confide in them.
Fear = False Evidence Appearing Real.
( Don�t listen to a negative voice especial your-own )
Love = Does conquer all
( God is love and knowing He loves you, will defeat all negative emotions )
Hope = a baby
( Remembering the innocents of our youth and the things we love to do )
Laughter = kills depression dead in it�s track�s.
( watch comedies, listen to joyful music, exercise your way back to health )
These are just a few things that make us stronger and when depression rears it�s ugly head, these things should be held closer to the heart. Reach-out for strength in God�s words.
Things that make us weak:
Smoking, Alcohol, Junk-food, Drugs, over-the-counter as well and sugar is a drug.
These things, I consider to be the most damaging to a strong, balanced mind and body and should be avoided at all cost.
If your not enough of a person with-out them, you�ll never be enough, with them.
So please, quit smoking first.
The peace and joy you seek, is not found in the mood-altering drugs you take.
You can�t be �your� true-self with them. So please start with being �true� to yourself and Remember you�re not alone, find the strength to reach-out when you need to.
God and your loved-one will be there for you, always.:yay:
How can we help stop someone from committing suicide ?
Posted : 18 Feb, 2009 07:22 PM
Hi GW,
Some good, uplifting points in your last post and also some informing.
Yes, I have been through hard times, so has everyone on this earth at one point or another in their life (and completely different problems). But really it all comes down to the way the person deals with their issues.
Do they turn to a bottle, harm someone else, let that problem build up and snap on someone, etc.?
Those just aren't rational things to do & they sure don't help any problem, in the least...
It really blows my mind to think that someone can make that decision to take their own life - because more than that person ever EVER hurt, they are causing an even greater hurt to the people who loved them...whether they will ever know that or not.
I feel like a person who actually would go all the through with killing themselves feels as if there is no one on this earth they can turn to and that's really sad. Otherwise they have brought their problems up with someone and they didn't feel it helped. Or to go even deeper, their relationship with God was non-existant or suffering - or maybe even they were questioning their faith? Who knows...
I see your point about what you said about men & women, but with suicidal thoughts it's not always the case. It's usually a complete shock to those around that person...that's where the self-blame comes from.
I may be different from most women being that I keep my problems to myself - that's just what has worked for me. But I'll be there in a second if someone else needs me.
How can we help stop someone from committing suicide ?
Posted : 19 Feb, 2009 01:21 AM
Hi� GW1225
I disagree with your opinion that said �even Jesus couldn�t save every man from themselves as portrayed by the other man on the cross.�:peace:
I meant, if really Jesus couldn�t save every man it means that Jesus is not the Lord.
The fact, Jesus is the Lord. He could and would help us.
God gives us choices. So, every one of us has choices even Jesus has His choices but the point is what choice that we choose.
Do you still remember when Jesus prayed in Gethsemane? Jesus chose to do what Father�s will, because He loves us.
Because of God�s love so we who live in this world still have chance to make our choice.
I think the other man on the cross (next to Jesus) did have choices; to make up his opinion unto Jesus or to stand up on his own opinion, because at the time he said bad to Jesus, Jesus or he not yet died. It was still hours until Jesus or he died. So, Jesus gave him a chance to make up before his died but the man chose to keep on his opinion.
I thank God we have Jesus.
But i do agree with your some other opinions.
And for your question how I make it through a bad day,
Well �.. I will sing praise n worship in my heart every time and in everything I do because I believe praise and worship have power �. to break each burden that i had.
I am just a copy cat of Paul and Silas.
Miranda....
I think people are happy to have you around them �.:applause::applause:
How can we help stop someone from committing suicide ?
Posted : 19 Feb, 2009 09:17 AM
February 19, 2009
Hello Miranda:waving:
Let�s take a look at what you disagree with:
I disagree with your opinion that said �even Jesus couldn�t save every man from themselves as portrayed by the other man on the cross.� I meant, if really Jesus couldn�t save every man from themselves, it means that Jesus is not the Lord.
my reply:
Satan (knew) God and had the free-will and choice to go against Him
That didn�t make Him, not God.
Nor does it make Jesus, not the Lord, for not forcing someone to believe in Him. Jesus can�t and won�t save every person from themselves. because if He did, then there is no-more free-will and without free-will, were nothing more than slaves to any master.
God and Jesus want us to Choose Them over all, not to be forced to.
And that�s why I used the word, �couldn�t.�
We could even go a little deeper and talk about why God put that dang-o�-tree in the garden, in the first place. But I believe He wanted us to be different from animal�s and not His slaves. So He knew we were going to eat the fruit and gain knowledge.
Thank you for pointing that out and your kind words &thoughts about the
How can we help stop someone from committing suicide ?
Posted : 19 Feb, 2009 09:54 AM
This reminds me of a joke I heard, please bare with me I usually mess them up.
There�s a man standing on his porch and the flood waters are to his ankles.
A pastor walks by and tells the man to get out, the floods are coming. The man replies, �I�m waiting for God to save me. Then the waters rise up to the mans waist and a policeman tells him to leave, again he replies, �I�m waiting for God to save me.� So the policeman left. Then the water was up to the mans neck and a fireman in a boat came by, he yelled reach-out your hand and climb in, but the guy said, �no thanks, I�m waiting for God to save me.� Well he drowns and when he�s standing before God he asks, God why didn�t you save me ? and God replies, �I sent the pastor, the cop and the fireman what more did you want ?�
Sometimes all we have to do is reach-out and the help we seek, is right in front of us.
How can we help stop someone from committing suicide ?
Posted : 19 Feb, 2009 04:12 PM
d33,
I understand what you are saying, but there is something that most people don't consider about this scripture. Jesus told him that he would be with Him in Paradise, otherwise known as Abraham's Bosom ( See Luke 16:19-31). This was a place for the dead to go until the gates of Heaven were opened.
Jesus, when He died, went to Sheol, the grave, Paradise, whatever you want to call it, and gave them all a chance to believe. We believe that the thief accepted Jesus because of his words on the cross, but we don't really know.
It is like having a pitcher of water on the table and dying of thirst, that is not the fault of the water. It is the fault of the person refusing to drink. Under normal circumstances, God will not hold you down and pour it down your throat, but this does not make Him any less God.
How can we help stop someone from committing suicide ?
Posted : 19 Feb, 2009 09:28 PM
Thanks for the scripture and your clear description of what I was trying to say.
There was another scripture that you wrote about Leon, in another thread. You where talking about a persons calling. I hope you recall that and can share that scripture with me again. I can't seem to find it
How can we help stop someone from committing suicide ?
Posted : 20 Feb, 2009 12:55 AM
GW,
There are a couple of scriptures that i use a lot when talking about callings. I am including the two I use the most, if these are not them, let me know and I will find the one you are talking about
Romans
8:28
And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.
8:29
For whom He foreknew, He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, that He might be the firstborn among many brethren.
8:30
Moreover whom He predestined, these He also called; whom He called, these He also justified; and whom He justified, these He also glorified
Romans
11:29
For the gifts and the calling of God are irrevocable.
