Ok i'll bite( not really) I have dated like 8 guys from here and all except one has claimed that they were in love with me and shut their accounts down even before we went out on the first date. Even though I am flattered by this, and it shows me that they are willing to give us a chance, I dont understand this practice of saying I love you. k.ayn
Well I have to put in my toosense here (I know, I know - i've been posting like mad here today)
Men and women (apparently) mean very different things by the words "I love you" except when they're actually married.
We had one of our speakers at DTS explain it - "Guys: When you say 'I love you' what the ladies here is 'I am commited to you.'"
I'll let you ladies chime in here, but in the class, he asked the ladies, and they agreed.
Men instinctively want to say "I love you" when they have strong feelings for a woman. It does not necessarily mean commitment. Unfortunately, this is one area where c-o-m-m-u-n-i-c-a-t-i-o-n between menz and womenz gets derailed.
in fact, I had one friend take a step farther: "You should not tell a woman you love her, unless the next words coming out of your mouth are 'Will you marry me?'"
I don't know if I agree with that or not. I guess I'll toss this back to the ladies - even though this is in the "Ask a guy" forum, I think this is a very important question for the ladies:
What do you hear when a man says "I love you" to you? What does that mean to you? How do you translate that?
Oh - and K.Ayn; are you familiar with scammers? What you're describing sounds to me like scammers - see the post under "Advice on love and dating" and the post titled "You think you got a scammer?"
Scammers are people who post fake profiles on here, approach people (when they approach the ladies, they seem to lay it on thick - "Hey baby - you're beautiful") and try to get them to give them money. They use pilfered photos from romance sites.
if a man says i love you, i'm not expecting a ring or lifetime commitment. i am expecting that we are NOT on dating web sites, looking around, dating other people. and we do something weekly and talk every few days, which is my definition of "commitment" for single people.
After being married for 26 years, and being divorced because he wanted to be single (turned 50, etc.), it would take more words than I LOVE YOU, for me to consider a ring that i didn't buy for myself.
