Thread: Reluctance to give out phone number> What does it mean?
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Reluctance to give out phone number> What does it mean?
Posted : 17 Sep, 2009 07:29 PM
I understand why ladies are reluctant to give out their phone numbers...>staulkers & guys who won't stop calling after they have been asked not to - so enough said about that..... But I need some input from the ladies on this issue...As a man not only is it frustrating but it is also hard not to feel insulted or dishonored by that.....After all, who likes the fact the the woman IS insinuating that you might be a staulker or will continue calling after you have been asked not to.:devil: Gee wiz mam, well thanks a lot!
Give me a break. Most of the women I have written live in other states. Even if she is a poor judge of character - how is it that she can be worried about giving me her phone number?? - Especially when in a lot of cases they have given me their personal email address - which also gives me their last name in most cases...???
Perhaps I am naive.. (no doubt apparently) ...I typically expect a woman (especially a Christian to be honest) but a lady friend here insists it is because they have something to hide..Daaaa:dunce: - but you know over the years having probably 15 women since my teenage years - I think only one of them was a liar. Are there that many women liars on this site??????
Reluctance to give out phone number> What does it mean?
Posted : 23 Sep, 2009 01:11 AM
Might seem minor but I need to correct my last statement, but I would only send money to a lady I met here if I knew her well which would mean for me that I spent quite a bit of time talking to her on the phone, in most cases.
As I have indicated in other forums if not here, from my point of view a lot of the reluctance to give out phone numbers is just flakiness or paranoia - because it's taken to extremes.People can dress it up any way they want but it doesn't change the nature of what it is.
WHY THE TELEPHONE?? RATHER THAN EMAIL
The telephone - especially if there is or seems to be a basis for a friendship - is 10 times a better way to communicate than by email. It eliminates a lot of misunderstanding and saves a lot of time. Apparently, we men hate wasting time a whole lot more than women do - AND WE DO HATE WASTING TIME - LIFE IS SHORT. Why should I have to spend a couple of weeks and hours sending silly little emails - only to find out that we are not a match and/ or the woman is a total flake - when I could figure that out in most cases within about 30 minutes on the phone or less, most of the time.
Not only that but we men become rather annoyed by all of that unecessary nonsense. It's retarded and few of us men have the time or patience for it.
Oh that's another thing - women tell us to BE PATIENT..what that means is they want us to be patient with retarded nonsense because they want to be flakey. I am not having it - and very few real men will.
Frustrated with the situation here? A bit but its more about hating pure stupidity - and I also do not need any advice on how to deal with it. I know how to deal with it - I AM NOT PUTTING UP WITH ANY MORE WOMEN LIKE THAT ANYMORE!!:yay::laugh:
Reluctance to give out phone number> What does it mean?
Posted : 23 Sep, 2009 08:10 AM
Below is what I just posted on my profile. May be it will help one or two of the ladies out there. Actually theres no doubt about it because - I guarantee most men feel that way, whether or not they have taken time to narrow it down or put it into words. Pretty much already said these things, but this is may be a little more concise.
WHY REAL MEN HATE EMAILING - EMAILING VS. THE TELEPHONE
1. Overall, it is one heck of a bad way to get to know someone � and a horrible way to communicate. It�s extremely easy to miss ones meaning because there is not the benefit of hearing the other�s voice inflection.
INSTANT MESSAGING IS A LOT BETTER THAN REGULAR EMAILING BUT � but it is still a far cry from a telephone call.
2. Life is short and we hate wasting time. We do not like spending weeks and sending a ton of emails to find out that the woman we have been wasting all of that time on is far from being what we want or need in a mate � when in a lot of cases that could have been determined in one or two phone calls.
3. We know that pretty much a woman who makes us go through all of that nonsense has big issues. She does either not trust the guy who is emailing her � or she does not trust herself. She is operating in fear and not in faith. In worldly terms � she is flakey
Reluctance to give out phone number> What does it mean?
Posted : 23 Sep, 2009 08:31 AM
TO SILVERSTAR: SCAMMER PROFILES
First thing I look at is whether they write using small "i"s instead of capitol "I"s. Most I have run into have poor English skills
I look for other inconsistencies - One of the biggest giveaways is when they say they were raised in the US and or they have a 4 yr degree or better and cannot even speak
(read & write) at an 8th grade level.
A lot of the time the will be VERY POETIC in their profiles.
Sometimes bizarre or stupid Profile names will also give clues.
If you are not sure whether or not someone is a scammer ask for their phone number (doesn't mean you have to give them yours). IF they live outside the US but their profile says they live here (they are usually overseas) that will shut them up really fast - or they just will make excuses for why they ca not do it. Secondy ask for childhood photos. They will not be able to produce those either.
Reluctance to give out phone number> What does it mean?
Posted : 23 Sep, 2009 11:52 AM
No - this is what I mean: (This is a real email I got on Myspace)
"Hello Pretty, Hopefully you had a good and beautiful day... I am Mcdaniel JOHNSON.. ..i was born right in us Washington DC, am 5.9ft tall and 153pounds,love to make friends with people and I love putting a smile on the faces of people every time ... ..... I saw your profile when i was looking in through the member goofing research ...watch your loving cute smiling face on the photo and I think that you are cute attractive pleasan Hello....t to 'eye and an feel I should leave a note for you. .. (Doux) to express my feelings let me say you really look so attractive, cos there are some people u can never fail to notice cos of their shinning qualities..u must really be a nice person cos u really look pretty....And although we can get to chat on instant messaging, Mine is ([email protected]) Am on Yahoo Messenger Now I am online or you write me a note here or via my box i will wait to Heard from you so we can better chat online."
1.) His profile description was in perfect English - no grammatical or spelling errors whatsoever.
2.) I had a joke picture up (the only one I had up) with Mr. Bean's face imposed on a woman's body. Not at all pretty.
3.) I stick with my original post that if someone gives you their email address in the very first contact they make with you, 9 times out of 10, they are a scammer. Especially if the rest of the message is in broken English.
Reluctance to give out phone number> What does it mean?
Posted : 23 Sep, 2009 01:29 PM
Linnie
You actually saved that:laugh: or going by memory?
That was a good one. I didn't see any indicators in there that he was a scammer - except the IM thing at the end - that is a lot more an indication of someone being a scammer. One who had me fooled for a while, first time I went on a dating site a few years ago, also sent me a similar one and in perfect English. A female of course - or said to be.
But I guess you could be right about the 90% being scammers who give out emails on the first one - because I am probably a little more bold/candid (whatever you want to call it) than most guys and I probably - almost never, come to think about it, give out my personal email on the initial contact - however I often do if there is any positive response to my initial email. But my first "reply" will often contain my personal email and on rare occassion my phone number also.
Reluctance to give out phone number> What does it mean?
Posted : 23 Sep, 2009 02:02 PM
Yes - I saved it. This is one of them that I played with. I'll send you the whole correspondence - it's pretty funny.
I guess it's a lot of things combined, plus experience with them that makes them easy to pick out to me. I've been given email addresses by people that weren't scammers, too - I think you're right about the IM address - it seems if they want to talk to you away from the site you're on, that's a sure sign, too. They know they're going to be reported, so they want to get you to a different place - one they can't be kicked off of.
Reluctance to give out phone number> What does it mean?
Posted : 25 Sep, 2009 01:19 AM
i know im slow to reply not been on line. but I can tell you that I rarely give out my number. If I do i start with my cell number that can not be tracked back to my addresss. I HAVE had a man search for me vie my phone number and show up at my door unannounced. it is VERY upsetting. There is a way around this.. give her your number and tel her she can call yoyu and block caller ID.this might help both of you feel better about the talk..
