Author	Thread: Pattern Continues
musician47 View Profile History	Pattern Continues Posted : 8 Dec, 2022 04:52 PM This really isn't anything out of the ordinary, but FWIW, I'll stick it on here. I started chatting with a lady on a Malaysian island a few weeks ago. As with all, she started out being very nice and saying things like she wished she had've been born in the US so we could meet, I had nice looking parents, she would cook delicious meals for me etc. But times were hard for her, she was having to move every year, and just a lot of "If it weren't for bad luck, I'd have no luck at all" stuff. It got to where the "Morning"'s and Good evenings soon dropped,d (she would just let in griping with the first sentence of every email) then first thing I knew, her emails became so depressing and complaining, (about me mostly!) it was becoming unpleasant to read. I did all in my power to give her encouragement, support, even prayed for her, but it cut no ice. It meant nothing to her. She attended two churches, yet I couldn't see God in her words. Knowing times were bad, I offered to not write as often, and she snapped back, "do as you choose" (That was the same dry, tacky wording she used when I told her I had printed off her picture). I reached the point I was tired of having my caring and kindness thrown back in my face, with no gratitude from this "poor soul" at all, only anger and bitterness. It blew up, with her blocking me, me blocking her, and I see where she deleted her account here. At least she had enough good sense to do THAT. That tells me she may have an inkling that she does indeed have issues rooted deep. The in common thing to this one and the other one who had me crying for a week, was this one single thing: Both of them had lived through a horrendous marriage, emerging full of hate and bitterness, probably toward all men, possibly without even realizing it. That's where their replying to me and being nice "at first" is a big mystery. Both this one and the other one last summer had bad marriages, divorced or not. Instead of seeking counseling first, THEN coming on a dating site, they hit the dating site circuits first, doing it all in reverse. This is not a counseling site nor is it a site to take your bad marriages out on men or women, whichever sex it happens to be who was done wrong. One thing in common for me, the more caring and nice I am to these kind, the quicker they turn on me like snakes. I can't/won't do it again. This last one did it. I have a caring compassionate heart as God wants us to, but it cuts no ice with a broken human being who no more belongs here than playing in 5:00 traffic. This is NOT the place to come if you are coming out of, or are IN a bad marriage. GET COUNSELING FIRST (THERAPY) Get straightened out, get well, THEN think about joining a dating site. We are here to meet someone for a friendship, marriage, or whatever God wills NOT to be a cat to kick, a whipping boy or target for your pent up aggression and bitterness, coming out of a bad marriage where you hate your ex with a purple passion. Thank you all for allowing me my thoughts on this very sad epidemic I am seeing here. Post Reply
Moonlight7 View Profile History	Pattern Continues Posted : 8 Mar, 2023 05:28 AM Many Divorced men put single status on here. They also have children. A man with separated status, is seeking a marriage partner. I messaged him about it and he got an attitude. This site needs to clean house! Or change title to Secular dating. :⁠-⁠) Post Reply

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