Author Thread: disability views...
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disability views...
Posted : 10 Nov, 2008 09:26 PM

I'm wondering how people feel about those with psychiatric problems, those who have been in "mental" hospitals and on medications,etc.

Some of the kindest, most genuine people I have ever met have had the aforementioned.

They also did not have significant others.

How much of a stigma is attached with disability?

I was recommended to try online dating because my social skills and tics scare women.And my anxiety,etc. makes it very difficult to leave my apartment.



thanks

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Posted : 13 Nov, 2008 10:28 PM

hey aspie,



first just to let you know you posted this in the ask a guy section in think you meant to put it in ask a girl, so i would suggest reposting it in there to get the reaction from the women.



my own viewpoint is that as far as women go i've never known anyone who has had a disability to my knowledge, not an obvious one anyway, i've worked with many children who had varying different disabilities but that didn't involve attraction so i couldn't really say anything from my own personal experience.



the only thing that i can really say is that i think that quite often there can be a barrier due to peoples upbringing, or tv etc. but i'd put any barriers down to a lack of understanding, we are often fearful of things we don't understand and don't always like people who force us to change our views or thoughts etc...

but i think whether someone is sceptical about disabilities, or put off bu them for whatever reason, i think it's really no different to anyone else.



physical attraction is like putting your foot in the door, it just gives you the oppurtunity of the next step, but it's not necessary, i know that in a relationship what i look for is someone who understands me, and who i can understand, attraction is not important.



i don't think that you should worry about it, just keep looking for someone who understands you, don't let having a disability hold you back, and don't think of it as a problem, just know that if a girl is put off by it and doesn't want to get to know you better because of it then she isn't the right girl for you, and you should keep searching.



you're no different than the rest of us, i haven't got a disability, but i'm still haven't found the right girl for me yet thats just the way that it is, just be patient, make sure you have a couple of good friends, enjoy life and what will be will be all in good time.



all the best wishes.

x

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angela_lee101

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Posted : 17 Nov, 2008 07:22 PM

wow as a girl i totally agree with the last post i wasn't going to post anything but i thought i would say that in my opinion if they have a problem with you then you shouldn't let that become your problem...i know it can be frustration but remember that God loves you and thats all that really matters once you know that everything else will fall into place...it may take a while but it will happen :D



God Bless

Angie

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Posted : 18 Nov, 2008 10:41 AM

First of all It can be hard to be disabled I have been through the mental ward or psychiatric department a few times and all they seem to do is listen to you complain about problems and prescribe pills, Either because it was all they were taught in med school or because they love money 1 Timothy 6:10 For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.

(To make a psychitrist srcratch his head tell him you think taking pills is depressing)

Plus not all people should marry marriage is a life time commitment you as the husband need to provide for your family. You need to be able to work out your problems not run away from them and how to raise your children in a christ like manner so they don't become worldly. I mean their probably are some disabled people who can handle the responcibilites of marriage and provide for their family, Online dating is pretty much the same risk as regular dating except if someone is posing as some one their not you put yourself in great danger and high risk of only God knows what the person on the other end of the computer is capable of. I strongly suggest you put dating and marriage on hold untill you can get a steady job and get a handle on your fear of going out. Matthew 10:16 Behold, I send you forth as sheep in the midst of wolves: be ye therefore wise as serpents, and harmless as doves. Council with your pastor and your parents and maybe a couple of close friends you really trust about dating not strangers on the internet

and if you take any advise be very careful about what advise you take.

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