Author	Thread: disability and dating
Admin	disability and dating Posted : 24 Feb, 2011 11:36 AM I suffer from depression and anxiety. I still live with my mom and I don't drive because of my anxiety. Whenever I tell a girl this, they suddenly lose interest and just wants to be friends or stops talking all together. Would you date me, knowing I had these problems? How soon should I bring this up? Post Reply
View Profile History	disability and dating Posted : 24 Feb, 2011 11:47 AM friend why tell herright away?????? Depression is a state of mind. If you concentrate on the good things in life the bad pass away.When dating a woman if you have fun with her are you depressed?????? get a hobby. It is a fact that pets cure depression,I have 4 cats. Post Reply
View Profile History	disability and dating Posted : 24 Feb, 2011 05:04 PM I hope you know why women lose interest. When entering into a relationship, you have to ask yourself, what am I bringing to it? If you are anxious and afraid, how will you be your wife's protector? Her covering? If you are depressed, that is the opposite of the joy you should have which is one of the fruit of the spirit. I didn't say any of that in judgment, they are hard truths and the reason why women gon on bout their business. It will not matter when you tell her, those are not qualities women are looking for. The good news is that by His stripes we were healed. You don't have to stay in this condition. Fear is a spirit, and just like you at some point accepted it, you can can fall out of cooperation with it. The devil is afraid of YOU and is terrified that you would ever find out who you are. Post Reply
Firehawk View Profile History	disability and dating Posted : 24 Feb, 2011 07:57 PM I know this is in the Ask a Girl forum, but my biggest concern is the fact you don't drive and still live with your mom. How can you be the leader, protector, and provider of the household? You are not showing any independence. Though 1babygirl, I will have to disagree with you on the depression thing. It seems that you view depression is a sin. Honestly, there are many people in Scripture that had times of depression (for example Job, Habakkuk, and Jeremiah just to name a few). And now where does the Scripture mention it being a sin. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6tyfAwfev6A&p=3C23A8E1095BF2C4 Post Reply
Elisa View Profile History	disability and dating Posted : 25 Feb, 2011 12:52 AM I come from a different culture. For an adult to live with the parent is actually positive rather than negative most of the time. So, within that framework, if you find a lady, are you planning on her living with you and mom? In the American culture, that could present a bit of a challenge. Are you helping your mother and taking care of her or vice versa? If you are a care giver, can you support your family, mother, wife and children included? If you are being cared for by your mother, how does she feel about the introduction of another person into her home? These are all aspects that merit consideration. As an aside, living in my own skin, I happen to know that some females can be a bit vexing (and confusing) to the world on occasion. If you are struggling with depression, are you ready to add in the stresses of a relationship with the completely logical and oh so practical opposite sex who of course speaks the same language (at least with other females)? These are just some thoughts. By no means am I advocating any course of action. You know yourself and where you are on your walk with God better than anyone else. Best wishes in your search for your heart's desire. Post Reply
View Profile History	disability and dating Posted : 25 Feb, 2011 01:13 PM You'll probably think this is funny, but whenever I see a disability, because of my love of natural ways and herbs, I start thinking of what could help!!! Have you been like this all your life? Post Reply
Ruth4 View Profile History	disability and dating Posted : 25 Feb, 2011 08:40 PM I totally agree with Firehawk. Women are looking for the men in lives to be leader, protector, and provider of the household. I know we all have our struggles in life. Maybe there are steps you can take to overcome your depression and anxiety. If your not now, maybe you can talk to a counselor about your depression and made take some antidepressants for the depression and for the anxiety. Maybe they can find what is the underlining cause as to why you feel depressed. I know i myself have suffered from depression many years. Yet i knew there were steps i had to take to overcome it. N trust me it takes time, it is a process, and sometimes it comes back, but I put my trust in God and His Word. I couldnt live my life in fear if i wanted to make progress in my life and change for the better. There are also steps you can take to establish more independence. You can accomplish a lot more in your life but sometimes the enemy makes us believe we cant he put thoughts into our minds such as" you will never make it, you cant" and thats how depression overcomes us. But you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you!:applause: Post Reply
View Profile History	disability and dating Posted : 26 Feb, 2011 07:25 AM What's up Firehawk? I would have come back to answer sooner had I known someone had written to me directly. I do not view depression as a sin. I merely was stating that depression is the exact opposite state God has us striving toward. Joy is on the opposite side of that equation. Many ppl who don't understand strongholds and spiritual oppression, try to treat a spiritual things with natural remedies. Now meds do help to a certain extent by alleviating some of the physical symptoms, but they never get to the root of the problem. Post Reply
Firehawk View Profile History	disability and dating Posted : 26 Feb, 2011 12:23 PM 1babygirl, I do agree with your statement about joy being the fruit of the spirit, but my problem is that joy is not the opposite of depression. Many saints in the Bible experienced times of depression, yet they still had joy. I link depression to more of an emotional root. Now don't get me wrong, emotions are effected by the spirit and the physical too and the roots should be dealt with. Also, no where in Scripture does it say that God wants us to be happy all the time. It definitely says to be joyful, but not happy. Take, for example, Jeremiah. He was referred to as the weeping prophet. His life was miserable. He was in a constant state of depression and that was God's will for his life. Similarly with Job's life. Job lost everything yet still loved God. He was very depressed during his low times, yet still trusted God. Post Reply
View Profile History	disability and dating Posted : 26 Feb, 2011 01:08 PM Definition of depression: a condition of general emotional dejection and withdrawal; sadness greater and more prolonged than that warranted by any objective reason. That right there was sent straight from the pit. The times that the ppl in the Word were sad, dejected or depressed (the best example being Job)they were not where they should have been (emotionally) or were struglling with their faith. Not saying that we don't all experience times of great sadness, we all do. My break-up with my ex and divorce had me down for about a minute. But if I was still sad (depressed) 4 years later, that would be a stronghold and oppression. I am also not saying we should be happy all the time. That would be a crazy thing to say. I don't believe that you can be depressed and have joy at the same time, not according to the above definition. You can be unhappy with circumstances and your life as it is and still have joy, that is true. I've experienced that myself. I hope I have explained myself better than before. Post Reply
Firehawk View Profile History	disability and dating Posted : 26 Feb, 2011 03:58 PM 1babygirl, I understand were your coming from. My perspective is more dealing with the emotional side. My point was to destroy this fallacy that Christians have to be always happy (different than joy), maybe to the point of ignoring reality and I think that is bad. The other thing is that some people assume that depression is just medical condition, rather than a emotional. It's both. I was going off the Webster's definition 2b(1), but acknowledge that there is a clinical side - definition 2b(2): 2: an act of depressing or a state of being depressed: as b (1) : a state of feeling sad : dejection [lowness of spirits] (2) : a psychoneurotic or psychotic disorder marked especially by sadness, inactivity, difficulty in thinking and concentration, a significant increase or decrease in appetite and time spent sleeping, feelings of dejection and hopelessness, and sometimes suicidal tendencies. Post Reply

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