How important is it to date a good Christian woman? specifically my pastor speaks of me only needing to marry in the church (he means Pentacostal/Apostolic). I'm wondering if its ok to date outside of the church? I'm hoping that when i do ever find someone she would atleast consider coming to church with me, but if she doesn't is that ok?
And as for her only being Pentacostal/Apostolic, its hard enough for me to find someone i DO like.
I'm just wondering if you ladies could give me some advice?
I just read what you wrote and it brought back memories...I got saved in that church. No make up, no jewelry and no pants...I still only wear a dress or skirt to church ..But I no longer feel like people who come to church in pants are not saved (joke)
When I first got saved I was 16 and my mom was an Avon rep so she bought me jewelry and I could wear a little make up. I went to church one Sunday and was told that demons would enter me from wearing make up and jewelry. Another time our chior was singing and I had on a long dress with my shoulders (not covered) and was asked to come out of the chior that night.
I could go on and on....I syill visit the church when I go home I love the people and the worship...I do not agree with everything but I do respect them and their worship...Holiness is God's standard of living for his people....That was drummed into us
i know this was ask a girl , but... it is important that you and your future wife are compatible, but as to different denominations it should not matter, if we as believers add extra requirements, that are outside the bible is that not adding to the word of god which is not good, we should be able to put aside our denominational difference for the sake of unity as Paul tells us in Ephesians 4 we need to seek unity, not denominations! a house divided against its self can not stand!
Eph 4:1 I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called,
Eph 4:2 with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love,
Eph 4:3 eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.
Eph 4:4 There is one body and one Spirit--just as you were called to the one hope that belongs to your call--
Eph 4:5 one Lord, one faith, one baptism,
Eph 4:6 one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.
first off, my pastor really does give me scripture to support anything he preaches.? ok =]
umm no .. he just says that its ummm Recommended in order to live a holy life. i just learned that a woman should not wear what pertains to a man. neither should a man wear what pertains to a woman.. like I'll never be caught dead wearing a dress :P
as for hair, yea its a womans crown, and suppose to be for Her glory, and is a sign of submission to the husband.
(frankly i dont care if her hair is cut, but God does so, well i'll just go by what he says =] )
and idk the scripture but i've been preached to that women shouldn't wear make-up and jewlery. (now its just me i really do think women who don't wear any make up tends to be prettier by comparison :P...sry if that offends anyone lol)
and as for cloths ive been given (not that i remember :P) different scriptures for all of that, the hair, makeup, dresses.. (as for dresses i remember a scripture says women should wear something thats "long and flowing", and usually Pants aren't long and flowing? right? lol.. but
no we don't believe that its required to be saved, just that you repent, be baptized in Jesus Name, and recieve the Holy Ghost.
I have been reading all the posts here and can't help but reply.
First off, I am an Apostolic Pentecostal believer since I was 11. And yes, I am an all-dresses and skirts woman, never put on make-up and jewelry NOT because pastor so and so tells me to do it or not to do it or because it's the church standards or rules to follow BUT because it's a personal conviction and I have chose to live that way for God. As for biblical support, I can provide you with scriptures and even historical studies (I have made researches about this myself) and you can argue each point.
But one thing is clear throughout the Scripture, the Bible does speak of MODESTY. The question then would be, What does the Bible say on being MODEST?
The word modest literally means orderly, well-arranged, decent as it is used in 2 Timothy 2:7 and 1 Peter 3:3 - an ordering of whole life.
Webster defines it as lacking in vanity, not bold, not self-asserting, moderate, observing conventional standards of dress and manner. ." The word modesty means freedom from coarseness and indelicacy, a regard for propriety in dress, speech, and conduct. Sobriety means soundness of mind, sound judgment.
"In 1 Samuel 16:7 we read, �Man looks on the outward appearance.� The Lord was not condemning man for looking on the outward appearance but was drawing our attention to it so we would know it is an important factor. Appearances do count.
Simplicity is always in style. Because we do not wear make-up and clothing that. It is true that there are many more scriptures concerning correct inner attitudes than there are for outward appearance. But even the inward works its way outward. Our appearance should not draw attention to the flesh in a suggestive manner but on the other hand it should not draw attention because of lack of neatness or because of slothfulness.
Neatness and appearance do not require adornment. Jewelry is intended to adorn and attract attention. It tends to encourage pride, which, in case you have forgotten, is sinful. The inward adorning of a meek and quiet spirit should be our desire. In the life of a true Christian, outward adorning is always in harmony with the Word of God.
The source of modesty comes from the person�s heart. Modesty is the outward manifestation of an inward purity. No activity justifies the wearing of immodest apparel that exposes the body in such a way as to cause immoral lust or desire in someone else. It is sad when the Biblical standard for modest dress is ignored and the world�s customs are passively adopted. The church, and more specifically the ministry, should act and dress differently from a corrupt society that casts aside and even ridicules God�s desire for modesty and purity.
Romans 12:1-2 says it well. �I beseech you therefore brethren by the mercies of God that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world but be ye transformed by the renewing of your minds that ye may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.� Our greatest desire and prayer should be to possess a single-minded passion to please God in holiness and to offer the members of our bodies to His service. We must stand against the popular prevailing forms of the spirit of this world and refuse to yield to the various types of worldliness that constantly surround the church. If you must defend or explain the way you dress then your heart and your dress is wrong.
We must dress as becometh holiness; we must act as becometh holiness (Titus 2:3)." (as quoted from Gwyn Oakes, The Front Row)
Apostolic-Guy I can provide you a copy of biblical, historical and even scientific discussions on this issue (if you want).
Well, Apostolic, from the answers you got from women arguing about your denomination's standards, I think you have your answer. If your church or denomination's teachings are important to you, stay within that denomination. Otherwise you are going to be argued with.
Man, I didn't realize women were UGLY without makeup. That's a really sad view, JesusLoves.
Well, two add my two cents worth to this conversation.....
You and the love o' your life do need to have similar beliefs and convictions. That may mean you date within your denomination, or date outside and she converts, date outside and you convert to her denomination, or the two of you find a denomination you both believe in and both of you convert.
Are you willing to change your beliefs? That should take care of some of those choices. If not, you are pretty well limited to within your denomination or converting the lady.
A word of caution, some ladies have beliefs and convictions as strong as gentlemen. Assuming a lady will renounce what she believes and the relationship she has with God and the church for you is a dangerous gamble and a very difficult position in which to place a lady. Before going there, you might consider how you would feel if you were given an ultimatum of choosing your church or the love of your life.
Siylii, I dun put any make up at the moment, but I was referring to the wedding day when flashes of camera here and there. I have been told by photographers that women should at least put a lil make up when they are captured by the camera so they wouldn't look so pale. Some men (like models) have their make up as well for the sake of "look good on pics".
I was in the Apostolic Pentecostal Church for most of 2009 and i was doctrinated this is very legalistic and witchcraft legalism is spiritual witchcraft bondage. IF your really believe in your apostolic pentecostal doctrine then just date those ppl who believe it because how can 2 walk together if they are agreed. Just to clarify with everyone Apostolic Pentecostals believe to be saved you have to repent of your sins, be water baptized in Jesus Name only for for washing away of your sins and you have to speak in tongues as the only evidence of receiving the holy spirit that is a different doctrine and gospel also they believe to stay saved you have to obey their denomination rules and doctrine. It sounds to me like this is Religous Bondage i was in it i got out of it by stop thinking that my Pastor was right and I started doing research studying it for myself.
So this is what we must do.
2Timothy 2:15 Be Dilligent to present yourself approved to God, a worker who does not need to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.
here is some good videos to listen to and study be open minded.
Denomination does matter in a relationship because the church one attends helps to define the core beliefs. I believe Baptists, Catholics, Evangelicals, Episcopaleans, Apostolics, etc can all be Christians; however, we do not all worship the same. I grew up in one type of Baptist church...my dad is an ordained preacher in the church...but I now attend a different type of Baptist church.
The standards you mentioned (women wearing only dresses, no jewelry, etc) are not confined to just Apostolic. I attended Baptist churches with some of the same standards. When I served in one, I adhered to its standards, even though I didn't fully agree with the Biblical reference. Because it wasn't whether I wore pants that determined my Salvation or who I was. At that particular time in my life, I was a representative of that church and made the decision to adhere to the accepted standards.
Circumstances led me to a different church of similar beliefs except pants are not forboden (and I am relieved).
You will need to reflect on what you have been taught in your church, study the Bible (all of it, not just a handful of verses that have been cited), and pray about it. There is nothing wrong with having standards for yourself and expectations for your spouse to accept those standards. I know many women who are comfortable with the standard of wearing only dresses...I'm not one of them...but I respect them for being able to uphold that standard.
As for make-up and jewelry...I personally choose not to wear either...even on my wedding day. I don't worry about looking pale in a photo...I like how God made me, freckles and all.
JesusLoves, the blanket statement you made was very non-specific and exaggerated. Maybe you should say what you mean so as to be taken more seriously. Besides, I know of brides who did not wear makeup on their wedding day, and I think it speaks hugely of their confidence and priorities. Also, there are plenty of men who dislike makeup.
