Author	Thread: Best Thing You Can Do
Admin	Best Thing You Can Do Posted : 17 Sep, 2013 05:14 PM Sharing an idea I had today, which is that the best thing you can do to improve your dating and relationships is to become good at instilling value in others and making people feel like they matter. What do you guys and gals think? Post Reply
teach_ib View Profile History	Best Thing You Can Do Posted : 17 Sep, 2013 07:59 PM That is definitely a trait to work on, develop. We should all work to build others up, be an encouragement, highlight the better qualities. Post Reply
Lukia^ View Profile History	Best Thing You Can Do Posted : 18 Sep, 2013 02:04 AM Yes I agree with you Renov We should be encouraging others and making them feel important,then they will have a reason to live. This also helps people to build their faith. This a good thought. Post Reply
Lukia^ View Profile History	Best Thing You Can Do Posted : 18 Sep, 2013 02:06 AM Yes I agree with you Renov. We should be encouraging others and making them feel important. This helps in giving one a reason to live. It also helps one to build faith. This is a good thought. Post Reply
View Profile History	Best Thing You Can Do Posted : 18 Sep, 2013 09:21 PM It's funny, I am realizing how quickly it is for this goal to become difficult and a challenge most of the time as I go about my. Like when in traffic, or having a rude customer, or running into some one who rejected you. But, I think it's good because it forces me to not rely so much on being influenced by external things but rather me influencing things externally for the better. And, at least I have this in my mind now to focus on getting to. I think this might be my new pact with myself: To find a way every day to make some one feel worth and value and like they matter. I like it.. I like it a lot. :dancingp: Post Reply
anyann View Profile History	Best Thing You Can Do Posted : 19 Sep, 2013 12:03 AM a good post! :) Post Reply
Hisjoymypeace View Profile History	Best Thing You Can Do Posted : 3 Oct, 2013 10:40 PM Excellent post indeed R8E8......... Post Reply
View Profile History	Best Thing You Can Do Posted : 4 Oct, 2013 12:38 PM I actually want to amend this to say the best thing you can give people is what they need. One of my professors was saying the other day how when her teenage daughter is throwing a tantrum or going crazy, she just cuts to the chase mid-rant and says "What do you need/want?" and usually it's just like a hug or something. I found it interesting to think over. So on that note, I think women on online dating would find guys trying to instill value boring and not be all that responsive to it because they don't need it because they already get plenty of it on here. Rather what they need is excitement and action because they don't have much of that. Maybe? I could be wrong though. Thoughts? Post Reply
sisygirl View Profile History	Best Thing You Can Do Posted : 4 Oct, 2013 02:12 PM Could really be wrong hey I'm open for correction if one might see a need of correcting me. Relationships are very much dependent on acceptance. This is the most crucial part since it can either make or break the relationship, let alone denying it, its existance before it even begins. This could really be sounding pretty law coming from me, considering i'm the most rejected person ever. But that was what i've learned through my experiences of rejection. NB... (now I don't want you to take this bad or personal like Goodmorning did on the other forum please, I trust your understanding dear) With relationships' dear friend, the pursued part (unfortunately) always have the upper hand until he/she decides otherwise. Christ Jesus is the most perfect example of this since He's always chasing after souls. Until both parties come to an agreement of some kind, He's greatness and supreme has no effect in you, even if He forces Himself on you (which i'm glad he doesn't) that will still serve no purpose cause He's dependent on your faith in Him as the first step of acceptance. Maybe God would have said, NB (I by no means... Mean to change He's word, its only an example) Maybe He should have said "It is impossible to please God without acceptance of He's word in your heart" How will you coperate without believe? You'd be resistance and doubtful ofcause. But since He's the Lord of order, He waits for you to believe (as first sign of acceptance) for Him to shine in you especially since its a two way traffic, both parties have responsibilities to fulfill. Now if God still waits for acceptance from you... What does that say about us human beings? Until you with an upper hand in the matter let Him in, there's no relationship between the two. It still goes back to how you sell yourself to the lady. It has nothing much to do with your profile honestly, but more of how you present yourself to her. This fellow guy from onother site that I told you about (that he made a mark when asking about skin problems) would have won me over if only he played he's card right... Think he chickened out for some reasons. I was a little intimated (in a charmed manner though) of he's energy cause he came with an attitude of having this conversation with me without giving much choice. I was thinking hard of altinatives to avoiding the conversation (would have got easly attached) it was a loosing battle, had to give in cause I just knew the following massages he was gonna sent me. Was just not up for those. Did I check he's profile? Nope. It was all in how he came across... Was very interesting. Might have deviated from what you've asked, Hope this gives a little sense. How do you market yourself versus what she needs. Post Reply
teach_ib View Profile History	Best Thing You Can Do Posted : 4 Oct, 2013 04:12 PM I casual contact, being considerate, helpful, kind is important because you can make a difference without realizing it. Others are watching...if not at that moment hey will be later. Getting in the habit of smiling at people who serve you and saying thanks, have a good day pays off over and over again. I've commented to cashiers on how well they handled a rude or trying customer...been on that side of the cash register...it takes their mind off the bad and helps them refocus. And if it's a place you frequent, they will remember you in the future. I also find it helpful if you make someone wait, customer service type jobs or doctor's office for example, that you tell them you're running behind and check on them often. Everyone understands delays but they are more bearable if you know you're not being ignored. If the person is a family member, friend or coworker, it is definitely better to ask them what they need/want or how they feel. I remember my sister calling to tell me something, jumped right into the conversation without a hey how are you doing...and at the end of her monologue she said I thought you needed some good news...and what I needed from her was to listen to how I felt about an incidence between us...much more to the story but an example of how someone assumed what I needed and ends up making a bad situation worse. I think labeling people's feelings is often irritating too...saying you're angry so i'm going to leave you alone can cause a bad reaction...better to say 'are you upset, was it something I did or didn't do' 'how can I help or make it up to you' A smile and a thank you goes a long way! Post Reply
sisygirl View Profile History	Best Thing You Can Do Posted : 4 Oct, 2013 08:39 PM Wow Teach!! I'm always learning something new from you Thanks!! Post Reply