Lydia, you have no idea how much I agree with this. I get the strangest looks when I tell people that I think women's liberation messed up this country more than anything else. Look at where we've gone since then - relationships mean nothing, kids are raised by a TV set, the crime rate has skyrocketed, the list goes on and on.
I know it's not easy to submit to someone - God gave me a strong will because He knew where I was headed in my own disobedience and knew I'd need it. However, as He is changing me, I can feel that I'm letting that need to be in control go. Not because there is a significant other in my life, but because He has shown me HE is in control of my life. I no longer need that "self defense" mechanism, because I have submitted first to Him. I now know that when He does place the person He has for me in my life, that it's okay to submit to him, also. It all boils down to trust, and we first have to trust God to be able to trust our mate.
Human's love to mess with perfection, don't we? We think that we have a better way. Someone wrote in their profile: "If you want to make God laugh, tell Him your plans." So true.
Thanks for your reply. I too am a strong willed woman and was very independent before Christ. A feminist even! But neither one work very well in a marriage relationship. God has really changed my heart and mind in this area and when I do get married I will submit, I will put my husbands needs above my own, and he will be second only to God.
I know that it will not always be easy given my assertive personality, but I trust God that I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. I will begin every day on my knees asking God to help me to be selfless and to be an excellent wife.
The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.
As christian women we are supossed to submit to the will of our husbands as unto the Lord, that is why I said in my profile that I was a strongwilled woman who needed a strong man, I have dated men who were willing to let the woman make all the major decisions and it just doesn't feel right in my spirit!
Thanks for your answer. I find it difficult to respect a man who will allow me to make the decisions. I too am a strong willed woman and require a strong leader, but not a tyrant. It is my desire to have a biblically correct marriage.
My question to you is this. As a man am I supposed to dictate things because I was raised as a gentleman. the person is suppsed to grab the door and the man to bring the lady to dinner. So is it a bad thing if I let her choose?
NO it not a bad thing to let her choose. A man should be the head of his home and lead by example and with love. We were talking about submitting to a man as the head of the household, not as a tyrant who has to have his way on everything. You keep on letting her choose. :applause:
Eph 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
Yes, but marriage has evolved over the centuries, since Ephesus even the past few years. Relationships must continue to grow, and that takes work, from both partners. I know plenty who see the marriage as a joint partnership and are still together, and some that don't. To some cultures the wedding ring meant that the woman had been purchased and had the church's blessing. Many men wear rings now too! Thank God that women are no longer seen as property! No one, male nor female should be seen as an object.
"There is neither Jew nor Greek,There is neither slave nor free,
There is neither male nor female; For you are all one in Christ Jesus. Gal 3:28" (woohoo eisegesis at work)
I will be a kind and gentle Dad to my two daughters, and that is MY choice. I think that the macho stereotype has put too much pressure on men. I don't see myself as weak, it takes strength to be gentle, especially in the face of peer pressure to do otherwise. But I will also protect them and teach them to stand up for themselves too. I also can see plenty of times where the man being the leader of the house has caused problems (no not always). The wife suddenly starts to think on her own, and he gets scared of losing her...and presses more and more for her to change back. First presuasion, then yelling, and it can lead to more severe forms of abuse. Should we blame her for causing it? No. Culture itself has allowed these sorts of negative stereotypes to persist. If she *wants* to be a housewife and mom and not work outside the home, and he is supportive of it, great! If she decides she doesn't want to do that any more, he needs to step up to the plate and be supportive too! That's what working together is all about, yes? I can't see anything better than growing together in God. I have seen too many men marry a woman and she stays home, forgoing an education or work for the sake of the family, and then she gets older and he divorces her, leaving her high and dry for a younger more physically attactive woman. Now she is left alone, with no skills, and often times children to raise on her own. She is the one with the strength, but at what cost? It's not fair.
IF you women here choose that lifestyle (or something similar) and are supported for it, I applaud you, being a mom is like 2 full time jobs!...but if God leads you down a different path, that's your choice too. Never let a man or anyone else TELL you what to do with your life, that is between you and the Lord. Period.
Remember God does what God wants with us, whether we like it or not :):glow:
Marriage is 25/25/50 (half and half and GOD) :winksmile:
But what do I know? one of my chromosomes has a piece broken off, rats *Sigh* :winksmile:
Hmmm, this issue is so complex and I usually don't like to talk about it, because I am looked down upon and judged for my views. I must at all times be true to myself...to the person God created me to be...therefore, I cannot allow a man/husband to make my decisons whether he does in a loving way or an abusive way....I am accountable for myself, he is not. I am the one who will stand before God, my Messiah, and be judged for my action and lack of action in this life. BTW ladies, Paul also said in his letters to the churches that we should not braid our hair or wear jewelry....nor should we speak in the church and actually it's best just to stay single and never have sex.....hmmm but if none of us from his time to now ever had sex....most of us would not be here, interesting. Maybe, just maybe, some of what this man was talking about was cultural...applying only to his day and time.
I abhor the way women have been treated, viewed, and brainwashed throughout our existence. If being married means I must submit to a man, that he must always have the last word....then I will stay single. I am happy with being the bride of Christ....I need not be anyone else's bride if I can not be true to myself.
God has put men at the head of the house thats spiritually.when we fail to be the spititual leaders the foundation will crumble my point is that maybe you havent had a man tha is willing not only to protect his salvation but the salation of his family.its a big responsibility to be the head of the house we as men are accontable to god for all of our actions and the spiritual growth of our family,but i feal that in a strong christian family the man should confined with his wife on all levels.God has put us as the spiritual leaders but by no means has he taken any athority from women and men should not abuse that scripture.i dont know if that made any sense ,but things in general should be 50 50.sorry im dislexic so my spelling is horrific.it was nice texing you and thank you i havent recieved a nice compliment in a long time,
Submission in its proper biblical context is a beautiful, grand thing. When we submit our thoughts to the obedience of Christ, things change. When we submit to God instead of the flesh, things change.
Not once in my KJV is a woman ever commanded to love her husband, but merely respect his position as spiritual leader. On the other hand, a man is commanded to love his wife insomuch as to give up his life to protect her. This means simply that at the end of any given day, man being built to be a leader by example(he guards her heart and body, she guards his mind/ego) that when the couple sits down together and makes a list of all the things their spouse has done for them - it should exceed her husbands list. Meaning he is to be the greater servant of the two, or a washer of anothers feet.
Mutual submission is a beautiful thing with love. Wives from personal understanding are not to submit if anything is unbiblical such as robbing a bank, or trying to smuggle some foreign animals into the country. Anything that God is strictly opposed to she should not submit to. If there are problems then...prayer circle!!! A woman isn't meant to be a slave or item, but rather the completion of another designed work of art(sacred covenant) God put here as a test for His glory.
These days the adversary attacks at the base level where our children will learn love - the home and family. Nothing should pry apart what God has bound together, and if a man and woman are not serious about Jesus daily, everyday, weekly... keeping in the word and guarding each other.. good chance of it being a sharp rough road.
One pastor I listen to put it this way: consider the relationship with your wife like a bank account. If you never make any deposit/investments there won't ever be anything to withdraw. If you do all the dishes yourself for a few weeks or any chore she dislikes, always help with any chores, even the one you may abhor doing... it builds up and you're investing in your wife. When you're investing in your wife and pampering her, she grows richer and you'll be happy when you want to make a withdrawal(withdrawing what is up to you.)
Anyway.. tough subject and an ugly word for a lot of people who do not understand submission it its proper biblical context. Both have to really focus on Jesus and be equally yoked.
