Truth is I waited too long. I began dating at age 30, and now at 36, almost 37, I am getting a bit impatient. I have had only one relationship in my life, which started out really nice but ended because we had different beliefs. She was Baptist, and I am Charismatic. She criticized and made fun of my favorite preachers and people I look up to, and I felt very bad about that. So, I broke up with her.
It is so hard to find the RIGHT person. I am looking for someone slightly younger, slightly shorter, never married, in the USA, someone who loves President Trump, and is a spirit filled believer. I would like to marry someone that I am not afraid to marry. That means someone who is not irresponsible or rude or gossiping or doesn't know how to behave or has no control over her tongue.
And everytime I list my requirements, women tell me that I shouldn't be looking for the PERFECT WOMAN, because she doesn't exist. No one is perfect. I don't think that I demand perfection, because I could say things like "I want someone who has a house and a successful business and a masters degree and speaks 3 languages and has blond hair and blue eyes and has rich parents." And honestly, I require none of that. So, I don't feel like I am looking for the perfect person. I feel like I am just looking for an average person who is like me.
I have sent maybe about 100 messages to women in the past 5 years. Most of my messages were never read. A couple of them replied saying that we're probably not a match. And a tiny few started a conversation with me, but I quickly realized that they were not what I was looking for, not even close! So, I am a bit discouraged.
I have thought about making a challenge. And I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW YOUR OPINION OR REACTION TO THIS: (I am not shouting. I am using uppercase to draw your attention to the most important sentence in this message.) What would you think if I offered to give 10,000 US dollars to anyone who finds my future wife and sets up a date for us. Rule #1: You don't have to do anything just introduce us to each other. That's all. Rule #2: You only get paid one year after our wedding. I am pretty good at seeing through people and telling what their true intentions are, so I am not scared that someone is going to scam me or trick. So far I have always been able to tell when someone was fake, and I am very good at reading people. I listen to my gut. And even if I was wrong, I will pray to God and will not marry anyone if HE says "No." So, I feel safe. He guides my steps and He talks to me.
But I want to know what would people think. WHAT DO YOU THINK when you hear that I would make such an offer? Ten thousand dollars is approximately 1/7th of my net worth. So, I am not giving up everything, but it is a considerable amount. And you don't hear people do something like this everyday.
The reason I am thinking about doing this is because I consider what will happen to me when I am old. Let's say I am retired. I have all the wealth I wanted. I have everything except a wife. I have no children. No parents, because let's face it...our parents die eventually. And people usually outlive their parents. So, there will come a day when I am sitting in my living room all alone. I'll be rich and lonely. I don't want that! At that point, it is too late to get married. I want to do it now, while I can. So, I am willing to give up a lot. But I am not sure if this may make me sound too desperate to the point where instead of making it easier to find someone, it actually makes people think I am weird and suspicious. Why would someone give 10,000 dollars to find a wife? Does it sound weird to you or sweet or pathetic or what? I don't know. Tell me what you think.
The only reason I thought of this idea was so I could find the RIGHT person for me. I didn't have in mind to impress ANYBODY. I am not trying to impress the women that I might meet as a result. I hope you understand that.
This is kind of like paying for termite inspection for your home. If you don't call the inspector, you will never find out if there are termites hiding in your attic. The only way to be sure is to call the inspector. The inspector is going to crawl under the house. He's going to look into the attic. He is going to check everything out, and if there are termites, he will let you know. Why? Because he is getting paid for it. He is not going to go to random houses and do inspections for free. Nothing in life is free. So, I thought, the only way I am going to meet the right person is if I create an incentive for people to bring women to me. I don't have time or energy or ability to meet every women in the world. I am going to create a website. All they have to do is fill out a questionnaire. If they qualify, I'll contact them. So simple. :)
Ok so you're viewing it like paying for a matchmaking service, when I originally read your post I didn't get that notion, in fact it bought something completely different to mind...
I think this is a pretty good reply...it's interesting that a tenth is being offered an it made me wonder what would happen if a tenth was given to the Lord somehow then what would happen? I don't know but all I could think when I read about the �10k was, "Fast & pray brother."
"It's not by might, nor by power but by my spirit," saith the Lord.
I've been on my own nearly 8 years, for various reasons; I lived in an isolated place, home-schooled 5 kids and have been through a lot. God's timing is not our timing and recently I asked my Dad to pray about it for me and we both knew that God was saying," It's not the right time."
It's a hard thing to accept, but we must trust God, afterall He is all-knowing, and as I progress in my walk, I am realising more stuff that He wants me to work through before I am ready for a relationship. Patience, endurance, long-suffering are hard things but His grace IS enough and I continually look to Him and He sustains me. We know that all things work together for good to those who love God and are called according to His purposes. My life is not my own it was bought with the precious blood of Christ. Godliness with contentment is great gain, and although I'm not cut out to remain single indefinitely, I tell Him when I'm hurting or lonely or whatever and He is faithful and does answer me.
I hope this is a help dear brother. He is a rewarder of those that diligently seek Him.
I have already relaxed my criteria. I am not willing to relax it any further especially if I am offering up such a lot of money. I am not a rich person. I do not have money sitting around in my bank account. I will have to sell part of my business to make good on this offer. I will have to look for another job possibly to survive. I don't know what will happen. For me, it is a huge sacrifice. It's not like I have 10,000 dollars to spend, and it's burning a hole in my pocket.
And yes, I have been praying and fasting, and this idea came to me while I was doing that.
You have been single for five years and have several children. Okay. But everyone's story and situation is different. I have been single for 36 years. I have no children. Once you have children, you see the world a bit differently. You feel like you have accomplished your mission (to a degree), and your job is to make sure your kids turn out all right. Of course, it's nice to have a soulmate and helper, but the process of dating introduces unnecessary drama into your life, which is really not good for your kids. What you need right now is probably stability and safety. But I think, I can handle a bit of excitement and drama. I don't have kids to take care of.
I'll be honest - I have thought about something similar (way less money and just finding me a fishing partner). But regarding your proposal - well I don't think you will get many takers because they would put in a lot of effort with no guarantee of any return. You also have the fact that all the money in the world cannot MAKE the right person appear in your life (which is why I don't expect much from this website any longer - if it is not God's will, it's not His will and no amount of searching will change that - or in your case, no amount of money will change that). I am not saying it can't ever work or that God cannot ever use something like money or website - just saying probably not to put too much stock into it.
