Christian Chat Forums | Friendship First or Friendship Only - CDFF

Author	Thread: Friendship First or Friendship Only
JamesEG View Profile History	Friendship First or Friendship Only Posted : 3 Sep, 2019 11:37 AM Why are so many females interested in rushing into marriage or a romantic relationship? What about beginning a relationship with a casual friendship gradually getting to know one another better? Persons may even choose to remain single and celibate. In the New Testament Jesus (see Matthew 19:8-12) and the Apostle Paul (see I Corinthians 7) both stated that it's better to remain single. Even today it is possible to enjoy platonic male and female friendships without the romance. People can enjoy doing things together and help one another without romance. What do you think? Post Reply
Princess1957 View Profile History	Friendship First or Friendship Only Posted : 3 Sep, 2019 03:47 PM nothing wrong with friendship always good to have friends Post Reply
JamesEG View Profile History	Friendship First or Friendship Only Posted : 3 Sep, 2019 04:54 PM Princess1957, I agree. Post Reply
Chioniso View Profile History	Friendship First or Friendship Only Posted : 4 Sep, 2019 07:10 AM Brother JamesEG, what you are saying in your first part is very correct. We should establish friendship, familiarising and knowing each other better before getting into a relationship. To tell the truth in as far as I am concerned, I cannot imagine not having sex for the rest of my life. Its so health and fun to be in love especially with the right person. I want it but I cannot do it out of wedlock. The other thing is most of the men i have met so far, on trying to maintain friendship or relationship, they want sex and as a result I end up terminating the whole thing. God have mercy. Post Reply
JamesEG View Profile History	Friendship First or Friendship Only Posted : 4 Sep, 2019 12:10 PM Chioniso, thanks for sharing your perspective. It's great that you avoid out of wedlock sex and avoid getting into serious relationships with guys who are interested in that. Though sex is one benefit of marriage, even married couples can demonstrate their love in other ways. Sadly, many of those who tell me how much they enjoy sex seem to live lives of depression, unhappy most of the time they are not having sex. It is better to be monogamously married than lustful though. I pray for God's perfect will for you in your search for that one special person. Post Reply
Ocean17 View Profile History	Friendship First or Friendship Only Posted : 5 Sep, 2019 08:27 PM Some years ago, I was in acting classes and working in the business. One night after class, a fellow student and I decided not to follow the crowd and go out on our own. We decided to go near my house and after our Cheers, I suggested we be just friends, because at that time, I could use a friend more than another relationship. He agreed, as he was in the process of getting divorced. Steve became the best guy friend I ever had. Although I believe if I had been interested, who knows, but he respected me and my wishes in every way. Long after we stopped classes, he would call every Thursday night during the Winter months to catch up. We would meet once or twice a month and talk about everything, except sex, which was a set rule from the start. He believed in God but was struggling with life and his faith. He adored his twin girl and boy. On one of our last meetings, I told him that I knew one of us would meet someone soon, so I wanted to let him know that I loved him and will always fondly remember his friendship over 5 years. Shortly after this, he met his now wife. They've been married for about 20 years. I've never met her. We send each other happy birthday messages. I could ask him anything and he me. But I am happy he is happy. He and his wife sing and play drums (he) for their church. I prefer meeting the man God has planned for me, in the meantime, I miss having a guy friend. God is good!!! Post Reply

Chioniso View Profile History	Friendship First or Friendship Only Posted : 6 Sep, 2019 03:39 AM James i agree with you except this statement "It is better to be monogamously married than lustful though". This is not bible quote. Here you are trying to justify yourself. Lustful is sin. According to 1 Corinthians 10 verse 13 God made way for me to escape. If I say I like sex, I like it only when i am married. Anyway my God is above all. But that does not stop me from telling him that I want a husband to have sex with, a husband that supports my christian values and respects me. Besides all let it be unto His will. Because God knows whats best for me. Proverbs 3 verse 5 tells us not to lean on our own understanding, and according to your statement you are justifying yourself. Neither monogamy nor lust is recommended in the bible. But God has created a way for each one of us to escape every temptation. Post Reply
Chioniso View Profile History	Friendship First or Friendship Only Posted : 6 Sep, 2019 03:59 AM Ocean, my question remains, yes you became best friends, does that mean you had no feelings (to be in love) for each other? I thought if you become best friends, you are close and eventually through prayers God will move you to next level. Post Reply
JamesEG View Profile History	Friendship First or Friendship Only Posted : 6 Sep, 2019 09:55 AM Ocean17, thanks for sharing that story! It's wonderful that you developed that close platonic friendship. Post Reply
JamesEG View Profile History	Friendship First or Friendship Only Posted : 6 Sep, 2019 10:10 AM Chioniso, thanks for the Bible references and for your desire to submit to God's will. I certainly agree with you that sexual lust is wrong. I'm sorry if my comment indicated anything otherwise. And, while my statement about being monogamously married being better than being in lust was not a Bible quote, it was a paraphrase of part of two Bible verses that I cite below. In I Corinthians 7:9 the Apostle Paul states ". . . it is better to marry than to burn with passion" as the New International Version puts it. And I Corinthians 7:2 in the King James Version states "Nevertheless to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband." This is monogamy. Post Reply
View Profile History	Friendship First or Friendship Only Posted : 6 Sep, 2019 12:28 PM I find that many men want to skip the friendship part, something that I find very important. They don't want to go through the process of getting to know you better and build a friendship. What I have observed with most men is that their conversations are centered around love. Remove love from the conversation or bring up another topic for discussion, he will suddenly go quiet. Post Reply