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Author Thread: Honor Thy Father and Thy Mother
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Honor Thy Father and Thy Mother
Posted : 6 Apr, 2008 06:05 AM

I don't know where this belongs so hopefully it will fit here.lol



As our parents get older, (well, we do as well) and we struggle with the decision in placing them in a home or caring for them ourselves, we find it difficult to address the issue. We certainly don't want them to think we're dumping them off or we don't want them to feel like we have no time for them. As their bodies have aged & mobility is limited, memories seem to play like a video in their aging brains.



I have found it very honorable to pay tribute to them while still in our presence, with a memorial. Not a monument but a hand written memorial declaring some of our fondest memories when spent with them at younger ages. This could include a fun time at an amusement park, a car ride where just the 2 of you had a great conversation, or anything of a loving memory. Write these down, thank them for what they have done for you and please leave out all negatives for we are to forgive them anyway. Place it on some decorative paper, maybe even frame it and then present it to them on a non- special occasion, but read it to them first. YOUR words will fill their hearts and reviewing memories will put a gleam back into their eyes...Remember we are commanded to Honor Thy Father and Thy Mother. GOD bless all of you.

T:goofball:mie

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PeachPuff

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Honor Thy Father and Thy Mother
Posted : 6 Apr, 2008 01:02 PM

You are so right Tomie. We have to respect our parents. But it is sometimes very difficult to have to deal with our parents as they get older. My folks are 85 and 90 and stubborn. As they get older, they are getting more stubborn, more prejudiced, and just mean in their attitude. It's sad to see that.



How does one deal with an elderly parent that doesn't want to get help? My mother is hard of hearing to the point that it is affecting others. She is PETRIFIED of going to a doctor because she is SCARED that they might find something. My mother hides the fact that she is losing weight. There is something definitely wrong with her but she will act like nothing is going on. She wears 2 or 3 layers of clothing to make herself look fatter. She is 5 foot tall,maybe shorter and most likely weighs 90 lbs or less. I know that sometimes older people wither away to nothing...but I am concerned with her. How would you handle the hearing situation and also the fact that she is losing weight?



Thanks.

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Honor Thy Father and Thy Mother
Posted : 6 Apr, 2008 01:40 PM

Thanks for replying 'PeachPuff'. Sometimes I think I'm the only that comes to the forums.:laugh:



I'm sorry you're in such a difficult situation. But I can see that you love your parents and that you're doing your best to care for them. I they, undoubtedly don't see it that way.

It seems at their age they are reversing back to childhood; in being rebellious and adament. So, you'll have to play 'role reversal' with them. You'll have to be the parent and they'll have to be the child. Please do this in a loving caring manner as to not offend or cause bitterness and tell them you are showing your love for them by forcing them to see a professional medical doctor. It's a show of force but not in the physical realm but in the arena of boundaries. I'm sure you can recall being sent to the doctor when you weren't feeling well and really not wanting to go when you were a child. It's time for payback:laugh: Just a little humor here.

Set up the appointment either for one or both, whichever you can handle, then load them up in the car and drive them there. On the way there, tell them where you are taking them in a loving caring tone. Hopefully the fight will run out of them by the time you get there...more humor. Do your best not to get tensions high cause this will cause their blood pressure to rise and add to their alread burdensome medical problems. Once you are there, ask one of the assistants there to help you with getting them out & into the office. Most assistants have skills in dealing with the elderly in this way. It's not going to be easy but there is hope and you're doing it for them and because you love them. I will keep your trial in prayer. GOD bless you & your parents.

T:goofball:mie

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hedgedweller

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Honor Thy Father and Thy Mother
Posted : 5 Jun, 2008 05:09 AM

I think we should just ship our old perents to Iraq and let the easterners deal with them ,, Better yet, send them to japan and let them try to out live the older asians.



Oh,,, wait a minute,,,, Im a parent and gettin older now,,, so lets change these rules,,,, ok a little humor,, :ROFL:

:ROFL::ROFL::ROFL::ROFL::ROFL::ROFL::ROFL::ROFL:



First we need to get rid of all this medicine and surgeries to keep us alive past our mind. For me,,,, I think I am only going to leave my assets to the child of mind who makes sure I dont live past my mind. That way I wont have to deal with someone misstreating me in a nursing home.



Ok real serious this time,,,,,,,,:rocknroll::rocknroll::rocknroll:

:rocknroll::rocknroll::rocknroll::rocknroll::rocknroll::rocknroll::rocknroll::rocknroll::rocknroll::rocknroll::rocknroll::rocknroll:

I pray to My heavenly father that he takes me beofre my mind goes. AND if not I might inlist in the next world war or search for Osama Ben Laden.

Or is that Obama Husien Barraka Ben Laden,,, I dont know any more, I get these names all messed up,,,,,,,, see My mind is already going,,,, someone push me off a cliff before I get myself into a nursing home.



,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, Hedgedweller,,,,,,,,,,,, :peace: o u t !!!

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SJC1985

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Honor Thy Father and Thy Mother
Posted : 13 Jun, 2008 12:26 PM

:ROFL:

I loved your humor in this one! I'm still searching for the one that you wanted me to look for on God's audible voice.



SJC1985



P.S.: Sandy and I finally made it to Connecticut, and we have checked in to this fancy motel she chose. I was happy that it has computers with internet for guests!



I called yesterday, while Sandy was driving, and made a reservation for a Rodeway Inn in PA, mainly because of the price!(I picked up one of the coupon books at the PA Welcome Center!)

Needless to say, we were happy to get some rest and get out of the "get what you pay for" motel! I've learned a lesson to never reserve a room without seeing it first, especiallly if it is cheap!

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Deborahe

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Honor Thy Father and Thy Mother
Posted : 13 Jun, 2008 03:52 PM

Honor Thy Father and Thy Mother is the only commandment God gave us that ends in a promise : that our days will be long upon the earth. All too often we wait until they're already gone before we realize just how many times we could have been kinder,gentler;more respectful. The guilt that often accompanies all the " wish I would haves" can be almost unbearable:::so please honor them now. You'll be glad You did and more importantly; our FATHER commands it!!

Deborah :angel:















P.S. ,SJC1985- - - We're all glad to hear you and Sandy are having a nice trip :ROFL: God Bless ~~~~

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joyfulmusic

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Honor Thy Father and Thy Mother
Posted : 27 Jul, 2008 08:56 AM

That's a wonderful idea. However I may try and type up a book for them as a gift instead. I have too many things I can think of to only do one! lol Of course I am my parent's caregiver so I live with them. I don't put it the other way round because it is their house.



I don't know why so many people aren't willing to take care of their parents. Of course mine were wonderful as a grew up so maybe that's why it's such an easy thing to do. I can only hope whoever I end up marrying agrees.

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