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Author Thread: What part of...N...O...don't you understand?!
DontHitThatMark

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What part of...N...O...don't you understand?!
Posted : 4 Aug, 2009 09:09 AM

Alright ladies, say a guy that's been hanging around you a little, comes up to you and says, "Would you like to go out". If you're NOT interested, and you say, "no"...how many of you would want him to ask you again? And how many times would it take before it gets "obnoxious"...or even "obsessed"?



:peace::peace:

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What part of...N...O...don't you understand?!
Posted : 4 Aug, 2009 09:58 AM

I would say it depends on how you asked and her reasons for saying no. It is ok to ask more than once, but give it space inbetween asking.



Personally I would say ask up to 3 times, if she still says no.. then don't waste your time asking again. (3 strikes your out rule)



Sometimes persistance pays off. I know I have told someone no, but then when he asked again there was something different in my mood or the way he asked... I said yes. (then remember why I said no the first time) lol but that is beside the point.



~Lisa

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What part of...N...O...don't you understand?!
Posted : 4 Aug, 2009 02:06 PM

if straight no, then don't ask again. If there was a reason, and she leaves a crack in the door. Maybe try the group dating... kinda staging it so you have some time with her at a function. Like, hey we are all getting together for minature golf, wanna come with some friends... oh, and ya gotta have a ringer (cute guy, yes you are cute, but one for her friends, then some nice guys too)

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What part of...N...O...don't you understand?!
Posted : 4 Aug, 2009 02:11 PM

No means no BUT come on ladies we all know that very often we do not say NO we say soemthing like i cant or i dont think so right now so we give the guy hope.. if we have NO interest in him say very nicely no thank you



GBU

bethany

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ayngrady

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What part of...N...O...don't you understand?!
Posted : 4 Aug, 2009 04:26 PM

i think shy is right...if im just not ready i will say something like..hey, lets talk for a while. if im not intereated at all ill say "NO"



OK nuff said

k.ayn

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BluEyedBumbleBee

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What part of...N...O...don't you understand?!
Posted : 7 Aug, 2009 07:05 PM

I am rather blunt. I say what I mean to say. If I say "no" then I mean no and don't ask again. If I change my mind later then I will tell you and ask you out.



If a guy keeps asking me out after I have said no then I have to assume he doesn't respect the boundaries that I have placed and that he can't be friends either.



Of course when saying no I would tell him why and then when ending the friendship I would tell him why as well. Nothing is worse then leaving an issue to just fester. Better to nip it in the bud and help them not repeat it on another girl.

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woababy

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What part of...N...O...don't you understand?!
Posted : 26 Feb, 2010 10:20 PM

Many guys think when a woman says no, she means yes.

It actually means no.

A guy starts hanging around you and asks you out.

You say no. You agree just be friends, becauase you think he is cool and you like hanging out and do not want to lose a friend or hurt his feelings. However, you had a reason(s) for saying no to dating him, which is an entirely different thing, and you meant it.

After that, it is his job to respect the boundaries and accept the no. He let you know he is interested, so you watch him...If you keep getting to know each other and change your mind, you can then let him know your no is now yes. The best way to soidify that no forever is to keep asking, or to push the issue by crossing the line in any way....such as; showing up uninvited at her house, acating jealous of her time/ attention, trying to get too close physically, calling too much, asking super personal questions-basically acting boyfriendy...

Respect her wishes and adopt the mindset that you want to be her friend first...not just to get her to date you, but a true friend...prove yourself in that way. In the meantime, pray about it. If God wants it to happen, it will. ( You should not have to force it.) If God does have it in his plan, she will have a change of heart and fall in love with you.

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Love is: patient & kind, doesn't envy or boast, isn't proud, rude, self-seeking, or easily angered, keeps no record of wrongs, doesn't delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth, always protects, trusts, hopes, & perseveres.

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