Author Thread: Here is my story
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Here is my story
Posted : 24 Sep, 2009 08:48 AM

Here is my story and what brought me here.

I was married in 1991 and life was going pretty good for me, things improved for my former wife and I. We didn't get along very well and her personality changed drastically when her parents died in the early 1990's. We bought our first house in 2000 and managed to hold on to it until 2008. Things really started turning sour for us when my employer was trying to rule my life. We worked at the same place and they hired this guy who was really into Harley Davidson Motorcycles. There is nothing at all about me that has any interest in those things but all of a sudden she started getting phone calls from who I believed to be this guy from work. We worked at really odd hours 2 am at times. She would come home and there is Harley Davidson junk everywhere, everything but the bike itself. she put it on her car in her car, bought t-shirts and purses. One day she gets a phone call while we were travelling down the interstate and she gets a phone call. she answers it and tells "nobody" exactly where she is on the interstate. If it wasn't anybody then why did this nobody need to know what exit she is at?

She told me that she would go for walks by herself at these parks but the Park Rangers never saw her or the car there.

She then comes home with a $400 speeding ticket she got while it was believed that she was visiting the motorcycle guy because she was in a part of town she had no business being in. She wouldn't answer her phone when I needed her, this was common because she was hainging out with the motorcycle guy and would lie about it.

All of this had been coming to a head since 2005 and with the bank getting the house back and then moving to an apartment and loosing it, she started destroying our furniture. First it was the coffee table then a clock . she smashed some plates and damaged the walls. One night as I was trying to get some sleep, my brother calls and she just exploded. My brother heard all of the excitement on the phone and came over and pulled me from the house. I didn't do anything to my wife, but she takes a bat, and holds it to my face. I told her she had better strike me with it and not to make threats and then not carry them out. As she was doing this she told me to get out of her life and I obliged her on that.

My family felt she is a lunatic, they don't want me around her. We had no kids and nothing really to show for anything after 19 years of marriage. Well anyway after the sheriff came, I told the sheriff that I am leaving, the noise complaints will be no more.

People were upset with me that I did not have her arrested for the threatning me but I know that if I had done that she would have attempted suicide. she is that unstable. My actions to just leave probably saved both our lives. we got away from each other and need to start new lives of not being together. I had major trust issues with her, she could never do anything simply as she was told, always had to fight about every little thing. Sometims there are things that should just be done and you do them, you don't like them but they are necessary, she had to fight over it.

I was tired of it. I tolerated it for 19 years and I finally broke. I had wanted children and she deprived me of that joy. So I've been hurting really bad because of her. I have a small amount of debt now . She wasn't a Christian. she didn't want any part of that life. I stopped bringing her to church when she would start to cuss people out in the sanctuary. That happened at two different churches, neither of which I belong to anymore.

The time was finally here for me to put this relationship/farce away. It was getting nowhere and now that the Sheriff had become involved, I wanted no part of it. she left me to die twice when I had extreme fevers of over 105 and I had to go to the hospital. I had the proof of my fevers with me but she kept saying I was only "playing" and wasn't serious thought the thermometer said otherwise.

What my life was, was a tragedy. I want to put that away. 19 years is a big chunk out of my life that is now just an empty space.

I'm wanting to move on. I need a new chapter in my life and God needs to be in it. He wasn't in it to much from the get go no matter how hard I tried to help it. I'm trying to close it and start all over. A new beginning. Enough about the X.



"A time to tear down and a time to build...."



I'm great with kids. My job as a school bus driver and experience in working with kids for 21 years proves that.

I would like kids of my own one day but would be willing to be a step-dad. I would want a smart quick witted woman with a strong presence of mind who is positive and enthusiastic. I would want a woman who does woman -like things and has a keen fashion sense. I would want a woman who has her own friends and likes to make friends. Girls need to go do girl types of stuff too, I think that's important. I would want a woman who would be willing to put up with me and all of my craziness and love me for it. I'm an older guy now so I like to cut out the chase. I'm looking for a woman who is between 35-45 years old who could be compatible with me. (my compatibility color code is yellow) I want a woman who takes care of herself and is smart, sweet, loving and kindhearted. I do my best to reciprocate.

She doesn't have to be Wonder Woman, but I'd do my best to make her feel as if she was if she wanted to be with me.



But this is where I am. Would you fit the bill on that? It's a tall order. I am a Christian, have been since 1981. I am strong and very active in my church. I own my own Christian business too.

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tristan07

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Posted : 24 Sep, 2009 05:09 PM

hmmm... very similar to my story. I know how you feel. That's pretty fresh though brother, it took me about a year to be able to really function right in any kind of romantic relationship. Everyone kept telling me to wait, let god heal me from the hurt yada yada, but I didnt listen to I ended making a few foolish mistakes.



Now, a little over a year later, I have a great girl freind and am finally happy.



I know you dont wanna hear this, but I would take it real slow, learn how to be FRIENDS to women and listen to them, try to steer clear of romance for now, just learn to live again, you are very hurt and broken and I can tell from the way you word things that you need a little time.

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melbantolio

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Posted : 27 Sep, 2009 10:07 PM

I know you will find a person who will truly love you. I know your love story is too tragic but the remember always the promises of God he will never leave us nor forsake us. When feel alone and sad always read the Bible and keep on praying.

Also i been broken hearted but keep surviving and stay happy. God Bless you:angel:

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Posted : 2 Oct, 2009 12:05 PM

Before you even consider looking for anyone else, you should preach the word to her brother, allow the Holy Spirit to change her. The only reason is you can leave her is if she was unfaithful. or else if she doesnt want to live with you because of your faith.

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Posted : 3 Oct, 2009 02:00 PM

Sounds to me like God has better plans for your life that that nut. I think it's a definate plus that you didn't have kids with that woman. I think that she definatly needs prayers constantly so that God will come in and change who she is into a better more understanding person. I wish you the best with your future and in finding someone that God wants for you.

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lordsgirl

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Posted : 9 Oct, 2009 09:44 PM

this is for Jim -



His wife was unfaithful and she was an unbeliever who didn't want to be part of his faith.

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Posted : 30 Oct, 2009 05:36 PM

She was unfaithful. She ran off to be with a motorcyclist. She told all sorts of lies. I had been preaching the word to her for 19 years and she never listened. She threatened me with a weapon. I ended it that. I was tired of living lies.

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