Author	Thread: Issues on Virginity
susana21 View Profile History	Issues on Virginity Posted : 18 Jun, 2011 04:59 AM I know this is a very sensitive topic, and i am not sure if it has been brought up before ( too lazy to dig all the topics ), so forgive me, i don't intend to be offensive or anything. I just thought i'd post this question to you ladies ( guys opinions are welcome too ). So anyway, there was this guy who asked me upfront if i am a virgin? He was like a complete stranger, I did kind of blame myself for him bringing that up because of that statement i made in my profile. I thought it was weird of him to ask that upfront. He said that something like he probably won't consider being with anyone who is not a virgin ( i didn't ask him btw ). Would virginity be an issue to you? Post Reply
View Profile History	Issues on Virginity Posted : 18 Jun, 2011 05:56 AM Yes, this subject has been brought up before, but don�t let that keep you from asking again. Just a word of warning, this is a very heated topic, and you may get some very angry answers. I think that he asked a little too soon, but if this is very important to him, then it would be best that it was known sooner rather than later. To me, I think your profile is clear enough, at least until someone gets to know you better. I certainly think that purity is very important, as you have stated in your profile. Whether or not virginity is an issue depends on the person. Usually those who have saved themselves for marriage are looking for someone who has done the same. But, for those who have not saved themselves, whether because they were saved later in life, or they were overcome by temptation, for them virginity is not an issue. My advice to you is to continue saving yourself for marriage and don�t be concerned when guys ask you that question. If they don�t like your answer, then it�s a problem between them and God. Post Reply
susana21 View Profile History	Issues on Virginity Posted : 18 Jun, 2011 06:23 AM Thank you for your answer. I really wanted to see it in a guy's perspective. Post Reply
Rabbit32 View Profile History	Issues on Virginity Posted : 18 Jun, 2011 11:35 AM I think that's where the subject gets heated up; the amount condemnation I feel because of my circumstaces. What about ppl who were in a relationship, and they're mate was a nonbeliever, and their mate left. According to the bible they are allowed to remarry. What about the widow, whos spouse was taken in war, surley she is allowed to marry, would she be found unsuitable because she is not a virgin. To me it doesn't seem like a person is saving themselves for someone, but being obediant to God. So what if that person who is a virgin were judged on their disobeidence in other areas. To answer the qiestion: it depends on the person, hopefully we all will find a person full of undeserved mercy, because none of us deserve it. Post Reply
View Profile History	Issues on Virginity Posted : 18 Jun, 2011 12:35 PM You see, I told you it was controversial. For me this isn�t a moral issue, but a personal preference. It�s no different than wanting someone who is within a certain age range, or someone with a specific personality type. If you can find someone who is willing to take you for who you are, then God bless you. But, to say that it is wrong for someone who has worked hard to remain pure to look for someone who has also remained pure is a little too self-centered. It�s not as if those who are not virgins are rare people on this earth. Those of us who are virgins are the ones who will have a hard time finding someone. Post Reply
Ivory_Guitar View Profile History	Issues on Virginity Posted : 18 Jun, 2011 12:40 PM If the person hasn't been married before, then yes; it would be an issue for me. If they have been married before, it's kind of a given that they're not one; but I'd assume they lost it morally. In that case, it wouldn't be an issue for me. Post Reply
View Profile History	Issues on Virginity Posted : 18 Jun, 2011 01:07 PM So what if that person who is a virgin were judged on their disobeidence in other areas. I love that argument. As if we only decide based on one factor. �Well I was going to turn you down because you are a murderer and thief and a con artist, but since you are still a virgin I guess it�s ok.� I don�t think so� Post Reply
bcpianogal View Profile History	Issues on Virginity Posted : 18 Jun, 2011 01:09 PM I am one of those people who had (even up until recently) a very condemning attitude toward anyone who had given away his virginity. God knocked me up side the head a while back, though, and showed me that just because I'm still a virgin doesn't mean that I'm really any better than anyone else. He forgave them of their sin just as he forgives me of my own numerous sins. One sin is no worse than any other sin. However. It is my own personal preference to marry someone who has saved himself for marriage just as I have. I'd kind of like to go into the wedding night with a similar amount of experience (none!). I also think it would really bother me to know that I'm not the first girl he'd slept with. It's one of those "equally yoked" things, I think. And I've learned that "equally yoked" has to do with more than just spiritual matters. All that to say, keep yourself pure for marriage. The right guy will appreciate it, and somehow I feel sure that you won't regret it either. Keep in mind that people may try to shame you into giving up your own purity or lowering the standards that you feel God has given you as guidelines for finding a mate. Don't listen to them! Pray without ceasing, and follow God's leading in everything. Post Reply
View Profile History	Issues on Virginity Posted : 18 Jun, 2011 01:33 PM Amen BC! Post Reply
Rabbit32 View Profile History	Issues on Virginity Posted : 18 Jun, 2011 02:31 PM Thats what I am saying it's condemnation. Its not right or worng for person WANT a certain type of person, but please keep in mind we don't DESERVE a spouse AT ALL, none of us...not one, and I beliebve that's why God dosn't promise us one. We CAN become very arrogant, and base what we want off our own maerrit, but when we see ourselves apart from Christ we have no merrit. Post Reply
susana21 View Profile History	Issues on Virginity Posted : 18 Jun, 2011 07:15 PM @bcpianogal and @cobbler, thanks! I will definitely follow both of your advice. And amen to the wise words :) Finding the right person seems to a little frustrating though ( is it just me? lol ) @Rabbit32, i am sorry if you feel that some people condemns you because of your situation, but i certainly don't have anything against your circumstances and i didn't bring this question up for anyone to feel that either. Personally, i don't have any issue towards those who have not saved themselves for their future husband/wife God forgave them, so why can't I? But just like what @cobbler said, it is not a moral issue for me, but a personal preference, and also, because i know this is what God would've wanted for me to do. I don't think I am any better than anyone, or a more suitable mate to anyone. In the light of widows, there is no question about that, they are free to marry. And is a suitable mate just like everyone else. Gen 2:18 (KJV ) And the LORD God said, [It is] not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. Post Reply

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