It all goes down to ones' nature of beeing. Can't really say i'm a 'learder' though I certainly make things happen. Think my weakest point would be getting off the driving seat if & when I have to.
Suppose that's why I always ask about 'submission'
Wanna get it right, though it really is a struggle away from the working environment... Again what makes it possible with work is the responsibility of making decisions and initiating/implementing new ways of ensuring that we remain atleast were we current are.... if failing to take things higher to the next level. So in a way it still allows me to be myself, with crucial accountability to be done should the outcome not meet the expected results.
There's a fellow here who has added me on he's favorites list. He views my profile I don't know how many times a day. I wanted to initiate a conversation and maybe talk about what's on he's mind. Maybe we could have been friends I thought, he's from US so I don't see us being anything else than friends looking at the distance even if I was fishing.
The only thing that prevented me from reaching out, was this one particular pic of him. He looks so angry in that pic as if he's gonna beat someone right now. Was intimidated and wondered why would you post that if the intention is to seeking for love or even friendship?
Then I thought of unpleasent stories shared by ladies here when meeting someone inperson.
In short, I have a problem of making things happen, and therefore turn to be misunderstood. Not only with initiating friendship with the opposit sex, with anything at all that I want or seek to have.
Sisygirl, I truly understand! I know that a person's personality and character will ultimately prevail on how they present themselves to others. As I've already responded to a brother on the same question that I posted on their side, if I initiate contact with a brother here first, I will do all I can to reflect my interest first and foremost as a child of God......that their profile inspired me to reach out first based on that same truth!
And my sister, as for that brother whose viewed your profile numerous times, to me he sounds like he's just shy and doesn't know how to approach you(smile)lol!! Maybe you might have to bite the bullet and reach out to him first, despite his not to attractive pic.....just suggesting(smile)!! Be blessed luv!
"Maybe you might have to bite the bullet and reach out to him" Will certainly do sis. I'll read through he's profile see if there's anything I can use to start a conversation with him.
I have a little concern though looking at this young woman that I grew up to be. I often wonder how will 'me' initiating a relationship (not with this fellow from overseas, I mean a more serious relationship) is gonna impact on him if not both of us. I look at the benefits of being chased when reading in Genesis 29, where Jacob is attracted by Rachel. He worked/served 14years and it didn't seem like too many years even when betrayed, cause he was driven by love and the desire of proving to Laban that he could be entrusted with he's daughter as a wife. To top that up, he (Jacob) wasn't really bothered by he's wife being unable to conceive.
In verse 1 of chapter 30
"Now when Rachel saw that she bore Jacob no children, Rachel envied her sester, and said to Jacob, 'Give me children, or else I die' That's maximum jeloucy.
I can almost hear an agressive voice on Jacob's reply to her "2 And Jacob's anger was aroused against Rachel, and he said 'Am I in the place of God, who has withheld from you the fruits of the womb?' With jacob it really mattered not, the fight was among the ladies. Jacob was too concerned about earning so he provides for he's wives.
There is where my concern really is,
Will he provide for he's kids atleast, if he feels i'm not he's responsibility, since I initiated the who thing?
The most last thing I need is to be providing for a man, having God's protocol messed up...... While I still have to go through my portion of pain through childs' birth as God said i'll experience pain when giving life.
It was only the apostle Paul who was more general on he's statement when saying "6 But we command you, brethren, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that withdraw from any brother who walks disorderly .... 8 Nor did we eat anyone's bread free of charge, but worked with labor and toil night and day, that we might not be a burden to any of you." I think he meant both genders
While God was direct with Adam's penalty of laboring and sweating for he's meals.
I don't mind being responsible for myself. Though I certainly mind ordained as a 'helper' finding myself laboring for a man.
Will me initiating compromise him of he's ordained role?
Sisygirl.......absolutely not!!!! We who call ourselves Christians on this site are at the very least at a very early stage of connecting, conversing, sharing and learning about possible close friends and or potential life partners!
How you initiate that relationship should have nothing to do with what should already be expected from you both: each performing your roles as "helpmeet" for one another. Whether if you've both mutually decided to just be good friends, your positions should never change.....being a support system to one another in prayer, encouragement, thru good and bad times, etc.! Who you are, is who you are in Christ Jesus Sisygirl, that should never, ever change and no one should try to do so, except The Lord! Stay blessed!
Personally, I would love to be pursued...but only by the right man. LOL!
That said, most of the guys who initiate contact aren't after me; they're after my money (scammers).
The others have not read my profile, or did not take it seriously, so they are NOT the 'right men,' for various reasons. I've had to block a few of those, actually. LOL!
However, I have taken the initiative several times, usually to comment on something I read in the guy's profile (not necessarily to start a relationship), and have received replies in every case except one. But he had not been online in a while, so I figure he must have been in a relationship already and was ignoring the site (was not on CDFF).
I don't have a problem being the one to start a conversation, because I don't expect every conversation to blossom into a relationship. I think there is a lot less pressure when all I'm trying to do is illicit a response to my comment--which is often a compliment on his creativity or humor.
Girls, don't be afraid to say something to the guys on here, if you are so inclined. Even to ask why a guy why he put up an angry-looking photo of himself, Sisygirl ;-) You're not committed to the guy if you just say, "Hi."
Just make it a positive encounter, and you will likely receive a positive reply in return. It could change your perspective about him.
The Book of Ruth shows how she was what we would consider forward to Boaz...and she is in the lineage of Jesus.
Saying hi is what you would do if you passed him on the street or in the store...no different here.
I had one guy who viewed my profile 6 or 7 times so I finally sent a message...he replied with the canned "no thanks" but he stopped viewing my profile!
Teach ib, C4C777.....I simply loved both your posts(smile)! Being strong, confident women of God, is something we all should consistently strive for! Not only in this arena, but in our everyday lives! Thank you both for your continued encouragement(smile)! God bless.
I fully agree with you dear lady with Ruth's passage.
I'm glad that their relationship was rooted on a solid foundation, that was quite a 'move' made by Ruth I must say. Joining a man in bed when he least expected,,,,,,,, was even under a certain influence for that matter, thank God that Baoz wasn't driven by lust. Even if that was Ruth's intention (which we'll never know) Boaz was responsibile enough to tell her to wait until matters were rightfully done in the orderly manner.
To top that up which was a charm on its own, he still provided in the morning when telling her to leave early before seen by anyone. He was a man of integrity, didn't wanna account for actions of being iresponsible when he could have taken advantage of the situation and therefore shaming God's word.
Wish we had more guys like that in the body of Christ, protecting 'us' even from their own lustfulness. If we ladies are coming across a little vulnerable.
I've been off and on on this website for a couple years now and every time I come back I've noticed I stop caring more and more about what I write on my profile as well as the way I view the profile of guys! I have no more fear!!! haha. If I like what I see and read I have no problem sending a wink (if that's what's specified in his profile) or a message with something to lure him into a conversation. Rejection hurts but you never know if you don't try. I reject a lot of guys that email me so it's not fair for me to think that I won't be rejected for the same reasons!
I'm naturally loud in reality so it's not a far cry that I would be fearless in messaging on here. If you can approach a guy in real life than it's the same thing on here except with a bigger safety net because you'll probably never see them again if they reject you! You can send them a :goofball: and tell them they are missing out on one of God's greatest inventions! Haha
