Author	Thread: This is killing me...
Admin	This is killing me... Posted : 16 Oct, 2010 11:58 AM So I am talking to a girl on here occasionally who says she wants to be with me and loves me but she lives on the opposite side of the world. She's like the sweetest girl and I find her really beautiful too. I really like this girl but she says she can't come to the US because of her job and I'm currently studying and broke so I don't know what to do. I guess it's really not God's timing for me to be with anyone right now... This really kills me deeply though because she seems like everything I want in a woman. I would really hate to never have a chance with her... Post Reply
riveroflife1 View Profile History	This is killing me... Posted : 16 Oct, 2010 12:37 PM dont get sucked into sending her money. It sounds like the M.O. of a scammer. not saying she is but be careful! Post Reply
i_live_in_canada View Profile History	This is killing me... Posted : 16 Oct, 2010 03:25 PM Oh hun you are letting your loneliness over ride good judgement. I know your young in comparison to my so please trust me on this. If some one tells you they love you after just a short amount of time it's not love. Especially if you have never even meet. Lust can happen in an instant but love does not. Sorry to be so blunt. It's like a seed that needs to grow roots over time. Your lonely and can easily feel like you are being loved. I told you you reminded me of my brother. He was acting just like your acting right now. It's not just an age thing either. Lots of people much older then you are rushing into relationships. Letting there wanting to be loved take over. In all honesty I think you are not in the place to be having a relationship. If you are thinking a relationship is going to make you happy your going to be very disappointed when the fantasy wears off. You need to be happy and strong first and then have a wonderful lady join you in that happiness. I know this is not what you want to hear. It took me a long time and a lot of mistakes to realize you can't find happiness in a human. That you will be let down if that's what you are after. There is nothing wrong with wanting to have some one. The problem is when you think that person is going to make you happy. Post Reply
View Profile History	This is killing me... Posted : 16 Oct, 2010 06:54 PM How long have u been talking to this girl? Post Reply
View Profile History	This is killing me... Posted : 16 Oct, 2010 07:14 PM Honestly I lost count, maybe a month. LOL. Post Reply
Marie7 View Profile History	This is killing me... Posted : 16 Oct, 2010 07:45 PM Hope you dont mind the same advice the other young ladies are giving you but do be careful. The first thing I noticed when I went into chat rooms is the fact that there are certain very young ladies who will try to attract certain men for obvious reasons. I believe the Sprit of the Lord in me confirms this to help you not make a huge mistake. Be patient and pray always. God Bless you. Marie Post Reply
View Profile History	This is killing me... Posted : 17 Oct, 2010 09:14 AM One month? I do not want to sound condescending or judgmental when I give this advice, but I have to say I am a little shocked that you are so desperate for this woman after only a month. A month is not long enough, over the internet, to understand a person's wants or where they are coming from. Beware of scammers; a lot of men fall victims to scammers, far more than I even imagined. You need way more than a month, and to be talking to other girls as well if you are ready for a relationship, which brings me too... Agreeing with the other ladies' responses. It looks/sounds as if you are simply not ready for a real, meaningful relationship. You seem to be way too excited for this girl, and another warning sign is that "she is everything I want", or however it is you put it. You should be very wary of this instead of so excited; if something seems too good to be true, it very likely is. My opinion is you shouldn't be so torn up about not being able to bring her to you THIS INSTANT, because you clearly cannot, and I think perhaps maybe God is providing this time/distance cushion for a reason. Post Reply
View Profile History	This is killing me... Posted : 17 Oct, 2010 10:47 AM Cool, I get a lot of women from around the world that look at my profile, and most of the women that have me as their favorite are from overseas. I used to get a lot of messages as well, until I turned off the ability to receive overseas messages. I don�t mean to sound cruel, but many of the women are simply looking for a way into the US, they are not looking for the committed relationship that you want. In some countries, like China, there are way more men than women, so there is no real need to look for a husband in the US. I would be very careful about meeting someone from another country. I am not saying that you couldn�t find a good wife overseas, you just have to be very careful. I know what you are going through, Cool. I am 41 years old. I have never been in a relationship, even as a teenager. Not because I have not tried, but because I have tried over and over again and have failed. I know how you feel about being left behind. I have not had a close friend in 17 years, all of my brothers and sisters are married and have children, the oldest are now in college. My family are all busy with their own families and do not have any time for me. Except for the people I see at church, and only at church, I am all alone in this world. I have no one who I can talk to, no one I can go and do things with. I am completely lost when it comes to dating, the only thing I know for sure is that whatever I do, it is always the wrong thing. I have asked for help, but my family have made it very clear that I am on my own. I have sought Biblical counsel, and all I am told is that need to go figure it out on my own. If I can�t figure it out on my own, then I don�t deserve a wife. I even got to the point where almost two years ago I attempted to commit suicide. Not the, �I want attention� type of attempt, I really thought I was going to go home. I am completely lost, the only thing I have to look forward to is loneliness and sorrow. I am telling you all of this, not so that you will feel sorry for me, but because I want you to know that I know where you are coming from. I don�t know all the answers, but I do know a few things. If I remember correctly, you are 24 and still in college. Women your age are going to want you to have a job. You don�t need a really high paying job, they just want you to have something with a future. You want a family, but you have no way to support it. You are trying to put the cart before the horse, and it�s never going to work out. I understand that you feel like life is leaving you behind, but you can�t catch up by taking short cuts, you need to get finished with your college first. I know that means that it will be about 3 years away before you even have a chance at getting married, but if you don�t work it through, you are not likely to ever have a family. My recommendation for you right now is to stop dating. All you are going to do is fail, and all your failure is going to ruin your self-confidence. You are only hurting yourself by trying to get what you can�t have at this point in your life. I am not trying to be mean, or cruel. I am trying to let you know that you are just beating your head against the wall, and you will get nowhere. Post Reply
cowgirl1984 View Profile History	This is killing me... Posted : 17 Oct, 2010 11:15 AM Cool, Between some of your other posts in previous threads and this thread right here, you are definitely not ready for a relationship. It sounds like you need to completely back off from searching for any woman, even as a friend. You need to be happy and content being SINGLE for quite a while before you can have a successful relationship. She is a scammer. She either wants money or a green card. Stay away from her. I don't want to be harsh, but that was my first thought before I even glanced at anyone else's posts. Everyone on here is right. STAY FAR AWAY FROM HER. Post Reply
View Profile History	This is killing me... Posted : 17 Oct, 2010 11:22 AM Yeah, you're right... I can't believe it's taken me this long to realize but I gotta make some big changes in my life. I do need to get through school and have a job before I even think about dating. Guess all I can really do is my best in life and give the rest to God. Feel like I'm always miles behind everyone else and my entire life is a game of catchup instead of a joyous one. But maybe then again the things that once mattered to me don't really matter at all, or shouldn't. I don't care if I ever have the nicest of everything or if I have fame or fortune, I just want to find peace and a place in this world. It would be nice to have friends though. Living a life alone sucks... To be honest I feel like an idiot most days. I keep doing things I later regret, things that are so silly. I'm really trying to do what's right and grow up. Sad part is I don't know what i want from this life anymore. I would like a Godly loving wife and children and other things but I really just want to get my life right with God and fix myself before anything else. It's a long road and the trudgery makes me depressed but it's what I gotta do. One step by step, one stupid brick by stupid brick. LOL. Post Reply
View Profile History	This is killing me... Posted : 17 Oct, 2010 01:05 PM I feel you, Cool and Cobbler... I've always felt really left out of everything. As a teenager I was sick all the time until over a year ago a surgery that wasn't supposed to be related suddenly cured me. I went to a prestigious college before that, left after only a semester because I couldn't handle it. Even though I'm still really young (turned 22 yesterday), I feel way behind my peers who are juniors and seniors at nicer schools with better job and money prospect, while I am still at home struggling with community college classes (not because I can't handle them, but because the school I go to is too big for its own good, and the classes too big for the under-qualified teachers to get their acts together). While I have a great boyfriend I met on here, I often lament not having more friends or activities. After taking my sister to the airport so she could go back to her exciting life in Germany, I had a complete meltdown because my life isn't "what I expected". As a result, I want to be escapist and wish for a magical world where my boyfriend suddenly has tons of money and I never have to finish getting my stupid degree that even then won't earn much... Completely different scenario, but I dunno, I feel like they have things in common... :goofball: Post Reply

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