Author	Thread: How does your Christian heart and spirit feel about "harmless white lies"? Are they TRULY "harmless'" in a Christian lifestyle? Is "Santa Claus" a "white lie" that God sees as "harmless" and OK for Christians to be a part of fostering in their younger children's lives, like the world believes?
Admin	How does your Christian heart and spirit feel about "harmless white lies"? Are they TRULY "harmless'" in a Christian lifestyle? Is "Santa Claus" a "white lie" that God sees as "harmless" and OK for Christians to be a part of fostering in their younger children's lives, like the world believes? Posted : 9 Nov, 2010 09:06 AM How should Christian parents and relatives TRULY deal with "Santa Claus" at Christmastime to bring honor, glory and praise to God in the parenting of their children at EVERY age? This question is for the gals AND guys, of course ... and one that always come up as bothersome to my heart and spirit at this time of year ... I keep wondering why it should even be considered as a "fun necessity" for younger children and "harmless" to lead them to believe there is a "Santa Claus" who brings them their Christmas gifts? I'm "none the worse for wear", I admit, because MY parents allowed ME to believe in the myth of "Santa Claus" delivering our Christmas gifts at that age, but still ... I think I would've been just as pleased to know that the gifts I received at Christmas were given out of love by my relatives without "Santa Clause's" involvement at all, as representative of God's love for all of us and His giving of His Son in the birth of Jesus as the Savior of the world from sin, which is what Christmas was originally and is STILL what it SHOULD only be about for Christians!!! So ... this is another two-fold question ... first about "harmless white lies" in general ... then, specifically, about the so-felt by so many "harmless white lie" of telling young children there is a "Santa Claus". Steve Post Reply
View Profile History	How does your Christian heart and spirit feel about "harmless white lies"? Are they TRULY "harmless'" in a Christian lifestyle? Is "Santa Claus" a "white lie" that God sees as "harmless" and OK for Christians to be a part of fostering in their younger children's lives, like the world believes? Posted : 9 Nov, 2010 08:03 PM I think your absolutely right, BCpianogal. If I lead my child to believe in what I know to be untrue...then, when I do tell her the Truth, why would she believe me...how can she trust me? Post Reply
SeaBreezes View Profile History	How does your Christian heart and spirit feel about "harmless white lies"? Are they TRULY "harmless'" in a Christian lifestyle? Is "Santa Claus" a "white lie" that God sees as "harmless" and OK for Christians to be a part of fostering in their younger children's lives, like the world believes? Posted : 9 Nov, 2010 09:08 PM I never believed in Santa Claus or Easter Bunny, etc. I would never lie to a child and lead them to believe that he is real. I have personally known a couple of people who did believe in Santa and then were so crushed when they found out that their parents had lied to them. They did not trust their parents when they talked about Jesus. I don't lie to kids so if a child has been taught to believe in Santa and asks me if Santa is real I tell them: "No, Santa Clause is just pretend. People have a lot of fun pretending about Santa and adults sometimes think it will be better if children think that Santa is real - which is silly because kids are the BEST at pretending!" They usually accept this really well because they pretend to be all kinds of characters and they have just as much fun pretending as they would if they believed Santa was real. Post Reply
marikashome View Profile History	How does your Christian heart and spirit feel about "harmless white lies"? Are they TRULY "harmless'" in a Christian lifestyle? Is "Santa Claus" a "white lie" that God sees as "harmless" and OK for Christians to be a part of fostering in their younger children's lives, like the world believes? Posted : 10 Nov, 2010 08:12 AM How finding out there is no Santa affects kids very differently. The "Santa gifts" under our tree were always blank in the "from" area, but Dad enjoyed teasing about Santa coming, we sang songs about Santa, watched Christmas movies about him, and had story books about him. We fully believed in him. When I confronted my parents about whether Santa was them, they hesitatingly said yes. I ran to them and hugged them and then said good night. It didn't upset me; I felt very loved. When my little sister found out, she bawled and said, "The next thing you'll tell me is there isn't a tooth fairy!!!" Ummm... well... actually, now that you mention it... :rolleyes: It was a very difficult situation. She swore her kids would never believe in Santa, and that she'd never lie to them like that. But they do believe in Santa. I don't think all white lies are harmful. The Ten Commandments doesn't say "thou shalt not lie." They say "Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor." However, we should be cautious what we lead our children to believe. Christmas should be mainly about Christ, not Santa. But there are some good lessons to learn in the Santa stories too. Lessons about love and giving. Even with all the media hype promoting Santa, I think that it's possible to teach kids about selfless giving in a way that they can believe in Santa but not be wounded when they realize not everything they've heard is true. Let them "play Santa" by helping wrap gifts for needy families, by singing to nursing home patients, or helping in a soup kitchen. Talk to them about the joy of giving, of giving selflessly and wholeheartedly. Explain that's what Jesus did when He came to earth... and that's what the stories about Santa symbolize in their own way, too. Post Reply
View Profile History	How does your Christian heart and spirit feel about "harmless white lies"? Are they TRULY "harmless'" in a Christian lifestyle? Is "Santa Claus" a "white lie" that God sees as "harmless" and OK for Christians to be a part of fostering in their younger children's lives, like the world believes? Posted : 10 Nov, 2010 08:31 AM Thanks for all the great replies, everyone!!! :hearts::hearts::hearts: Steve Post Reply
View Profile History	How does your Christian heart and spirit feel about "harmless white lies"? Are they TRULY "harmless'" in a Christian lifestyle? Is "Santa Claus" a "white lie" that God sees as "harmless" and OK for Christians to be a part of fostering in their younger children's lives, like the world believes? Posted : 10 Nov, 2010 09:58 AM I was beginning to feel I was the only one who believed in Santa until I saw Tulip and Marikas posts. I personally don't think it's wrong to teach children about Santa, as long as you make sure that they understand Christ is the reason for the season. As far as the tooth fairy goes, I have gotten up many times in the middle of the night rummaging through my pockets and under chair cushions trying to come up with enough loose change to put under my son's pillow. I almost got caught once and had a little explaining to do though. Post Reply
View Profile History	How does your Christian heart and spirit feel about "harmless white lies"? Are they TRULY "harmless'" in a Christian lifestyle? Is "Santa Claus" a "white lie" that God sees as "harmless" and OK for Christians to be a part of fostering in their younger children's lives, like the world believes? Posted : 10 Nov, 2010 10:30 AM No lies ever! Post Reply
DEEDEE72 View Profile History	How does your Christian heart and spirit feel about "harmless white lies"? Are they TRULY "harmless'" in a Christian lifestyle? Is "Santa Claus" a "white lie" that God sees as "harmless" and OK for Christians to be a part of fostering in their younger children's lives, like the world believes? Posted : 10 Nov, 2010 07:33 PM I never believed in Santa Claus I always knew my parents bought my gifts. They always asked me what I wanted. I did believe in the tooth fairy though. I remember my innocence was shattered in the 4th grade when I class mate (Tyrone) said he caught his parents putting money under his pillow. I was so upset by the news. I got in the car that day after school and I asked my mom if that was true. She never said a word and I never got any more money from the tooth fairy ever again.... Post Reply
View Profile History	How does your Christian heart and spirit feel about "harmless white lies"? Are they TRULY "harmless'" in a Christian lifestyle? Is "Santa Claus" a "white lie" that God sees as "harmless" and OK for Christians to be a part of fostering in their younger children's lives, like the world believes? Posted : 10 Nov, 2010 11:32 PM I think that the occasions where "white lies" are appropriate are very rare. We should seek to tell the truth in love at all times and trust the outcome of those interaction to the Lord. As far as telling children about things such as Santa, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy (in as far as presenting them as being real), I am VERY much opposed to that. Speaking from a child development standpoint, children are very literal for many years, meaning that they pretty much will take what you say at face value. They're not able to make that differentiation between a lie "just for fun" and malicious deception. When children are in that very literal phase, they don't perceive motives in the same way as adults do. So, telling a child about Santa, etc. is detrimental for 3 reasons here: 1. It causes the child to see the parents as people who aren't truthful. Because the child doesn't truly understand the idea of a "white lie" being different from other lies, all they're going to see there, on the deep soul level is that mommy and daddy are liars who cannot always be believed. Obviously, this damages the trust that should be there in a healthy parent-child relationship, even it's only on a very subconscious level that isn't apparent at the time. 2. It causes the child to think that ALL lies are okay since the "white ones" are okay with mommy and daddy. That's why being around children is so refreshing... they tell it like it is, without doing all of that hair-splitting that adults do. White lies to young children aren't in a separate category from other lies. A lie is a lie is a lie. This is has the affect then of giving children a false, unbiblical view of sin, which then later has to be counteracted to effectively minister to your children as the Bible calls you to do. 3. It teaches children that delusions are a normal aspect of childhood and life. This can play out in so many ways, but what I'm going to bring up here is the issue of sexual abuse. It's common for childhood sexual abuse to be done under the guise of being some kind of "game" that involves dress-up. When I was being abused, the main people involved in that would dress up like witches and us girls would pretend to be various characters from "The Wizard of Oz." This kind of thing -- where an adult dresses up in costume and injects themselves into a child's life as this character -- should raise an alarm with a child. But, when a parent presents Santa, etc. as being real, they disarm that alarm system in their child. Again, children are literal... An adult dressed in costume trying to lure them into a sex scheme isn't going to necessarily be any different in their minds as Santa. They're both adults in costume presenting something that is "fun." Normal adults do not walk around in costume breaking into people's homes and depositing gifts. When people feed that delusion to their children, their teach their children that those things are acceptable things for adults to do when interacting with children. It teaches them that boundaries (such as the walls of your home or your clothes) are okay to be crossed. For me, the whole things about children being literal is something that really stands out to me because my brother has autism. He heard that Santa was real (from other people, NOT our parents), and there isn't anything that we've been able to say to counteract that. Developmentally, he's stuck in that literal phase... He's never moved beyond that. To him, reading a children's book about Santa is absolutely no different from reading a Bible story. Bible characters and Santa are one in the same to him. He doesn't understand the concept of one book being fantasy and the other one being real. They're both books and are no different in his mind. From a spiritual standpoint, I fail to see how presenting Santa and the Easter Bunny alongside Jesus is appropriate. I think that if we're really serious about teaching children the true meaning of Christmas and Easter that we wouldn't want to pull other things into the mix to muddy the waters there. There are SO many fun, neat things you can do with you children around these times that could easily rival the fun of Santa and the Easter and also teach them Biblical precepts and the character of Jesus. All of that said, I see nothing wrong with informing children of how the delusions/fantasies of how Santa came to be. It presented properly to a child, the child will be able to see Santa as a fairy tale character, similar to Cinderella or nursery rhyme characters. Fantasy does have some basis in fact many times, and it can be okay to teach children those things from a historical standpoint, as long as we're very clear that those things aren't real. But even with that, I really think that a parents has to be careful and sensitive to where the child is at developmentally. When I was growing up, we celebrated St. Nicholas Day. My maternal grandfather immigrated to the States from Sweden and St. Nick is/was a pretty big deal over there, I guess. My mother told us about St. Nick, but never did it in the kind of way that implied that he was reincarnated in Santa. She talked about his generosity and how we could show love to people in similar ways. She had a pair of wooden shoes (for decorative purposes -- not to wear) that she'd lay out on the eve of St. Nick's Day. She'd put small gifts in the shoes after my brother and I had gone to bed. And the next day, after we'd looked at the stuff in the shoes, the shoes would be put away again. They weren't out there the entire Christmas season and weren't presented as something that was mixed in with Jesus. My mother was always very clear that we celebrated St. Nick's Day as a way to remember our grandfather (he died when my brother and I were 5 and almost 3, respectively) and our Swedish roots. Post Reply
View Profile History	How does your Christian heart and spirit feel about "harmless white lies"? Are they TRULY "harmless'" in a Christian lifestyle? Is "Santa Claus" a "white lie" that God sees as "harmless" and OK for Christians to be a part of fostering in their younger children's lives, like the world believes? Posted : 12 Nov, 2010 08:37 AM To: Barefoot & Twosparrows,i have noticed that part FOR YEARS NOW!!& that is why i don't follow all of those songs & storys that talk about him! Also it's rediclulious to even hear gospel singers singing about santa (satan) & other "secular nonpraising Jesus" songs !:devil::angeldevil: As for me if JESUS IS the "REASON for the SEASON" then we don't need to be carried away with all of the food,decorations & time- just like the world! It's so bad these days that most churches seems to talk about Jesus only ONCE A YEAR! To the white lies part brother B.f.t, letting your children believe in santa,the tooth fairy & Easter bunny & even holloweeen(which was originally called holyweekend) is making them life to lies already!Another thing that get to me is for years now,people are replacing the "Chirist" with an "X" in Christmas! Post Reply
View Profile History	How does your Christian heart and spirit feel about "harmless white lies"? Are they TRULY "harmless'" in a Christian lifestyle? Is "Santa Claus" a "white lie" that God sees as "harmless" and OK for Christians to be a part of fostering in their younger children's lives, like the world believes? Posted : 12 Nov, 2010 08:52 AM TO"BCP,if your intersted,look out for a small little comic book name "Tooth Fairy?" by Chick Publications.That is a possibility of how what could happen when grown up believeing in these things! Post Reply

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