So this is probably the first of a bunch of dumb questions I still have about girls, but till now haven't asked because I'm embarrassed at how childish and whiney they sound. They're honest questions and something I really wonder, I'm not cynical or volitile or trying to talk down to or hurt any feelings or anything so here goes:
What is it exactly that makes women think they're so great? The way the roles are seem pretty lopsided, if you ask me and for all the risks we take and effort we put into it, it doesn't seem like we get much back in return. Men are the ones that choose to try and women are the ones that just choose and it seems like all give and in return we get nothing except somebody that looks nice, but will let you down as soon as you start trusting and enjoying her and basically I've moved beyond asking 'When does this get fun, exactly?' to 'Does this get ever get fun?'
Basically (and again I mean absolutely no offense whatsoever) "Why should I even bother?"; "What's so great about women anyway if you can never enjoy or rely on them?"; "Why do you expect us to do things you're not willing to do yourself?"; And I suppose that's enough for now, but more like that will come up later, again the point of this is strictly objective, and basically what it comes down to is this:
I don't mean to offend. I want to genuinely respect and appreciate women, but right now, I'm just not seeing it. Help me out please.
It's not an age thing. It's a feminist American female thing, quite honestly. You'll find exceptions, though, and more exceptions everyday as women figure out what a crock of feces feminism is. But it's still there in the background.
And here's the thing that chapped me to NO end -- the AMOUNT of sacrifice that a guy must undertake even to get a nod of acknowledgement. Car, house, $$, future, reasonable social skills, interests (but not any weird interests!), a ministry, multiple spiritual gifts, and the list goes on. So you start adding up the time it takes to get all that, if you even can, and you're left wondering if women are more in love with romance novel heroes than real people.
For every 50 messages, guys are lucky to get one response. And I'm talking about messages that are reasonably funny, key off stuff in the profile, ask questions, and aren't pervy. You try doing that sometime and let me know how enjoyable you find it. (And yes, I've read the profiles which is why I'm dead certain I'm not hitting their dealbreakers.)
So, welcome to life as a guy. OP, I'm right there with you. I used to be a lot, lot more angsty about this, and it still pops up from time to time, but now, I'm just -- I dunno, really. I feel nothing at all.
Amen to your commentary! No one is perfect by no means, however the church is full of people, men and women alike, who are there for self edification, and self aggrandizement. As well, Most men �By Their Nature� carry a certain arrogance. Perhaps it is the difference between Testosterone and Estrogen, yet in spite of that, many women are just as arrogant as the men. At one point in history the two could almost meet in the middle. Somehow, they in a seemed to cancelled each other out. Now the men act like women and the women act like men. I feel bad for the young fellow in question here. He may be facing an entire lifetime of one broken relationship after another, presuming he can find a female that acts like a female. Society (WE) have let this happen, and the church is doing little to nothing about addressing the issue. There are God ways and peoples ways. We continue to let this happen by continuing the same old behavior time, after time, after time. Isn�t time all this stopped!
You questions are NOT in the least CHILDISH! All of this CONFUSION regarding GENDER roles between men AND women has happened, I believe, as a result of the women's lib movement, which was full and still is full of Lesbians, who WRONGLY believe THEY are SUPERIOR to MEN. These "bra burners" DON'T want any part of the stereotypical Biblically-based Husband and Wife relationship which GOD created (which I ALSO adhere to, MYSELF), as THEY believe that it's "oldfashioned". How can GOD be "old-fashioned"?! In God's Holy Bible, He ddresses ANCIENT issues and CURRENT issues happening in our World, TODAY! (A thorough study of Bible Prophecy proves this is TRUE!)
My concern is that this young gentleman who initiated these questions has already become embittered by the controlling women he's come across, and he may REMAIN embittered against WOMEN the rest of his life and remain SINGLE or he may decide HOMOSEXUAL relationships are his only OTHER option! God does NOT condone either being BITTER nor for us to engage in HOMOSEXUALITY. I truly wish more of our YOUNGER women would adopt the old-fashioned views their Grandparents held of GOD'S roles for us women and men!
God did NOT create WOMEN first: He FIRST created ADAM. However, God created EVE from Adam's RIB, indicating his Wife was to stand BESIDE him in a partnership of love and permanency (although most men and women are HONEST enough to admit they formerly FAILED in this regard). Men AREN'T supposed to treat women SUBSERVIENT to them or ABUSE them, i.e., she ISN'T supposed to walk BEHIND her man nor be TRAMPLED under his FEET, like we've ALL seen happening in traditionally Islamic societies and other religious societies around our World (including in the religious cults), and sadly, also in Christian and Jewish marriages. This has ALSO happened to many teen GIRLS who were ABUSED by their BOYFRIENDS. I believe a GIRL or WOMEN'S desire to have total CONTROL in a LOVE relationship is actually a CRY from someone who was formerly ABUSED (and very possibly RAPED) by some BOY or MAN who WASN'T taught to LOVE and RESPECT women and treat them like they, THEMSELVES, want to be treated. Remember this famous quote: "Do unto OTHERS as YOU would have THEM do unto YOU"? Because SHE felt she had NO control over her OWN life in the PAST, she NOW demands CONTROL over all FUTURE relationships with BOYS or MEN. A girl and woman, as well as a boy and man can OVERCOME their need to CONTROL others if they go through CHRISTIAN counseling and have a mate who is understanding, compassionate, tender, gentle and loving. In many instances, BOYS and MEN become CONTROL freaks who want to control WOMEN, after having witnessed their FATHERS abusing their MOTHERS, so they WRONGLY think that THEY are supposed to CONTROL their MATES in ALL of their relationships; through FORCE! Emotionally HEALTHY males and females DON'T resort to extreme CONTROLLING behavior in relationships.
GOD says the HUSBAND is supposed to LOVE his WIFE like Jesus LOVES His CHURCH (a really STRONG statement to MEN); and GOD says the WIFE is to LOVE and RESPECT her Husband (including FINAL decisions HE feels are necessary for the GOOD of his family). NOTE: Because God created Adam (man) FIRST, and didn't PUNISH Adam and Eve until AFTER Adam had ALSO tasted of the forbidden fruit, that indicates TWO things to me: GOD intended for MAN to be the SPIRITUAL leader of his family, as well as to HEAD his family, because God holds HIM responsible for any decisions HE makes for his FAMILY.
I realize my old-fashioned Biblical viewpoints will "rattle the cages" of some of today's female libbers, but GOD gave us HIS intention for our GENDER roles on Earth. I believe God WON'T change our gender roles since the Bible tells us God NEVER changes: He is the SAME, yesterday, today, and tomorrow!
God also WARNS us against homosexuality, fornication, adultery, gossip, drunkeness, and extreme partying, and declares ANYONE who participates in these things WON'T be allowed to ENTER His HEAVENLY KINGDOM! Some MIGHT believe that makes God HARSH, but as HE explains, just like EARTHLY Parents who PUNISH their children to PROTECT them, because they LOVE their children, God ALSO punishes US for the SAME reasons.
God is a LOVING God--He does NOT wait around for us to do something WRONG so He can HAMMER us, but He IS a God of JUDGMENT, and His Word WARNS us we ALL will undergo JUDGMENT one day, whether WE want to ACCEPT that fact is immaterial, since it WILL happen: there will be a separate Judgment of BELIEVERS and of NONBELIEVERS, a/k/a the White Throne Judgment.
Because God is a PERFECT, He can't STAND to LOOK upon our SIN, and the ONLY way that WE could be FORGIVEN of our SINS was for GOD to create a BRIDGE between HIM and MANKIND. The ONLY one QUALIFIED to BRIDGE that GAP between GOD and US was God's ONLY Begotten Son, Jesus Christ, and the ONLY one QUALIFIED to COVER all OUR Sins with HIS own BLOOD on the CROSS on Calvary, was God's ONLY Begotten Son, Yeshua HaMashiach (Jesus our Messiah as HE is called in Hebrew by Messianic Jewish Believers). It's WHY we are taught to LOVE and FEAR God, the word "fear" ALSO means we RESPECT and REVERE God for HE was the one who CREATED us and created EVERYTHING on Earth, in the Heavens, and under the Seas! God PROVIDES for ALL our NEEDS, which means WE are supposed to be GRATEFUL people who PRAISE, MAGNIFY, and THANK our HEAVENLY FATHER!
God has gifted me with speaking to him in tongues and by praying to him in my Heavenly Language (tonques) God has given me--in our quiet time ALONE--He has revealed MUCH to me. When Jews pray to God they use a Tallit (a prayer shawl), which they place over their heads and close, and it becomes their "prayer closet". I also own one, but I usually use a sleep mask as my "prayer closet", as I pray in my bed. Whatever methods you chose to use to create your "prayer close" (alone time with God), remember this: God desires a personal relationships with each and every one of His "kids"! There is no other god who reveals His LOVE for us as much as the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, the God who is worshipped by Christians and Jews, alike. For those of you who are unaware, Messianic Jews also believe Jesus Christ is their Messiah! That's why GENUINE Christians would NEVER hate God's Chosen People, the Jews!
