So we meet on line and exchange emails. We graduate to phone calls and we ask each other questions. I tell you how I love Sushi and BBQ. I tell you my work schdule. We spend hours talking about alot of different things. ...I usually let the man lead and drive the pace of the relationship. When we will go from emails to calls.
I would like to know that you have being paying attention to our phone calls and emails. So then I get asked out on a date.
A woman wants to hear "I would love to make plans to take you to dinner on Saturday at 8 pm, or coffee of iced cream." How does that sound? Let her know you have given it some thought and put some effort into the plan. Let her know you are listening.
Women do not want you pushing this off on her. If she is talking to you and emailing you then she is interested.
What we are not looking for. We should meet up. You suggest we get together on the weekend and then ask. Where she wants to go?
I know men get frustrated with women because we expect them to be mind readers. We actually don't we. You have no idea how great it feels to be asked out and feel special enough that he took some time to plan it.
This does not mean you have to spend money on expensive dinners. Just invite me to a walk in the park.
We women love the small things and especially a man who thinks outside of the box..She will brag about you all day at work...Smile
So my thoughts from a woman's perspective on dating 101. Ask her out and plan the date.....You could be setting up a great story to tell your grand kids!
Sadly, too many men think it's respectful to let the woman pick everything.
Also, remember how it feels to have someone desire you enough to plan a special time together, and make sure you reciprocate. We like to be thought for just as much, if not more than you do. After all, we've been told since we were young about all the things men are supposed to do with women, and without reciprocation, we often come out feeling like we got the short end of the stick.
I heard it's best to get to know something about her background (ethnicity, places she's visited or wants to, whims she tends to have, etc) then pick a place based on that. Ask her if there was any place in particular she'd want to go or any preferences and if she doesn't have one casually slide that card out of your sleeve and say you know a great ______ resteraunt and say some things you like about it (familiarize yourself with the different local restaraunts before you go). Also the only thing you should need to 'make it worth our while' is just be yourself and have a good time.
The story I am going to share is kinda off the topic but I think the idea of the story and the topic is pretty similar =)
Last valentine day my coworker was soooo confused on how to give his gf a very special gift that showed the girl that how much she meant for him.
Then, he asked me and my girlfriends on what he should buy for a gift. Everyone was suggesting him with flowers, chocolate, teddy bear, and cellphone. So, he decided to buy her a cellphone for they could have longer and cheaper talks.
The crowd was dismissed, I told him on private that the only girl wanted in a gift was how much effort he would be given to make the girl felt special. He asked me how, I told him it was his business, he just needed to be himself and he knew better what would make that girl felt special.
Then we went home and met again at the office the next day. He had a smile in his face and asked me to sit next to him. He told me that he gave that cellphone to her then his girl reaction was just like it was the gift she received everyday, she wasn't mad or disappointed, but she wasn't jumping around excitedly either. After she took the cellphone, he asked her for dinner. They started to use their jacket (my friend rode a motorcycle) then they hopped on the motorcycle. His gf always put her hands on his jacket to protect her hands from cold of the blown mind. She found a candy on his jacket and he told her simply "It's for you", her face was similar to a child in a candy store. She held him tight and they went off to dinner. After delivering her into her home and got back to his own house, she texted him thanking for the candy (NOTE: no cellphone nor romantic dinner mentioned), and she still mentioned the candy the next day they met.
The idea of the story is, even simplest gift could make us (women) melt. And, not always fancy things could make us flattered. I think it's just simple, unique, personal and unexpected.
Also, as a single mother for a very long time, I dont want to make the decision of where to go or meet or anything. i've been making decisions for so long, I just want him to do it.
He makes the plans and I'll roll with it :)
I could never date a passive man. He's gotta take charge most of the time. Well, we all have our roles and I know mine.
"Women do not want you pushing this off on her. If she is talking to you and emailing you then she is interested."
Boy do I wish that were that easy. Women email and talk to guys for TONS of reasons, and attraction is one of them, but not the only one. It's not even the most commonly-occurring reason.
"So my thoughts from a woman's perspective on dating 101. Ask her out and plan the date.....You could be setting up a great story to tell your grand kids!"
Yes, you might, but that outcome is extremely rare. The other 9999 times that the guy TRIES and FAILS he'll be wishing he was home playing WoW or something.
Dating makes about as much sense as playing the lottery, only the lottery has better odds and is more rewarding.
I have to agree with silverfire, there are many reasons person may be communicating. I remember once was chatting with a girl and she was wanting to meet, but ended up being her fantasy online game, and she really had a bf, so obviously we never met! lol
Also, I am a passive guy, so if a woman doesn't want that, then helps her weed out and helps me weed out people. I would have been better off with an arranged marriage, not into the whole dating game.
