hello my fellow brothers and sisters. i'm not sure if this is the right place for this post so forgive me please.
as i go about running errands or shopping, etc. i've noticed that people (saved and unsaved) are much more kinder, considerate, and respectful to complete strangers than their love ones.
please allow me to explain. complete strangers hold doors open for other strangers, greet and smile, say excuse me, please, thank you, have a nice day, etc., co-workers do the same, church members do the same, etc. everyone shows respect for one another (most of the time).
yet, i've witnessed people treating their own families, their love ones, like cr*ap! they're yelling at each other, using bad language, hitting, dirty looks to one another, showing anger/resentment/bitterness/jealousy/hatred towards one another, denying to do favors for family, don't use good manners, etc.
so my question or complaint is this: why do we treat the ones that we love the most, the closest to our heart like this?
if i feel badly every time i witness this, i can only imagine how our Lord God must feel since he has a wider view and knows all. it's heartbreaking, isn't it?
First of all, should this really be a surprise? We are not born good but sinful with a selfish nature. Any good that any of us ever do is because of God, not because of us. God gets all the credit - always. - so that he who boasts, boasts in the Lord. (1 Cor 1:31). Even after receiving Christ, it is a continual process of cleansing that is never perfected in this body. So, do not be surprised by selfishness.
Second, a lot of what you say has to do with American culture. In my experience, I do not see the same lack of respect to family members in Asian cultures. We do not have a particularly good culture when it comes to family in America because of the unbalanced emphasis on individuality and if you observe our entertainment over the last 30 years it has increasingly become more and more depraved and demonstrates an unabashed irreverance to any concept of family, love, and God - and all of this is affecting us continually even if we do no watch.
Third, I think the main reason that you see a discrepancy is that we are able to let our guard down when we are with people we feel comfortable. In other words, we are truly more ourselves around family and friends and thus you are seeing more selfishness because that is our inherent nature, apart from Christ. That is our fallen Adamic nature that must be crucificed and replaced but this is a process and it is painful and it is actually a good thing when it revealed to us so that we can further deal with it by God's good grace and power.
Wow, Linnie! That video was so simple, yet so moving! We all need to think about how we treat others everyday and make the decision every day...to do better.
Zoe, you just hit like, the biggest fattest nail right on the head with this observation.
My ex used to treat me like doggie doo all the time, and I would tell her, you know, if you treated your freinds like you treat me, they would not be your freinds...
We get comfortable, take eachother for granted and feel like we can get away with *#^$ with our families because they are stuck with us or something. It's like you just let your guard down or something and feel like you can treat them anyway you feel like it, and have no conscience about it.
Oddly enough, I was never guilty of this, I always treated/treat my family and freinds the way I want to be treated. but man have I ever seen other people do it. My family is not like that though, we treat eachother with genuine respect, courtesy and love.
Just look at the way you treat the people around you (ALL OF THEM) and think about how Jesus said that *they will know you are my disciples by the love you have for one another* There's a mandate in there... DO THIS!
Alex thanks for sharing. i was also in the same situation you mentioned about your ex. my ex treated me badly. i would always say to him, 'you're like this different man around your friends, co-workers, family etc." he never changed his ways. but i pray for him all the time.
Parents look at their childrens lives and what they do with it as a direct reflection on them. If you are happy with the choices you've made, then ACT like it. If they see you as being happy, then they've done their job. You will never be able to convince them any other way.
Hope this helps, Sandy
Hey Zoe, You are so right , we do treat the one's we love with less care than strangers. It is sad, but I guess we just let our guard down at home or around loved ones. If we would just stop and think..What if this is the last time I see them. I know we would begin to treat our loved ones differently.
