How to love your Future Wife as Christ loved the church?
Posted : 6 Oct, 2025 04:55 AM
To "love your wife as Christ loved the church" means to love her with a sacrificial, selfless, and purifying love that leads to her holiness and spiritual growth. This involves husbands giving themselves up for their wives, cherishing them, serving them with kindness, nourishing them spiritually and emotionally, and ultimately presenting them to God in perfection.
Key Aspects of this Love
Sacrifice: Like Christ gave His life for the church, husbands are called to make sacrificial efforts for their wives, putting her needs and well-being before their own.
Purification and Nurturing: Christ loved the church by cleansing and sanctifying her, so husbands should help their wives grow in holiness, guiding her towards righteousness and spiritual perfection.
Selflessness and Devotion: This love is not about self-seeking pleasure but about a deep, unwavering devotion and commitment to the wife's total good.
Service and Care: Husbands should serve their wives by actively caring for their needs, attending to their emotional lives, and providing support.
Growth and Presentation to God: A purposeful husband will focus on the long-term goal of presenting his wife to God as a radiant, blameless individual, full of splendor.
Practical Application for Husbands
Know Her Deeply: Pay attention to her hopes, fears, and dreams to understand her emotional life and connect with her heart.
Be Present and Engaged: Make time for her, listen to her, and speak kindly about her so she feels safe and loved.
Offer Sacrifice: Be willing to give up things for her, whether it's personal comfort, pride, or ego.
Lead and Nurture Spiritual Growth: Provide a godly example and guide her in her walk with God, much like Christ does for the church.
Cherish Her as You Cherish Yourself: Love your wife as your own body, feeding and caring for her as you would your own flesh.
Are Modern Godly Men nowadays still willing to do all these? Or just the Traditional Men?
How to love your Future Wife as Christ loved the church?
Posted : 6 Oct, 2025 11:37 AM
He will benefit alot and its Biblical.
He Receives Respect and Honor
Ephesians 5:33 says:
> “Let the wife see that she respects her husband.”
When a wife honors her husband — speaking well of him, trusting his leadership, and showing admiration — it nourishes his spirit.
Men thrive in an atmosphere of respect; it gives them confidence to lead lovingly and courage to serve sacrificially.
What he receives:
A woman who believes in him
Emotional security and affirmation
Motivation to keep loving and serving well
A godly wife brings wisdom, insight, discernment, and balance. Together they form a team that reflects the wholeness of God’s image.
What he receives:
A trusted confidante and wise counselor
Shared strength and companionship
A safe space to be human, not just “the leader”
He Experiences Peace, Comfort, and Joy
A loving wife brings warmth, peace, and joy into a man’s life. Her presence turns a house into a home, her words soothe his spirit, and her loyalty becomes his anchor.
He Enjoys Intimacy and Emotional Connection
1 Corinthians 7:3–4 teaches mutual giving in marriage.
When a wife feels loved and secure, she responds with affection, tenderness, and emotional openness. The physical and emotional bond between them deepens, bringing joy and unity.
He Receives God’s Blessing Through Her
A godly woman carries divine favor into her home.
Proverbs 31:11–12 says:
> “The heart of her husband safely trusts her… She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.”
Her faith, prayer, and character draw blessings into their marriage. She becomes an instrument of grace in his life — a channel of peace and prosperity.
When a husband loves as Christ loves,
and a wife responds as the Church responds to Christ,
they create a divine harmony where each completes the other.
He gives: love, protection, leadership, sacrifice.
She gives: respect, support, devotion, and life-giving partnership.
Together, they reflect Christ and the Church — love and reverence intertwined.
How to love your Future Wife as Christ loved the church?
Posted : 6 Oct, 2025 01:13 PM
A man in the Philippines may receive many of those things but here in the states and other western countries feminism has permeated every aspect of relationships including those in the Church to the point where finding a True Biblical believing woman has become extremely rare.
For most Christian women being biblically submissive to any man including a husband is ignored among other things. As I'm sure you are aware many western men move to countries like the Philippines after they have been divorced and raked over the coals by their first wife in the hopes of finding another wife they can spend their last years in a happy marriage.
How to love your Future Wife as Christ loved the church?
Posted : 6 Oct, 2025 03:55 PM
When one does not do all that, I suppose it is justification for divorce.
The Bible also says, "He that loveth father or mother more than Me, is not worthy of Me. And he that loveth son or daughter more than Me, is not worthy of Me." (Matthew 10:37)
“If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even their own life—such a person cannot be my disciple." (Luke 14:26)
"And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or wife or children or fields for my sake will receive a hundred times as much and will inherit eternal life." (Matthew 19:29)
“Truly I tell you,” Jesus said to them, “no one who has left home or wife or brothers or sisters or parents or children for the sake of the kingdom of God will fail to receive many times as much in this age, and in the age to come eternal life.” (Luke 18:29-30)
So, the Bible says a few things.
And the Bible also says to teach younger women to love their husbands and children. (Titus 2:4)
But more marriages go the way of divorce and that is why New Testament says "If this is the situation between a husband and his wife, it is better not to marry." (Matthew 19:10)
Paul also said that it is good for a man not to touch a woman. (1 Corinthians 7:1)
Of course, this is a dating site, and we all want to touch each other.
But I am just throwing out Bible verses as I think of them. Reality now days is it is good not to marry. Women want abortion, divorce and to limit family size. No one goes by the Bible anymore. One in a thousand marriages are good. And fewer than that follow the Bible.
But you are a pretty woman. You will probably succeed in finding a man. But now days, it is the woman who needs to be assertive in following THE LORD'S TEACHINGS because of what ends most marriages now days is women not following what the Bible teaches.
How to love your Future Wife as Christ loved the church?
Posted : 6 Oct, 2025 08:43 PM
Response to Handyman62:
Yes, i totally agree modern feminism can affect biblical marriage and love dynamics thats why a Godly Man should find a Godly Traditional woman that knows her identity, role as a wife and that has a heart and values transformed by the holy spirit.
When a woman embraces extreme feminist ideology, she may resist her husband’s spiritual leadership — not because she’s rebellious, but because society has taught her that dependence or trust equals weakness.
Result: tension, competition, and loss of unity in marriage.
In Scripture, men and women are equal in value, worth, and purpose before God — but they are different in roles and design.
📖 Galatians 3:28 says:
> “There is neither male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.”
This means equality in spiritual worth — not sameness in function.
God designed the man to lead in love and the woman to respond in honor, both reflecting His image in different ways.
Feminism, in its modern form, often challenges these biblical distinctions — arguing for sameness instead of complementarity.
Result: it can blur God’s divine order of love and leadership.
So the solution is:
Find a fully transformed traditional Godly woman that has Godly values from the Lord. So that she can show up in the marriage aligned to God's purpose in her life but first the transformation needs to start within a Man's life. To be Christlike, a Christ-like love, the husband matures spiritually. He doesn’t just talk about faith — he lives it out. This transforms his heart, making him more patient, humble, compassionate, and godly. Fulfilling the Man's role to lead in love and the woman to respond in honor, both reflecting God's image.
How to love your Future Wife as Christ loved the church?
Posted : 6 Oct, 2025 08:49 PM
Response to WalkNTalk:
After choosing a Godly Traditional woman that i talked about with Handyman62 once in Marriage, I do think its still the Man's role to be an example to his wife so that every Marriages will not end in divorce. A big change will happen if the husband will first do his part as a man to hear his wife's heart, concerns, fears, hurts without dismissing her feelings and response with defensiveness. Anyway thats another topic lol. My point is before it gets to divorce its very obvious the wife had her concerns but its not being met. And its the husbands role to show leadership in leaning in to her and lead her to different healthy approaches for reconciliation if its therapy, pastor's counseling, etc.
Me i do not believe in divorce i respect God's union. Worst case scenario like infidelity with no remorse, or life threatening physical abuse then ill do it. But overall i will practice to respect Gods union in Marriage. By the way in the Philippines we don't have divorce only annulment.
📖 Malachi 2:16
> “For the Lord, the God of Israel, says that He hates divorce.”
God “hates” divorce not because He hates divorced people — but because He hates the pain, betrayal, and brokenness it causes. Marriage is meant to reflect God’s unbreakable covenant love with His people.
Jesus reaffirmed this original design and clarified that divorce was permitted, not commanded, because of humanity’s hardness of heart.
📖 Matthew 19:3–9
> The Pharisees asked Jesus, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason?”
Jesus replied, “What God has joined together, let no one separate.”
They asked, “Why did Moses allow divorce?”
Jesus said, “Moses permitted it because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning.
I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”
So, Jesus allowed one clear biblical ground for divorce:
➡️ Sexual immorality (infidelity, adultery, unfaithfulness).
This doesn’t mean divorce must happen in that case — but that it may happen.
Forgiveness and restoration are always encouraged when possible, but Jesus recognizes the deep wound caused by betrayal.
Biblical View
God’s design Marriage is a lifelong covenant (Gen 2:24, Matt 19:6)
God’s heart He hates divorce because it causes pain (Mal 2:16)
Preferred path Forgiveness, reconciliation, and restoration when possible
God’s grace Healing and renewal for the divorced and brokenhearted
The Husband Is the Head — Not as a Tyrant, but as a Servant-Leader
📖 Ephesians 5:23
> “For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.”
Headship doesn’t mean domination — it means responsibility, covering, and initiative.
Christ didn’t wait for the church to love Him first; He loved first, even when the church was unworthy.
The Man Sets the Spiritual and Emotional Tone
In every healthy Christian home, the spirit of love, peace, and holiness usually flows from the husband’s leadership.
When a man leads with patience, forgiveness, and prayer, the atmosphere in the home shifts. His wife and children respond naturally to that love.
In other words:
When the man leads with love, the woman feels safe enough to respond with respect and devotion.
📖 Ephesians 5:25
> “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her.”
The word “gave Himself up” shows that love must start with him — a love that gives, not demands.
A woman’s heart is designed to respond.
When she feels cherished, secure, and honored, her love, respect, and submission flow effortlessly.
So in the divine pattern:
Man initiates love →
Woman responds with respect →
Marriage mirrors Christ and the Church.
That’s why Paul says:
📖 Ephesians 5:33
> “Each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.”
Conclusion:
So i believe to truly experience a loving, happy, soft, submissive, forgiving Wife in a relationship, Its the mans role to lead and do the sacrifices just as how Christ showed love and grace to the Church. When a husband leads in love,
The wife flourishes in peace and security
The home becomes stable and joyful
The family witnesses the character of Christ
God’s presence rests upon the household
In short:
A man’s love sets the direction; a woman’s response completes the harmony. It will not start with the woman/ wife.
How to love your Future Wife as Christ loved the church?
Posted : 7 Oct, 2025 06:02 AM
Already you are departing from the scriptures; you would divorce Christ for having more than one.
In the Bible, a male can have more than one. (2 Samuel 12:8, Isaiah 4:1, Matthew 25:1, Genesis 30, Genesis 25:6 and 2 Samuel 5:13) Yet you teach otherwise. Jesus is greater than Solomon. Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines. If we love Jesus, we want to share him with others. But you don't want to share Jesus. You don't want to place others into his arms. You want to divorce him if he has another. As it is, women have many men. This is against Bible teachings. In the Bible, women are to be monogamous, and women are to keep their virginity for their first husband. But most are not virgins for their first husband. There are no New Testament commands that allow for divorce. You are not even married yet, and you are already talking divorce. You tell God why you would divorce a man. In the Bible, it was given to a man, not a woman. To a husband. Not a wife. TO DIVORCE. (Deuteronomy 24:1-4) Already you are saying that you would go against scripture teachings. In the Bible, a woman is to go free without any payment of money (Exodus 21:11), and a man gets to keep his house. (Deuteronomy 24:1-4) I suppose you go against that as well. You are already going against God. Already you justify going your own way against Bible teachings, yet you have rules for a man. That is why the Bible teaches that it is better not to marry. (Matthew 19:10 and 1 Corinthians 7:1) More, the Bible teaches Proverbs 31:10 and Ecclesiastes 7:28. No woman is Proverbs 31:12. Such a woman is improbable to find.
How to love your Future Wife as Christ loved the church?
Posted : 7 Oct, 2025 06:16 AM
Already you are saying why you would divorce.
It is not the woman's place in scripture to divorce.
That belongs to the man. Not the government. Not the wife. (Deuteronomy 24:1-4) But already you are replacing Bible teachings with other teachings. That is why it is good not to marry.
How to love your Future Wife as Christ loved the church?
Posted : 7 Oct, 2025 06:51 AM
How is a man to lead when the woman wants to take over?
But you are right that it is the man who is to lead. (Numbers 30)
The husband is to have authority.
Before a girl marries, her father is to be the decider and is to be reverenced. He is to have authority. But it is a FLIP-FLOP TOPSY-TURVY WORLD WHERE RIGHT IS WRONG AND WRONG IS RIGHT AND NO ONE FOLLOWS THE BIBLE. NOT EVEN THE CHRISTIANS. NOT EVEN THE JEWS.
WOMEN RULE! (Consider Isaiah 3:12 and Isaiah 3:16)
Women proclaim "MY BODY, MY CHOICE" with no regard for the body growing inside them.
They say, "WOMEN HAVE THE RIGHT TO CHOOSE"! NO REGARD for God. NO REGARD for the Bible. NO REGARD for an unborn child. NO REGARD for father or husband. Women want abortion, divorce and to limit family size. It is not a good time to marry. How does on love one's future wife as Christ loved the church except to go to the cross? Marriage is a cross, and we die for sinners.
